What you're looking at is believed to be the oldest sculpture of a human found to date, and was carved out of a mammoth's tusk. That's right, mammoth -- the very same mount Jesus used to ride into battle. Wow!
The distorted object, which portrays a woman with huge breasts, big buttocks and exaggerated genitals, is thought to be at least 35,000 years old.
The 6cm-tall figurine, reported in the journal Nature, is the latest find to come from Hohle Fels Cave in Germany.
"I think there are good reasons to emphasise sexual interpretations, but we really don't know whether it is coming from a more male or a more female perspective. We don't know very much about how the artefact was used."
Oh man, those cave people were a classy bunch, were they not? They so were. And such the artisans. But seriously, is that really the way women used to look back then? Because, if so, BBW AND mammoths? *firing up time machine* Somebody smells a threesome!
Hit the jump for another picture with more angles.
German 'Venus' may be oldest yet [bbcnews]
Thanks to b00geyman, coprohead and junkyard dog, who are all into older women.