Can you believe it? Parents are actually breaking the code of "secret" text speak that teenagers use to talk dirty to one another and make plans to *gasp* smoke the marijuana. Ever wondered what the secret codes that teenagers are bashing out on mobile phones and computers mean? Well, wonder no more. A list of the top 50 acronyms that every parent should know... | More →

This is a USB drive that looks like a spoonful of cereal. And, just like Mary Poppins would say, "a spoonful of cereal helps the....WHY ARE THERE GRAPE NUTS IN MY LAPTOP, YOU LITTLE BITCHES?!?" Hit the jump to see a video of the cereal in action. | More →

This is a new $18 shirt from Threadless that features Mario buying drugs from his little mushroom-headed dealer. As you can see, one star coin scores three whole shrooms, which is a pretty good deal if you ask me. But who's asking me? YO MAMA. Ooooh, burn! But seriously, this reminds me of the time I was duped into buying a bag of oregano... | More →

A shirt being sold by Amazon that features three wolf heads howling at the moon has receiving over 500 reviews and seriously increased sales. Most of the reviews mention the shirt's magical properties. Here's the one that got it all started: This item has wolves on it which makes it intrinsically sweet and worth 5 stars by itself, but once I tried it on,... | More →

This is a short infomercial for Paper Towels. I only watched like five seconds of it before I started daydreaming about who would win in a fight, this guy or Vince 'ShamWow' Shalomi. Then I realized I would kill them both because I ride into battle on a dinosaur holding a smaller dinosaur! Then I went out for a gelati and rubbed sunblock on... | More →

Looking for some retro-gaming flair you can stick to the fridge? Enter MagnetGames' Etsy shop. Seen here is a small sampling of a 22-piece, $30 Super Mario magnet set. Mario not doing it for you? Hit the jump for some Zelda, Pac-Man and Tetris action. Shit, there might even be an $8 cheeseburger coaster set. And no, I didn't just post this because I... | More →

This is a time-lapse video of the center of the Milky Way Galaxy rising over Texas from 9:20 PM to 6:43 AM on April 21-22, 2009, during a star party. Now I have no idea what a star party is, but if it's anything like the last bachelor party I went to, I want in. We could even shoot the hooker's body into space... | More →

The Queen of England was presented with a gold-plated Wii as part of a publicity stunt to hype up new title Big Family Games, which I have the feeling is gonna suck so hard. BIG Family Games is the ultimate Wii game to get all family members, from grandparents to young children, playing together. The Royal Family is arguably the most important family in... | More →

These is a little gallery of amazing animal hand paintings created by somebody who I don't know who is. But whoever they are, they sure did a great job. So great, in fact, I've been inspired to paint my own. Well, what do you think? It's a robin. That? That's the worm it's eating. Oh -- looks like he's having a little trouble keeping... | More →

Whack-a-Kitty is just like Whac-A-Mole at Chuck-E-Cheese except instead of winning tickets you win getting to clean litterboxes and waking up at all ungodly hours of the night. That said, this is the cutest thing I've seen in awhile. And I saw a baby duck riding a bunny riding a puppy at the park yesterday, so that's saying a lot. Whac-A-Kitty Is a Case... | More →

LEGO has just released the first two of six sets in an 'Architecture' series celebrating the iconic work of Frank Lloyd Wright. Also, I have been to Fallingwater. So yeah, put that in your Guggenheim and smoke it. The release of the LEGO structures coincides with the real Guggenheim Museum's "From Within Outward" exhibition, which is a celebration of 50 years of Wright's continued... | More →

Apparently some 16-year old girl dove into traffic because she dropped her iPod in the street and had already blasted her remaining brains out at level 11 volume. The girl was walking across the street on Tuesday when she dropped her iPod. She went back to grab it in moving traffic and was, unsurprisingly, hit by the approaching pickup truck. She suffered a broken... | More →

And if you could incorporate a beer helmet into it, it would be awesomest hat ever possible to make. I made this hat for my son - he wanted a mean shark. I saw the dead fish hat pattern and loved the idea - I just varied the pattern quite a lot to make different looking species. And felted it so it looks like... | More →

Well if those aren't the happy faces of three urine-guzzling fools, I don't know what are. At the international space station, it was one small sip for man and a giant gulp of recycled urine for mankind. Astronauts aboard the space station celebrated a space first on Wednesday by drinking water that had been recycled from their urine, sweat and water that condenses from... | More →

Dunlop, in a move to prove that their tires won't explode even while upside-down, made a giant loopty-loop and had some tiny car ride through it. Not much more to say, except I could have done two consecutive loops. On fire. While banging a dinosaur. In the backseat. Loop-the-Loop Dunlop World Record [metro] Thanks to Andy, who once rode a roller coaster with his... | More →

Some BBC employee allegedly took a picture of a ghost at a museum in England. This is the picture, and, quite frankly, I just don't see it. Unless it's an Arab smoking a hookah with a hand down his pants. That I can see. Mr Sandys, 30, was photographing at the reputedly haunted Edward Jenner Museum in Berkeley, Gloucestershire, and captured the image on... | More →

Tetris soap is tetrad shaped soap pieces that make a perfect addition to the seashell soaps in your guest bathroom that I'm never sure if I'm supposed to use but do anyway. They're made by Digital Soaps, the same folks that brought us the video game controller soaps. 8 ounces of tetrads will set you back $10, but they also have little Space Invader... | More →

In the same vein as the famous photo reproductions (and classic video games), this is a little gallery of movie posters made using LEGO blocks. I posted some of my favorites after the jump, but there are 21 in total (some of which were made by Flickr user Craig Lyons)so hit the link to see all of them if you're into that sort of... | More →

This is a video of the future according to Microsoft. And, despite not owning a Zune, I would totally live there. In a treehouse, bitches, a treehouse. Close your eyes -- can you see it? It looks like Tarzan dry humping Judy Jane Jetson. Microsoft's REAL Vision of the Future [gizmodo] | More →

A 47-million year old skeleton of what is believed to be the "missing link" in human's evolutionary split from tree-swinging, bug picking, shit throwing apes has been found in Germany and nicknamed "Ida". "This is the first link to all humans," Hurum, of the Natural History Museum in Oslo, Norway, said in a statement. Ida represents "the closest thing we can get to a... | More →

Hell yeah I am too. The Clock Clock tells time using a digital-looking display made up of 24 smaller, analog clocks. It is a pretty neat idea and is best viewed from far away otherwise you might burn your retinas out or go crazy like that guy in that movie that was all like AAAAAAAHH! Created by Swedish designers Humans Since 1982, the Clock... | More →

Somebody in St. Louis, Missouri is selling a sword that may or may not be the one David used to chop that punk bitch Goliath's monster nog off after getting him all stoned. Wow, I should really teach Sunday School. B.C. sword the question is ? Is this the sword of the giant, that little young David chopped the giant head off ? I... | More →

Not to be outdone by the new Wii Punch-Out!! game that just dropped, here comes a video of the original Punch-Out!! the way it was meant to be played: with, uh, a bunch of buttons attached to a boxing dummy. While cool in theory, it leaves a little something to be desired in practice. Namely, everything. Still, I do like the sound it makes... | More →

Beef jerky underwear is $139 underwear made out of untreated beef jerky. It is nutritious, delicious and sexy as all get-out. It kicks the shit out of those other edible underwears because those things taste awful even though they look like they should taste like Fruit Roll-Ups. Plus these ones are meatier. RAWR! Note the time and care that has gone into crafting this... | More →

Want to look like a shark attack victim? I know, who doesn't? Well now thanks to a line of wetsuits by Diddo (the same guy that created these designer gas masks), you can. But if shark attack victim isn't for you, what about an anatomical muscle suit? Or wood? Or a rusted pattern? Hit the jump to see all the options. Currently only available... | More →

The Tenshi no Hizamakura (Angels Knee Pillow) is a little bench designed to get men lower to the action and help prevent urine misplacement. No word if it actually comes with the flying pee genie in the picture, but that would pretty awesome if it did (and also a bargain at $60). ...according to the manufacturer, House Doctor, urinating into the toilet from a... | More →

NOTE: I embedded the video in high quality so it may take a minute to load. This is a little movie made using nothing by LEGO Mindstorm NXT sets and LEGO blocks. It is amazing. Plus, it's about pirates, so double whammy. The movie is only 2:20 long, and the rest of the video shows you what's behind the curtain, so you can understand... | More →

As a man-child who's no stranger to chugging beers and puking on himself and then losing a shoe and cell phone only to find them both in the kitchen trash the next morning, I love beer. Like, love it, love it. But only bottles, not cans (cut me once, shame on you, cut me twice SHAME ON YOU AGAIN, YOU ARE A TERRIBLE LOVER!).... | More →

These e-ink timepieces were created by Phosphor Watches and feature patented e-ink technology. What is e-ink? THE INK THAT SITS IN FRONT OF F-INK DURING ROLL CALL! The principal components of electronic ink are millions of tiny microcapsules, about the diameter of a human hair. In one incarnation, each microcapsule contains positively charged white particles and negatively charged black particles suspended in a clear... | More →

What do you buy for the man who has nothing? While you ponder that nugget of vast intellectuality, I'll tell you about this 2GB Transformer memory stick (which is way better than these ones). Probably the awesomest USB drive I've seen in forever, the unit transforms from a normal looking USB ding-dongle into Ravage, a fierce jungle cat Decepticon (which some believe to be... | More →

In the most anticipated release since the last homoerotic game from Japan comes Muscle Koushinkyoku (Muscle March) for the Wii Virtual Console. Dropping May 26th, the 800 Wii Point game combines erotic fantasy with Human Tetris like gameplay. And I, for one, can hardly wait. So, in the meantime, who wants to go people watch at the gym with me? Cool, I'll be in... | More →

Impressive, but I would have gone with a triple gainer with a twist. Twisted ankle. I'm so clumsy! Now somebody bring me an ice pack, I threw a hip out humping a dinosaur pillow last night -- AND this morning. I AM A LOVEMAKING MACHINE! Physics WIN [current] Thanks to Andrew, who once popped one of those balls at the gym and everyone thought... | More →

Just in time for the new movie, Toys-Я-Us is selling $13 T-600 (looks more like a T-6 if you ask me) costumes for children. I mean, it's not even Halloween. You let your kid run around the neighborhood with this thing on and it's game over, man! Wait, that was Aliens. Anyway, the costumes were made to compliment the rest of the crap they're... | More →

Want your very own Tribble from the original Star Trek series? Well you're in luck, thanks to a $5,000 eBay auction behind held by the son of Scotty (James Doohan). This rare, large, walking Tribble is one of only 6 ever made and was used on the 1967 original Star Trek episode, "The Trouble with Tribbles" . Not only is this Tribble in great... | More →

The Infinite Slinky may look like a belt sander taped to a tissue box, but I don't think that's what it is (that's exactly what it is). The device was created by Geekologie Reader (and Stupid Inventor) Zachary, who obviously grew up in a one story house. Thanks, Zachary, but I think I speak for all of us when I say Log. Just sayin'... | More →

That's right folks, a toilet that Twitters every time it's flushed. Because if that's not a sign of the apocalypse, what is? Your mom making out with a robot. Oh, I thought you were asking. What do you mean I said it? LISTEN, I KNOW WHAT I'M DOING! Now, where were we? Right, a Twittering toilet. @ last user: Great, you clogged me --... | More →

Like this. At least that's how they do it in Moscow. From Russia With Love, baby! Also, with nesting dolls and bacon vodka. Suck it, Mr. Bond, you just got stirred! Hit the jump for another shot of the girl in action just in case you thought it was fake or something. OH YEAH -- WELL YOUR DIAMOND IS FAKE!... | More →

The Super Falcon isn't a bird at all. OR IS IT?!? No, it's not. It's a submarine with wings. The brainchild of British inventor Graham Hawkes, the sub is capable of diving to depths of 1,500 feet, achieving breakneck speeds of up to six knots (~7MPH or some really kinky bondage), and traveling approximately 25 nautical miles on a battery charge. Mr Hawkes said:... | More →

This is a video of an experiment called 'Puppy Pulling Power' that helps determine which breed of dog women respond to most. Basically some guy attached a digital camera to a dog's collar that takes a picture every time it detects a smile. Or breasts. Quite possibly breasts. Whatever the case, I'm adopting everything the pound has to offer. Cats too. Ladies? Hit the... | More →

I mean, she is still a nurse. Hit the Flickr link for a ton more, all of which are scarily sexy. Flickr Gallery via A Truly Creepy Silent Hill Nurse Cosplay [kotaku] Thanks to Julian, who would still hit it like a sackful of penicillin. | More →

Young Geekologie Reader Izzy Slypig went and made himself a 1GB gluestick flashdrive. It rotates up and out of the container as you twist the bottom. That is all. But, if you've ever wanted to steal computer files from preschool, now's your chance. Hit the jump for three more shots of the drive in various states of twist.... | More →

This is another video of students from the Polish Wroclaw University of Technology turning one of their dorms into a giant 12 x 10 four-color display. They play all kind of games and animations, so feel free to skip around and realize just how much time was wasted. The group responsible calls themselves P.I.W.O., which is apparently the equivalent of B.E.E.R. in English. Of... | More →

Is Microsoft working on a device that combines functionality of the XBox 360 and Zune? I don't even know what the hell that would be, but maybe. The project, codenamed "xYz," is said to feature a WVGA touchscreen and a way to play music and movies on both the device as well as the Xbox 360. Basically, it's going to be a connected handheld... | More →

A Saudi inventor was recently denied a German patent for what is being described as a "killer chip". What is a killer chip? Cooler Ranch Doritos, hands down. The basic model would consist of a tiny GPS transceiver placed in a capsule and inserted under a person's skin, so that authorities could track him easily. Model B would have an extra function -- a... | More →