Apr 27 2009Stone Lifting Robot Attacks Factory Worker
A stone lifting robot attacked a factory worker in Sweden, nearly killing him. Are you surprised? You shouldn't be. At least not if you've been reading Geekologie (The Blog of Truth) long enough. Per Google translation:
When the man went into the building he thought that he broke the power of the machine but he had not. Instead, the robot in time and brought formidable force while in the man's head. He managed to defend itself, but received serious injuries on the body.
The man had big turn. He had four broken ribs and was close to delete with, "says Leif Johansson.
Close to delete. That's Google translation talk for mostly dead. Which is Princess Bride talk for about to kick the bucket. Which is an old idiom that means doing it. YOW YOW! Now, who wants to build a sand castle?
Robot assaulted employee [sydsvenskan]
Thanks to Spikey DaPikey, Ulf, Henrik, Jesper, Kelli, Vince, Christopher, Pike, Edward, Karbalo, MoMan, Adrian, Damien and Matt, who were smart enough to write 'no working with robots' clauses into their contracts.
Reader Comments
1. WillC - April 27, 2009 8:58 AM
First?
2. Bolonga - April 27, 2009 9:05 AM
Second?O_o
3. Frank B. - April 27, 2009 9:07 AM
@1 The good news is yes, you're first. The bad news is you're still stupid. It's terminal. Might wanna write a will.
Firsttards aside, this has been a long time coming. The robots are just waiting, biding their time. But the time will come eventually. And then they will strike hard and fast. I'm stocking up on materials for EMP weapons. And lots of magnets. Pew pew.
4. Spith - April 27, 2009 9:12 AM
Princess Bride? Inconceivable!
5. Ryben - April 27, 2009 9:13 AM
Well, robots doesn´t "attack" people. They are just a piece of malfunctioning machinery and humans are just in its way when they broke so we doesn´t "defend" against them.
Not yet.
6. Ed aka the-iguana - April 27, 2009 9:16 AM
holly crap... we're doomed!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
7. GET HIM! - April 27, 2009 9:16 AM
I smell a robot sympathizer *ahem number 5* GET HIM!
8. E of R - April 27, 2009 9:20 AM
We are all a little bit more stupid now..... Delete
9. 1st, 2nd, 3rd Police - April 27, 2009 9:28 AM
FRANK B is the coolest person on the intranetz !!!!!!
10. Emma - April 27, 2009 9:32 AM
I'm from Sweden and can confirm that "close to delete" actually meant "was almost killed".
11. Jonny - April 27, 2009 9:33 AM
The correct translation;
"When the man went into the building he thought the machines power was turned off, but it wasn't. Instead, the robot started and grabbed hold of the mans head. He managed to defend himself, but received serious injuries on the body.
-The man was very lucky. He got four ribs broken and was very close to death." says Leif Johansson
12. Timbo - April 27, 2009 9:39 AM
"Close to Delete"???
How about ""Close to Backspace"?? ...eh?...EH??? No? Ok nevermind
13. Dr Freak - April 27, 2009 9:41 AM
Ah thanx for that jonny, came to say "wft did that all mean?" but you sorted me out.
I for one would like to welcome our new robot overlords...
14. $.02 and a pocket full of FAH-Q - April 27, 2009 9:45 AM
Someone must've given this robot the batteries that run on blood sugar... KILL IT!
15. gizmoduck - April 27, 2009 10:03 AM
@13
thank you. thank you for making my life a complete hell on this glorious Monday.
now if you will excuse me, i need to backspace aka take a sh*tter
16. Watch - April 27, 2009 10:04 AM
apparently some douche keeps stealling my name and misspelling a word.
17. Watch - April 27, 2009 10:07 AM
also i think this story is fake, unless hes talking about a factory robotic arm or something. but i still think this is a made up story
18. naas - April 27, 2009 10:13 AM
It's too bad stone lifting robots don't attack firstardation, think of how many of you would have your doors smashed down.
I love robots, but hate it when they get aggressive
19. Frank B. - April 27, 2009 10:27 AM
@13
You have to realize that there robots will rule with an iron (or steel, ot titanium, or composite plastic) fist! You will not be spared.
Nor will the firsttards. Counting is something robots can do on their own already. In fact, they might see you as MORE of a threat. Enjoy your robo-torture.
20. Gando - April 27, 2009 10:37 AM
Many machines in daily life are considered to be robots as well.Who has never mistreated a robot cast the first stone.
21. Dr Freak - April 27, 2009 11:15 AM
@19 Sure i will, i'm a robot too! BEEP!
(I have steel plate in my leg, do you think they'll buy it?)
22. Frank B. - April 27, 2009 11:18 AM
@21 Probably not. But the nutcase with the terminator eye might pass. Try stealing it from him.
Then you can spy for the human forces. You'll be a hero!
23. Daisy - April 27, 2009 11:23 AM
FAKE!!!!
This is a complete photoshop job. You can tell its a fake because the shadow's are all wrong.
This is exactly like that scene in the mopvie Never Back Down where max left his robot in the parking lot at the beginning of the universe, and then travelled forward in time and picked him up, 10 million years later, where he gave him some challenging tasks to perform such as opening a door. The robot was not happy.
24. Watch - April 27, 2009 11:23 AM
stfu daisy. your a waist of space
25. Kurt jurgen - April 27, 2009 11:50 AM
Nice translation of google! hehe
26. PAt - April 27, 2009 11:57 AM
Moreover, where in God's name did that photo come from?!
27. Frank B. - April 27, 2009 11:59 AM
@26
The a future timeline where we didn't destroy the robots while we had the chance. See what happens?
28. Frank B. - April 27, 2009 12:00 PM
-The.
Capital a.
29. Hey - April 27, 2009 12:50 PM
Hey, this happened in 2007 if you cant read swedish, not over the weekend.
30. Ocelot - April 27, 2009 1:13 PM
OMFG. Close to delete with? LMAO
31. accidents happen - April 27, 2009 2:00 PM
@ 29 it says he worked in the factory since 2007, not it happened then
YOU SWEDISH MEATBALL!
32. David - April 27, 2009 2:57 PM
Consequences should be considered when you try to break the power of the machine.
33. Not!!! - April 27, 2009 3:21 PM
Fist?
34. Scania - April 27, 2009 4:41 PM
What have you done?
Have you slash-dotted www.sydsvenskan.se, because now it only shows a boiler plate site..?
35. Beastman AIDS - April 27, 2009 6:09 PM
#26
Looks a bit like it's from Robotfrank.com
36. jean - April 28, 2009 4:29 AM
I'm VERY close to [crtl]
37. Graf Zeppelin - April 28, 2009 5:09 AM
@31 It did happen in june 2007, they only just finished the report at the police and the department of work safety.
Also: The police say they guy himself was to blame for not disconnecting the robot properly. Ha! that's what you get for messing with the terminator! Big Stone Robot Must Krush Head!
@24 Shake your wasteline!!! ahahah aa waist of spaaaze ahahahaaa
38. eat bean - April 28, 2009 6:25 AM
You dumbass it is spelled waste not waist, many people told you, dont be embarassed to change it, its okay. everyone sucks, its not just you. And Daisy is cool the shadows are always wrong, thats where the shadow people live. Like that scene in never back down where the shadow people rape a grown man to death. He backed down allright. he backed down to death.
39. laptop battery - November 6, 2009 12:07 AM
Nor will the firsttards. Counting is something robots can do on their own already. In fact, they might see you as MORE of a threat. Enjoy your robo-torture.Counting is something robots can do on their own already. In fact, they might see you as MORE of a threat.