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ShamWow Guy ShamPows Hooker's Face

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First of all, Vince Shlomi, the ShamWow guy, is 44 years old. In the infomercials he doesn't look a day over a very douchey 25. Secondly, a $1,000 hooker tried biting his tongue off during a sexual encounter at a South Beach hotel and Vince was forced to ShamPow her in the face until she let go. Damn, that is some freaky cannibal S & M shit. And lastly, since when is being the ShamWow guy not enough to get a dude laid for free? Next thing you know you'll tell me Ron Popeil isn't sticking his Solid Flavor Injector to a bunch of groupies. Now back me up here, Ron. Ron? What do you mean you're a 'Pocket Fisherman'?

Hit the jump for a raggedly looking ShamWow guy and hooker.

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ShamWow Guy In Slap, Chop Bust [thesmokinggun]

Thanks to Anna, Vossk, Jacen and Billy Mays, who once killed a hooker and didn't have to ShamWow up any blood because they were smart enough to use a tarp.

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