Mar 15 2009Guy Loses Finger, Replaces With Flash Drive
Jerry Jalava is a hacker who lost half his left ring finger in a motorcycle accident and decided to replace the digit with a USB drive. So now he sports a rubber half-finger with thumb(!)drive inside. Awesome. Plus, if he ever has to wear a wedding ring it won't count because it's not a real finger. Am I right? Because that's why I cut mine off. Just kidding, I was really high and trying to make a bong in shop class.
Hit the jump for three more shots of the digital digitry.
USB finger, more details [protoblogr]
Thanks to Pau, who makes sure to wash his hands before touching his junk so he doesn't get any crazy viruses from the door to the men's room.
Related Stories
Not For Airline Travel: Ninja Kunai USB Drive (09/21/2009)
It Was Only A Matter Of Time: 128GB Flashes (06/19/2009)
Geekologie Reader Make USB Gluestick (05/18/2009)
Guy Gets Arm Replaced Luke Skywalker Style (01/20/2009)
I Am Stupid, These Are Better iPhone Gloves (12/17/2008)
Reader Comments
1. lo - March 15, 2009 5:18 PM
I would put a dildo in my hand for the ladies...sure they would appreciate it
2. bottledspearkercup - March 15, 2009 5:18 PM
first
3. bottledspearkercup - March 15, 2009 5:20 PM
nooooooooooo!!!! what ever,
so tis guy's a hacker...?
4. ur not first - March 15, 2009 5:20 PM
ur not first....grow up
5. haha, loser - March 15, 2009 5:23 PM
I love it when people say first and they FAIL hahahaha
6. this - March 15, 2009 5:29 PM
why does it bother you guys so much when someone says first
7. SDF - March 15, 2009 5:29 PM
Wow this guy looks like some creepy pedophile. Thats not even including the finger. Kinda a mix between the Joker and Clyde from army of two.
8. Jamerz - March 15, 2009 5:34 PM
It looks so natural!!!!!!!
9. Jeff - March 15, 2009 5:36 PM
Yeah he looks like a druggie. Might need some sleep.
Anyone know how much memory his fingerdrive has?
10. Daisy - March 15, 2009 5:36 PM
FAKE!!!!
This is a complete photoshop job. You can tell its a fake because the shadow's are all wrong.
This is exactly like that scene in the movie Never BAck Down where Max substituted Canada mints for Rush Limbaughs oxy contin. He became Canada's RUSH, and started to play some really cool music at arena's all over the world. When he got huingry, he ate Geddy Lee, thinking he was a french Fry.
11. soup - March 15, 2009 5:37 PM
He could either be Edward Scissorands' cousin or Severus Snape's lost brother.
12. Ads - March 15, 2009 5:40 PM
Ugh, he could have put some bleedin' effort in, that's a totally shabby job :(
13. Dan - March 15, 2009 5:41 PM
The guy looks like a paedophile.
14. Bigguy707 - March 15, 2009 5:43 PM
I Love You Daisy!!!
15. haha, loser - March 15, 2009 5:48 PM
@6 it's a game and also it makes others that are second but say first douche bags. haha.
16. Apples - March 15, 2009 6:05 PM
Hackers dont use macs
17. Spikey DaPikey - March 15, 2009 6:15 PM
That's just weird !!!
18. Kup - March 15, 2009 6:23 PM
think how quick technolgy changes. he'll show his age when in 5 years, he'll have all they ladies marvel at his 5GB flash drive, when then the norm will be like a 100 GB flash drive.
19. lopfie - March 15, 2009 6:29 PM
ha noob! i lost my penis in a motorcicle accident too NOW I GOT A PENIS USB HA-HA!
20. Darth - March 15, 2009 6:36 PM
The modern variant of the little boy sticks his finger into a dike tale.
21. Tricky Ricky - March 15, 2009 6:53 PM
Finger Flash..I guess it all depends on where it sticks it ...to figure out which virus he's caught...
22. Tennist0 - March 15, 2009 6:55 PM
19- thats a sad story...*sniff* the poor penis, lol
anyway, where do i sign up for one? i want an ipod instead of a whole hand... can i negotiate for that? make it a touch... not, maybe the penis thing would be good, i could tell the ladies my penis is interactively touchable... this is scary
23. Angel Mass - March 15, 2009 7:02 PM
Ladies and Gentleman , I give you a true geek
24. eric - March 15, 2009 7:03 PM
@18
If it's detachable, as the last picture indicates, it's probably not a big deal to swap out the actual drive.
25. firstgold - March 15, 2009 7:19 PM
I think it really does look fake. DX
26. D - March 15, 2009 7:28 PM
A hacker? With a Mac? .. MMWWHAHAAHAHAAAAA OOohh man
27. formerly SPELLINGNAZI© - March 15, 2009 7:55 PM
Is it just me, or does it seem like the majority of the weekend posters are fcuking retards? This time zone thing sucks, I'm at work already and most of the people here are still sleeping off a hangover...
28. tip - March 15, 2009 8:08 PM
hmmm. look at pic1. that's his right hand.
29. JJtoob - March 15, 2009 8:46 PM
Wow, I got a flashback from an article I read on a computer magazine once, and it talked of flash drives in one's fingers. I never thought I'd see it in real life.
30. Ed aka the-iguana - March 15, 2009 8:57 PM
man, thats weird...
for those questioning the hacker with mac thingy... mac = unix... like REAL hackers, not those hackers that download little programs that do everything for them and then call themselves hackers :|
31. Elboroto - March 15, 2009 9:36 PM
He'll be the first person in the world to give herpes to a laptop. Somehow.
32. darkfall13 - March 15, 2009 10:02 PM
Uh his "finger" looks like utter crap...
33. peep - March 15, 2009 10:03 PM
well a laptop always was and surely always will be the only thing hes ever gonna be able to stick his finger into anyway...
34. TheloneusKool - March 15, 2009 10:04 PM
this is obviously fake. The fake finger switched from left to right hand. he is just putting it over his noraml fingers. GW writer...you got swindeled
35. brian - March 15, 2009 10:15 PM
It would be funnier if it was his thumb
36. buttporn - March 15, 2009 10:18 PM
Yep, #34 is right... the hand switches from the first to second picture.. he's just putting it over his real finger.. lol
37. Watch - March 15, 2009 10:45 PM
this is kinda cool. @ 2 is technically first because if you look at the timestamp he posted at the exact minute and second as 1.
38. naas - March 15, 2009 10:46 PM
@15 It's not a game actually, it's an immaturity dorks like yourself have to relieve themselves every time the opportunity presents itself.
This kid with the fake flash drive finger looks like emo's older brother, hasn't let go of non conformity yet cause he's still too dark for society.
39. naas - March 15, 2009 10:49 PM
@37 god just die Watch... All the way down here @37 & you're interested in some firstard comment...... jeezus get a fukk'n life you're almost as bad as that fecophiliac softlicious
40. ho - March 15, 2009 11:05 PM
i hope he wipes with his right
41. Somebody - March 16, 2009 12:32 AM
Since he probably doesn't work for the CIA: Epic FAIL.
would've made stealing state secrets easy....probably has LOL CATS in the finger....or porn...yeah most likely porn. Borg wanna-be from Star Trek....
42. KribyPeanuckle - March 16, 2009 12:56 AM
Worst super-villian ever
43. Xeta - March 16, 2009 12:57 AM
eww
44. GhettoT - March 16, 2009 2:08 AM
First!
Guy loses finger, replaces it with USB drive and a piece of gum!
45. GhettoT - March 16, 2009 2:12 AM
Wasn't he the bad guy in Charlie's Angels?
46. GhettoT - March 16, 2009 2:15 AM
Number 19:
You should've used a PEZ dispenser instead
47. kat - March 16, 2009 2:37 AM
um hate to be noticing shit, but it def does not swtich hands. its the same hand hes just holding it differently.
48. Greg - March 16, 2009 6:25 AM
Who cares?
49. Lucy - March 16, 2009 7:14 AM
I bet he likes to stick it in.
lol @ Elboroto
50. Scrodo - March 16, 2009 8:11 AM
@10 - WTF are you on about?
51. Spith - March 16, 2009 8:31 AM
It does appear to change hands, but that's probably cos of his stupid Mac picture-reversing webcam malarkey. I think it's reasonable to assume that among the billions of people in the world, at least one of them will be stupid enough to both lose a finger and replace it with a shoddy-looking USB drive.
52. catch22 - March 16, 2009 9:23 AM
jhonny mnemonic!!
53. kelehendros - March 16, 2009 10:11 AM
horay for cyborgs
54. Sly - March 16, 2009 12:29 PM
I actually thought this was a photoshop job until I saw the closeup. I was totally going to say it was fake. Of course, noone would have believed because of those people who always comment about how things are totally fake photoshop jobs.
Thanks, fake photoshop job commenter guy- you've ruined pointing out fakes for everyone. You've RUINED IT!
55. Kup - March 16, 2009 12:50 PM
next thing you know, they'll invent clocks small enough that people will be able to strap them to their arms.
56. Milkman - March 16, 2009 1:38 PM
Try washing your hair next time and you'll look cooler, 9 fingers!
57. Jeroen - March 16, 2009 3:50 PM
Pim zou het zo gewild hebben..
58. Dus - March 16, 2009 3:57 PM
.......................................
.#................########..
.#................#..................
.#................#..................
.################..
.……..........#..............#..
.……..........#..............#..
.……..........#..............#..
#########..............#..
.......................................
59. erin - March 16, 2009 5:26 PM
It's just so realistic. wow.
60. Scrodo - March 17, 2009 3:31 AM
That guy looks like he touches children. In a bad way.
61. mcdoggus - March 17, 2009 8:17 AM
haha wouldnt it be funny if he left his finger in the usb slot of a computer in some random public place
62. ?Ginger - March 17, 2009 6:26 PM
Can I has him for my birthday? I like creepy ones...
63. Asylum - March 17, 2009 8:02 PM
Now I have seen it all :/
64. james - March 18, 2009 9:14 AM
that is a bounch of shit if u ask me
65. Tiernan - March 18, 2009 9:29 AM
I'm curious how much storage his finger gets.
66. jokenha - March 18, 2009 11:19 AM
You can tell that he is useing the same hand so he is not switching hands its always the right hand so if thats how you thought it was fake look again.
67. The Chort - March 18, 2009 5:48 PM
LAST!!!!!!!!!1!!!!!!!
68. Naterator - March 18, 2009 7:27 PM
What?!?! I was gonna be last. And you had to go and take it. Wait a minute...
69. The Chort - March 18, 2009 10:01 PM
LAST !!!!!!!!!1!!!! again
70. Thing - March 19, 2009 5:46 AM
Hey idiots, does anybody read the message? IT IS A USB STICK, not some kind a gadgy thing where he can take over the planet... IDIOTS!
71. The Chort - March 19, 2009 6:56 AM
#^%& you Thing!
72. Remo - March 19, 2009 8:25 PM
... last.... (to be continued)
73. onimus - March 20, 2009 3:27 AM
@18, PHAIL usb flash drives will never come out in 5 gb or 100 gb models, its impossible with the architecture of a flash drive
74. onimus - March 20, 2009 3:33 AM
lassst!!!!!!!1!!!!!!!
75. The Chort - March 20, 2009 4:48 PM
Oh you can all suck my c0ck! Also last
76. Dan - March 20, 2009 7:57 PM
@73 Oh look an 8gb flash drive
http://www.amazon.co.uk/s/?ie=UTF8&keywords=8gb+memory+sticks&tag=googhydr-21&index=aps&hvadid=3114638239&ref=pd_sl_8e2ztn36y2_b
77. Not first - March 22, 2009 4:10 AM
So, bottledspearkercup thinks he is first and then ends up second. What a prick.
78. specialist hand surgeon - March 22, 2009 10:39 AM
This is wrong, it says his left hand but its actually his right - sort it out!
79. USBMINGE - March 22, 2009 10:44 AM
He can stick that in me any day.
80. The Chort - March 22, 2009 3:47 PM
Last!!!!!!!1!!!!
81. Tha Music Blogging Machine - March 22, 2009 4:06 PM
Haha this is crazy!!!
I want one of those!
82. The Chort - March 22, 2009 8:58 PM
@81 You bag of dick!
83. dodecahedron - March 23, 2009 5:58 PM
@21 - well, i thought it was clever.
84. TheloneusKool - March 23, 2009 8:49 PM
@ 47. naw you must be retarded. look at that pic again. its a switch of hands
85. JD - March 24, 2009 1:37 PM
It's not fake you tards. It's clear.
86. The Chort - March 24, 2009 3:22 PM
OH F.UCK ALL!
87. yomama - March 24, 2009 6:02 PM
Anyone know why this douche gets to be over on the right in teh "So Freaking Cool" stuff? "Cuz this is So Freaking NOT.
88. forgetso - March 25, 2009 12:25 PM
last.
89. The Chort - March 25, 2009 4:25 PM
I SAID LAST DAMMIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1!!!!!!!!!
90. mary-ann - March 25, 2009 9:07 PM
it could be totally fake
91. dcbmb d - March 25, 2009 10:18 PM
I didn't know mac users can hack.
92. cbmb d ea - March 25, 2009 10:25 PM
Also, that doesn't look like a finger.
93. The Chort - March 28, 2009 11:51 AM
LAST!!!!!!!!!!!1!!!! W00T!!!!!!1!!! FINALLY!!!!!!!!!!1!!!
94. Jeroen - April 15, 2009 4:28 AM
:p
95. Jeroen - April 15, 2009 4:29 AM
Ooh and try to keep you shift PRESSED this time..
96. DontHaveOne - June 25, 2009 8:34 PM
The Chort needs to be banned from the internet
>_<
Get a life you tool
97. The Chort 2 - July 14, 2009 4:11 AM
Last. At last!!!! (pun intended)
98. Assassin - December 3, 2009 3:05 PM
Left ring finger gone? Forget USB drives, I'd go for a working version of Altair's Hidden Blade.
99. Vicky - June 23, 2010 8:36 AM
Oh my God it is un believeable that fingure is for the ring.And supposing some one steals that flash,it means you will lose the fingure and the flash disk as well or you files too will diappear.I think it would be better for you to backup your fingure flash online with safecopy onlinebackup.The are secure and you will access your files anywhere.