Michael Harold Lynch received a $206 speeding ticket for doing 54 in a 35MPH work zone. Outraged (I was only 19 over!), he got $206 in small coins, put them in a bag, and pissed all over them. Then he sent the bag in as payment. Shockingly, it wasn't accepted. Turns out Lynch didn't break any laws - it's not necessarily illegal to mail... | More →

A Google Street View car in France spotted these high-brow citizens pissing in the middle of the highway together (I'll hold yours if you hold mine). I guess they don't have rest stops in France. Still, you've got to commend them on their technique. It's similar to what I do, except nothing like it because I just hang my junk out the window. One... | More →

Remember David after the dentist? He was cute, wasn't he? He was. That's because drugs make people cute. And sometimes, their faces melt. It's true, one time at a concert I saw a bus turn into an accordion and Dracula fighting a dinosaur by the concession stand. It was super erotic. Anyway, get your own 'I have two fingers' shirt from ThinkGeek for $16-$18,... | More →

Want to customize your Googling experience with some sweet gaming art? Well now you can thanks to a series of iGoogle gaming themes. Pick from Zelda, Mega Man, Mario, Street Fighter, Spore, WoW, Animal Crossing and a bunch more. Use a different one every day of the week! Or don't, I don't care. It's not like I'm going to beat you over the head... | More →

This is a video of somebody's pet cockatiel singing 'Saria's Song' from The Ocarina of Time (and Majora's Mask and Twilight Princess). The video itself is like three years old though, so I want you to remember to point that out in the comments. Go on, do it. OLD! to you heart's content. Then, when you're done, maybe you could, I dunno, type something... | More →

The Pillow Blanket is a blanket made out of interconnecting pillows that looks comfy as all hell. I want one. And not just for the pillow fights you and I could have! No, I would throw myself down on that mother after a long night of drinking and puke to my stomach's content. But not choke on it -- I ain't going out like... | More →

You know those little wooden models with the interlocking pieces? Yeah, well loyal Geekologie reader Vinss's father blew one of a dinosaur up to a much larger, more manageable size. My father scanned each piece of one and scaled the pieces to a large scale in Photoshop, printed them out and then drew them on plywood planks, cutting them and then assembling them to... | More →

'I Do' wedding bands were created by Sakurako Shimizu and are similar to waveform bracelets but much more matrimonial. They were cast in palladium and 18K gold and feature a waveform version of the words "I do". Of course, if you were smart you'd sneakily have an "I don't" cast. That way, when you're caught groping another woman's teat at the bar you can... | More →

We've already seen several different versions of what it would be like if Mario existed in the real world. And, well, I hope you liked them because here comes another. This one is entitled 'Warp Whistle' and documents the plump little plumber's visit to Chicago. It's only three minutes long, so even if you hate it, you only wasted three minutes. Which, be honest,... | More →

Just like lions attack in the wild, robots are planning on taking out the weakest of our proverbial herd first. Namely, children and old folks. All thanks to a little service class robot named ApriAttenda, by Toshiba. At just one meter tall, the robot can open doors, handle trays and drinks and comes equipped with cameras in its three-fingered hands. The robot is expected... | More →

Remember Alfie Patten, the 13-year old that got his 15-year old girlfriend pregnant? Well, turns out he's not the father after all, and ogres really are the cheating whores I suspected. The fairy tales were true! A DNA test showed a 13-year-old boy in Britain is not the father of a baby born to a 15-year-old he had unprotected sex with once. Chantelle Stedman... | More →

The 'Endless Beer' keychain is a little keychain that gives sad alcoholics everywhere the sensation of opening the same empty beer can over and over. Because honestly, what's more fun than disappointment (besides getting hit in the nuts by the space shuttle)? Available in June, the fun-filled devices will run about $9. And, for as much shit as I talk, I'm totally buying one.... | More →

UPDATE: BACK IN STOCK FOR A LIMITED TIME, GO HERE TO GET ONE. Unfortunately they sold all 3,000 of them between midnight and 6:47 AM this morning. But don't worry, I'm sure a design this popular will be available for regular sale soon. So somebody feel free to drop that link in the comments when it becomes available. Or hell, maybe I'll actually keep... | More →

That's a long picture, isn't it? Almost as long as an elephant's trunk, but not quite. You know, I heard if you took this picture, copied 5,000 of them, and then laid them end to end it would circle Uranus. Haha, how do you fit that thing on the john? I kid. But not really. Anyway, if you want a complete Star Wars figure... | More →

Pfft, that ain't no fail. That, my friends, is a win. A big 'ol Geekologie Writer win. Now who wants to drive me to the toy store? Packaging Fail [failblog] Thanks to junkyard dog, who knows quality children's toys when he sees them. | More →

People have been going all nuts for arcade-style joysticks since Street Fighter IV dropped, so much in fact that the official $150 FightSticks are sold out everywhere online and fetching around $300 on eBay and other sites. Ain't that some shit! But now you can make your own with a little Tupperware and ingenuity. Sure it looks ridiculous, but just think how much more... | More →

This is a short stop-motion video of Bruce Lee and Iron Man duking it out. Now I don't want to ruin it for you, but I will say there are hobbits involved. Intrigued? Choose your own adventure! If you decide to watch the movie, turn to page 68, if you decide not to watch, turn to page 89. Page 68: You die. Page 89:... | More →

Nokia recently held a promotion encouraging designers to make a pair of headphones inspired by their favorite song. The set above is entitled 'I'm Flying' and was (no joke) created in honor of R Kelly's "I Believe I can Fly", which I am now declaring a euphemism for peeing on someone. Per the Geekologie Writer's dictionary: I believe I can fly Slang terminology for... | More →

That's right folks, a beefed up version of the Conficker virus, Conficker C is scheduled to wreak havoc on April 1st. Your grandparents may think it's just a joke, but it's no joke -- this is real life, son! What's known so far is that on April 1, all infected computers will come under the control of a master machine located somewhere across the... | More →

Canned bacon. Undoubtedly the best course of The Last Supper, Yoder brand canned bacon can now be yours. Plus, it comes in sweet-ass camo cans. Hey, where'd my bacon go?!? For the first time in almost 20 years, canned bacon is back in this Country. Not available in any store! More than 2 years went into the development of this bacon, and we're proud... | More →

This is probably the coolest telling of Little Red Riding Hood I've ever seen not including the one where Red was a busty college co-ed and the wolf was just a guy with a monster dong and bear costume (low budget). But he still ate her alright! The grandmother too. *HORFITY HORF HORF BLOW CHUNKS* SlagsmÃ¥lsklubben [vimeo] Thanks to Chris, who has never done... | More →

Well folks, I just got back from the doctor and am happy to announce I don't have inoperable thyroid cancer. However, I am unhappy to announce I came out from the anesthesia with my boxers on backwards. Just saying, I thought the thyroid was in my neck. But what do I know, I'm no doctor. Anyway, this is Etsy seller Digitalsoap's latest in peripheral... | More →

OnLive promises to change the way we game by requiring no heavy-duty consoles or gaming rigs in the future, just a simple box and high-speed internet connection. The brainchild of Rearden Studios founder Steve Perlman, formerly of Atari, Apple, WebTV and more, and Mike McGarvey, formerly of Eidos, the technology looks to revolutionize the way computer games are brought home. Instead of spending hundreds... | More →

93-year old Tsutomu Yamaguchi was recently recognized as the first survivor of both the Nagasaki and Hiroshima atomic bomb droppings of 1945. Allegedly, he still pisses depleted uranium. Yamaguchi was in Hiroshima on a business trip on Aug. 6, 1945, when a U.S. B-29 dropped an atomic bomb on the city. He suffered serious burns to his upper body and spent the night in... | More →

Remember when Metroid II: Return of Samus came out for the Gameboy (1992)? I remember it like it was yesterday because I have a time machine and may or may not have stopped in the early 90's on my way back from the Jurassic era (best singles cruise EVER). Anyway, Project AM2R (Another Metroid 2 Remake) was undertaken to turn the 8-bit Gameboy game... | More →

Stephen Colbert just won a contest to have a new section of the International Space Station named after him. Unfortunately, those sticklers at NASA probably won't let it fly -- or orbit (ZING!). The name "Colbert" beat out NASA's four suggested options in the space agency's effort to have the public help name the addition. The new room will be launched later this year.... | More →

A quick-thinking Thai fireman came to the rescue recently when he dressed as Spider-Man in order to coerce an 8-year old autistic student off a high ledge. Teachers at a special needs school in Bangkok alerted authorities on Monday when an autistic pupil, scared of attending his first day at school, sat out on the third-floor ledge and refused to come inside, a police... | More →

For hot beef sundaes? I want mine with extra bacon jimmies. Hot Beef Sundae [foundshit] Thanks to tohwee, who really does love hot meat. | More →

Remember the life-like Dilophosaurus mount that Geekologie Reader Josh made? Well he's at it again, this time with a 1:1 scale velociraptor head! Up for auction is a full size replica of the Velociraptor from Jurassic Park. It measures 28 inches from the nose to base of the mount. It is made of high quality poly urethane resin that has been painted and sealed.... | More →

This is the way money looked a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away. Or, I dunno, as imagined by DeviantArt user Diablo2003. As you can see, Vader opted for a helmet-on shot, which I think we can all agree, was the smart decision. Nobody wants to see your crusty-ass rutabaga head on their space bucks! Star Bucks: Darth Vader Money [uberreview]... | More →

This is a mashup of the WALL-E trailer set to the audio of the Watchmen trailer, because, well, I don't know why. Shit, people get bored. I decided to take a crack at what many have done for other films; and set the audio from Watchmen's epic IMAX teaser to scenes from one of my favourite films of all time. So sit back, and... | More →

Rory McInnes, 18, inspired by a television program he watched about Google Earth, climbed onto his parent's roof and painted a 60-foot phallus with a bucket of white paint. It took his parents over a year to discover the monster shlong, and now Rory "will have to scrub it off when he gets back from traveling". Haha, scrub it off. But seriously, who the... | More →

Haha, just when you thought the periodic tables were beat to death with a lead pipe like the way I did that hooker zombie last night -- think again! WICKA-POW, the periodic table of controllers! Hit THIS BUTTON to see a bigger version. You know, one you can actually read. And speaking of actually reading -- I never learned. Thank God for speech recognition... | More →

I know, it's been too long since our last installment of Marie-Claude, and I'm sorry. If I could do a dance and make it rain hot cosplay everyday, believe me, I would. Unfortunately, I can't dance on these peglegs. Anyway, here is the latest from chesty Ms. Bourbonnais and photographer Gil P. As you can see, she's Frost from Mortal Kombat. And speaking of... | More →

Apparently British scientists are ahead of everyone else in the race to produce a synthetic blood supply using stem cells. Go you, Britain, here's a teacake. Because stem cells multiply indefinitely, it would be possible to enormous quantities, researchers said. The cells can be made from universal donor embryos - the O-negative type - and can be guaranteed to be free of infections because... | More →

This is 12 year old Benjamin playing the iconic song from the Mos Eisley Cantina on a harp. He's pretty good. You know, I always wanted a harp growing up but my parents were too cheap to buy me one. So to spite them, I picked up the skin-flute. *TOOT TOOT TOOT TOOTLE TOOT* Whoa, Link, what are you doing here? Youtube Thanks to... | More →

I can't even count the number of times I've been contacted by Nigerian princes to help move their money out of the country. Unfortunately, I don't keep a bank account because that's just another way the man tries to keep tabs on my brothel me on a short leash. Anyway, I like how the scammer comes out of character at the end with a... | More →

'Ghost in the Machine' is a series of artwork by Flickr user iri5 that uses old cassette tapes (or film) to create the likenesses of famous musicians/actors. Pretty clever. Not as clever as jumping off the top of the apartment building with a parachute fashioned from a 13-gallon garbage bag, but hey -- not everybody's a modern Da Vinci. GERONIMO! UPDATE: Oh God --... | More →

The latest in a line of geeky periodic tables comes the Periodic Table of XBox Games from Blackwalt (possibly of LOST fame). Full size version HERE and description of all "elements" HERE. Good looking. I hope you can appreciate it as much as I do. And also, this cake. P.S. I baked a stripper inside just for you. Be careful -- she's smokin' hot!... | More →

I know, it looks like the toy you found in your girlfriend's sock drawer, but trust me, it's not. This thing is like half that size. Thomas Benedikt went and made Admiral Ackbar's command ship Home One (not to be confused with going all the way with a lady) out of 30,500 LEGO pieces. It took 11 months to build, lays just short of... | More →

This is a video that shows, in chronological order, Batman's logo morphing over the years. It starts all the way back in 1941 with Batman with Robin, The Boy Wonder from Detective Comics. I thought it was pretty neat. So, what will the bat look like in another 70 years? If you guessed, "extinct", you're probably correct. And also, a pessimist. Look at your... | More →

The Super Nintoaster is a Super Nintendo in a toaster's body. It's similar to that time I dressed as a woman and solicited men at the bar (Friday), but nowhere near as good looking. It's maker, Mr. Vomitsaw, discusses: Built from nothing more than a Super NES, a toaster, four different types of adhesives, magnets ripped from a broken hard drive, six orange LEDs,... | More →

HBO posted these True Blood posters in New Zealand (who seems to get much cooler ads than we do) to advertise the upcoming season of the blood-sucking series starting June 2009. As you can see, each ad features several handy-dandy vampire pokers should you find yourself with some pointy-toothed bastard eying your neck on the bus. Ya best protect ya neck! And also, your... | More →

Mercury Thiocyanate used to be made into "Pharoah's Serpent" fireworks similar to the "black snake" tablets you light and watch grow into a crusty snake. Unfortunately, it produces mercury vapors during the process so now the tablets are made out of a much safer sodium bicarbonate compound. Boo, I know. Still, wicked awesome if you can get your hands on some. Which, thanks to... | More →

Responding to my request that the gamer chick pose atop a dinosaur with Link's Master Sword, Geekologie Reader Pepper sent me a picture of herself wielding said sword. Unfortunately, there's no dinosaur (just two ponies humping and a questionable computer background). Though this message contains less than 1% real dinosaur, cosplaying, action, it does contain a gamer girl with a Master Sword. ME! Win?... | More →

Remember the Terrafugia "roadable aircraft" (drivable plane)? Well it took its first test flight earlier this month, and as is evident from this video after the jump, it was boring as shit. The Terrafugly has a 450-mile flying range, converts from plane to plane that can drive in 30-seconds, and is still scheduled for sale in 2011 for about $200K. Which means your kids... | More →