Feb 11 2009Pfft, Stitches, How About A Little PEW PEW?

In an attempt to prove that not all PEWs are bad PEWs, doctors at Tel Aviv University have developed a laser that is capable of sealing wounds safer and more efficiently than traditional stitches.
The laser allows a wound to be welded shut as opposed to sutured, which makes it far more watertight and there's less tearing. It's done by very carefully controlling the temperature of the beam, and Israeli patients treated with the laser have already enjoyed faster healing times and less scarring.
Cool, but can it still blind you if you stare at it too long? And, if not, can you make me one that can? The bully that lives across the street threw a rock at me when we got off the bus yesterday, and I want to burn his eyes out. Also, his older sister is hot. I want to see her naked. PEW PEW?
Hit the jump for a video of the PEW in action.
Doctors demo Star Trek healing laser that's better than stitches [dvice]
Thanks to Ryan, who can heal the sick with a sidelong glance and kill with a direct stare.
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Reader Comments
1. Mazer - February 11, 2009 2:23 PM
I wonder i it'll leave a scar where it sutures.
2. catch22 - February 11, 2009 2:23 PM
OH BOY
3. chris - February 11, 2009 2:23 PM
first
4. Dr. Death - February 11, 2009 2:24 PM
I like lasers especially ones that burn shit
5. STINK - February 11, 2009 2:30 PM
Darth PEW PEW tends to wound rebel scum just so he can PEW them back up.
6. E of R - February 11, 2009 2:37 PM
00:06-07 Doc: Whos got the vasoline?
7. Ethan - February 11, 2009 2:41 PM
It looks like the old man in the photograph is about to superman that hoe
8. Tricky Ricky - February 11, 2009 2:45 PM
does it do tattoo removal too?
9. naas - February 11, 2009 2:47 PM
He does, the old man looks like he's about to wicky wicky the electric boogaloo.
10. Pat - February 11, 2009 2:50 PM
Lasers are used for tattoo and hair removal, but I don't know what the difference is between them (not being a medical professional). Still, cool stuff!
11. ponging-alonging - February 11, 2009 2:51 PM
Ooooh SNaaaap! Those beats are freeeeesh!!!
1 play bom, chsh bom, bom chsh
2 goto 1
12. ahha - February 11, 2009 3:11 PM
Or, if you don't have health insurance, go with the old hot poker out of the fire to seal your wounds. Chicks dig the uninsured with unsightly scarring.
13. poodles - February 11, 2009 3:22 PM
couple things,
1st, I had my face split open in a hockey game a few weeks ago, and the stitches took about 5 minutes and the procedure was extremely easy with little or no set up... THIS crap requires a big laser, some crazy metal bars, some laser surgeons and a whole bunch of unnecessary crap.. I still haven't opened my bill for the traditional stitches, I''m sure it will be expensive, but hey, it doesn't go on my credit report if I don't pay right>>? Anyway, imagine getting your laser stitches bill!?!?!?
1- Laser surgery
$4500
14. Hunter - February 11, 2009 3:25 PM
Does it double as a pew pew? Then I can finally legally change my name to Super Surgeon!!!
15. Al Dracone - February 11, 2009 3:45 PM
Where's the fun in that? You can't even see the damn beam... Besides, stitches are sexy, that is just grouse.
16. Maize - February 11, 2009 4:00 PM
This is actually fairly old technology that's been used experimentally for twenty years or so now. Controlling the heat by using gasses is, oddly enough, essentially the same kind of technology that's used in welding to adapt various forms of welding to various types of metal with different heat requirements, like aluminum. Why can't people just say, "Hey, we managed to incrementally improve something so it's somewhat more dependable now. Granted, it's not a huge leap, but that's how technology advances in small and meaningful steps". Instead they're basically taking the stance, "don't worry that we're the pot calling the ol' kettle black with terrorism and genocide. Look at the shiny laser that will help save money by letting less qualified people use it. Okay, sure the laser costs a few hundred grand and even a complete idiot who's seen an episode of ER or Macgyver can stitch someone. Look at the shiny distraction".
I've broken way too many things and had way too many stitches in my life, and I can tell you that my biggest scars are, weirdly, from stupid things like paper cuts or burning myself on the stove. Having an entire leg rebuilt with rods and screws, then stitched together with staples over the giant incision and stitches to cover the screw holes, I can tell you that the stapled wound is almost invisible across my knee and the stitches are kind of ugly. It all depends on technique and what kind of skin it is, thick or thin.
Also the gel they're using seems to help the laser diffuse before it gets to the skin, so I imagine that's a little bit of a secret they don't want to talk about yet. You know, because that's why lasers make really crappy weapons as they diffuse in water. Drink your eight glasses a day, kids.
17. Watch - February 11, 2009 4:01 PM
this is cool. the future is finally here. im interested to see what it can do to treat wounded soldiers on the battlefield. also its not a PEW PEW because it doesnt make the movie sound effects like in star wars.
18. formerly SPELLINGNAZI© - February 11, 2009 4:21 PM
@7: Ho, not hoe.
I don't get it. With stitches the skin heals together. With this, they're essentially melting skin together...I'm not really seeing how it's better.
19. $.02 and a pocket full of FAH-Q - February 11, 2009 4:27 PM
I have no issue communicating without the use of profanity. Quite frankly, the english language offers much more colorful adjectives. The point being made is simply that in this country, where this blog is hosted, we have freedom of speech. The same freedom of speech that would protect this blogger (GW) in court. I find it rather disingenuous of him to post NSFW content and genitalia jokes, then censor our comments about them.
13- Yes it goes on your credit report if you don't pay it.
18- Thank you, it really grinds on me when people attemp to insult someone by calling them a gardening tool.
Also, it's about the same difference as using superglue stitches; less scarring, less chance of infection.
Now if only we could mount these to a shark's head...
20. $.02 and a pocket full of FAH-Q - February 11, 2009 4:27 PM
*attempt
21. gsdggsdgsd - February 11, 2009 4:37 PM
0:33 wats going on?
22. Leonidas - February 11, 2009 5:15 PM
@16: play Guitar Hero much?
23. Daisy - February 11, 2009 7:10 PM
FAKE!!!!
This is a complete photoshop job. You can tell its a fake because the shadow's are all wrong.
This is exactly like that scene in the movie Never Back Down where Max was getting chased by a bunch of soldiers and hunters in the woods. He caught one of the hunters and when it turned out to be a young kid he let him live but threw his rifle away.
24. Mr. Sausage - February 11, 2009 7:55 PM
He looks a bit like Gunther von Hagens without his hat, the old geezer does.
25. DreamFolder - February 11, 2009 10:49 PM
Star Trek sure. But don't forget Logan's Run
Pew Pew
26. Kup - February 12, 2009 2:35 PM
dont know, to me it looks like the guy in blue is getting ready to shove the other dudes head into his nether regions.
" I said suck it Lars!!"