Jan 8 2009Whee: Watch Walmart Spread Like A Virus!

walmart-virus.jpg

Walmart: where else can you go drink and have shopping cart races at 3 AM? Ha, besides my underground race track? Nowhere, that's where. Now click here to watch an interactive map of Walmart's virus-like growth from 1964 to 2007. As you can see, the big-box giant has been invading America like a disease for 45 years. Just imagine: if every Walmart store was actually a giant robot. We'd all be dead as shit! Now somebody get Hollywood on the phone -- I smell an Oscar.

Watching the Growth of Walmart Across America
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via
The Andromeda Strain [splicetoday]

Thanks to Andrew, who doesn't know anything about viruses because he's clean. Ladies? Sorry Andrew, I tried.

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Reader Comments

good quality socks though.

Walmart is a f***ing zoo these days...and I think you need a minimum of 3 neck tattoos to work there.

FAKE!!!!

This is a complete photoshop job. You can tell its a fake because the shadow"s are all wrong.

This is exactly like that scene in the movie Never Back Down where Max spent a week camping out in a wal-mart.

That looks more like a map of the critters living on Daisy's cooch.

Come vote for me and I'll make it worth your while, boys.
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

@3 Short and to the point today - very good. You must have remembered to take your medication this morning.

Gee...he forgot to put up the ticker that shows how many trillions of dollars people have saved by shopping at WalMart since 1964 instead of constantly getting f***ed over by the "mom and pop" stores that charge an arm and a leg for shit that should be cheap...

Me: "$5 for a gallon of milk? Go f*** yourself mom and pop! I'm going to Wal-Mart where I can buy it for $3!"

Mom and Pop: "Wal-Mart is evil!

Pop: *whispers* "(maybe we should lower or price?)"
Mom: "Hell no! Then we wouldn't be able to bitch about anything or afford your viagra pills! Now shut up and go mark those rotten vegetables to half price!"
Pop: "Yes dear..."

@7

You are a complete and utter moron.

@2... as a tattoo artist I hope they raise the minimum to five... then I can buy more stuff at Wal-Mart!! Isn't capitalism great?!?

i love wal-mart. people with character shop there.

mom and pop, sorry but your loyal customers are to blame here, they betrayed you. they went to wal-mart.

tuff shit.

@8....

7 isn't a moron... Wal-Mart has thrived because people allowed it to. It's not hard to shut a store down. Don't shop there. But people do because they offer pretty good stuff at pretty good prices... and that satisfies a public need. That's how capitalism works.

@8

What exactly makes me a moron? Because I tell the truth? See, I give explanations about why I think the way I do. You just throw stones...

I guess you're too busy trying to convince your cousin to have a threesome with you and your mom in your step-dad's basement while he's at the welfare office to go into further clarification.

The truth is, the only time you're not trying to f*** the rest of your family is when you are busy huggin up on your step-dad's sack while your mom video tapes it.

See? I can throw stones too....

FAGGOT BITCH!

@7 yes because Walmart's low low prices didn't come at an expense to the American worker and their families. You can run a company like Henry Ford did, and pay each employee enough to afford the product you make, or you can run things like Walmart and pay all your people and the companies that sell their goods through you so little that they are forced to shop at your store. How do you think they make money charging so much less then everyone else? Do you really think other stores want their prices to be uncompetitive?

You are all literally dumb as dirt, Walmart is truly a literal gift to us hue mons. It is run so efficiently and with such attention to all of its employees' needs. You can literally walk right in there and literally walk out of there with absolutely no need to walk up there. So you literally walk in, do that thang, shake a couple hands, walk right out. You literally don't even need to pump air in the tires or shave at all. Oh yea, and mom and pop shops... They are mommy poppy and shoppy.

I just puked green. I think I have this "Walmart" virus. Oh....wait......*upchucks again* Now it's blue. Yummy!

That's scary, but pretty much the same thing can be done with any other major corporation. It sucks for the little guys, but WalMart was a little guy too at one point.

That said, I hate the store and don't shop there unless absolutely necessary.

I don't shop at walmart or go to indian casinos since thats's what everyone's so uptight about, unless I need shoelaces or an indian girl or something.

Today is a good day to start drinking right now

woa see... one too many ess's on that's..... "bartender!?"

It just goes to show you that nothing good comes out of Arkansas. What a shit hole.

@8, the walmart shoppers are right. You called 7 a moron but aren't you an Apple (computers for n00bs) fan boy? I rest my case.

Huh, I thought there were more than that...

I read something on Snopes.com that 97% of all Americans live within 25 miles of a Wal-Mart. Seems like a lot of blank spaces, though I guess that means those areas aren't populated.

IMO, Wal-Mart is awesome. Good quality at good prices. As far as competition, hey, if you can't take the heat, stay out of the kitchen. As a consumer, I want a deal...I'm not going to insist a corporate giant is getting too big and should be controlled so "Mom and Pop" can stay in business to charge more because their overhead is higher.

@17: You're a f***ing tool. "I don't shop at walmart or go to indian casinos since thats's what everyone's so uptight about..." Grow some self-awareness and do what you need/want to...you're ridiculous.

And then Skynet went online and the Wal-Marts transformed into the robots that ran the country known as "01" and inevitably resistance was futile and the B&Ls ruled what was left of the human race.

2009: When calling Wal-Mart evil has finally reached the same efficacy as associating a cop with a donut.

(Having said that, I don't shop at Wal-Mart because it's (a) too far to be worth driving to and (b) I really don't have the need to constantly buy crap.)

Wal-Mart does pay their employees lower wages, and keeps them below full time so they don't have to offer benefits... So what? how many of those same peolpe wouldn't have ANY job without Wal-Mart? That's like saying that Jiffy Lube is evil because we should all have our Oil Changes done at the dealer to keep the small companies alive... What, you don't want to pay $40 for an oil change? Oh, well, then I guess you should stop at Wal-Mart on the way home from Jiffy Lube then... hypocrisy at it's most ironic...

sick

@14

whaattttttt

makes me feel dirty just watching it

@ 3 seriously daisy that was funny oh the last five hundred times you have done it but a little old now...come up with something new for once...

wal-marts gone viral.. harhar.

FAKE!!!!

This is a complete photoshop job. You can tell its a fake because the shadow's are all wrong.

This is exactly like that scene from the movie Tender Dracula where Dracula fought his greatest enemy who was indirectly born from himself, then caught a cold.

Keep in mind that as this virus spreads through the U.S., China get richer and richer. I'm doing some work with Wake Up Walmart, and I've learned that the Bentonville behemoth gets 70% of its products from communist China. So one of those dots equal more ca$h for China.

Florida looks like my cock in that pic. Same size and everything!

I have more spots though.

You guys saying Wal-Mart saves you money are seriously retarded. Wal-Mart saves you money ON THE RECEIPT, but steals it back from your taxes. The majority of their stores are built using grants and they use loop holes to not only avoid paying taxes, but to encourage their employees to use government services for services they should be providing. The stupidity of people makes me so sad for humanity sometimes...

I'm f***ing rich.

the cancer of the world

@33 Walmart steals the savings back in taxes.......last time I checked people who DIDN'T shop at walmart had to pay taxes too. So how does that make people who DO shop there stupid?

@3; Daisy, you friggin' excuse for a person. my point it: IT IS NOT FU*KING PHOTO SHOP! AND THERE AREN'T EVEN SHADOWS!

LAST!

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