Jan 12 2009It's So Haaaaard To Say Goodbyeeeee To Yesterdaaaaaay: The Shredder Calendar
The Chrono-Shredder is a wall calendar designed by Susanna Hertrich that shreds the days as they pass. It takes a full 24-hours to shred a date, but only 10 minutes to run a dead hooker through a wood-chipper.
The Chrono-Shredder is a device that reminds us of the preciousness of our lifetime. It represents the passing of time by shredding the days of the year - printed on a paper roll - at a slow constant rate. To shred one day takes 24 hours. There is no "off"-button. As the seconds pass by, the tattered remains of the past pile up under the device...
Neat. Holler at 'ol Susanna (who cries for no one) if you can help manufacture them. Because I need one in a bad way -- I never have any idea what day it is. All I know is we've got an election coming up -- and then Jesus' birthday! WOOT!
Hit the jump for a picture of the mess the calendar makes.
The Hibernation Calendar [ryanyeah]
Thanks to Lee, who doesn't need to know what day it is because he can control time.
Related Stories
They're Coming: Space Invaders Lamp Shade (08/23/2009)
The Future Of Time Is Now: E-Ink Watches (05/19/2009)
Not A Plane: Winged Submarine Is Confused (05/18/2009)
Fire Hazards: $5,000 Paper Houses (01/20/2009)
Reader Comments
1. Daisy - January 12, 2009 10:32 AM
FAKE!!!!
This is a complete photoshop job. You can tell its a fake because the shadow's are all wrong.
This is exactly like that scene in the movie Never Back Down where Max was riding his souped up moped on Baja's front lawn. He was making circular designs reminiscent of the wheel from wheel of fortune. Baja was overcome with happiness at his expression of love. Baja's dad on the other hand wasn't.
2. Awesome - January 12, 2009 10:38 AM
Super Cool 2nd
3. Grace - January 12, 2009 10:39 AM
Vote for me and I'll do whatever you want me too!!
4. reffear - January 12, 2009 10:40 AM
Top 5!!
5. crazygeek - January 12, 2009 10:42 AM
I think it is pretty cool! I wonder if I could set it up to receive and automatically shred all of Daisy's comments? Talk about being worth its weight in gold if it could do that!
6. paineel - January 12, 2009 10:48 AM
I need this, so does Enron
7. Me - January 12, 2009 10:53 AM
Want! Need! Crave.... also.... wonder if i got my fingers stuck in it how long it would take to be shredded and/or die of bloodloss... any guinea pigs? thatl be counting your days...
8. Boost - January 12, 2009 10:55 AM
Putting a hooker in a wood chipper.
That's classic GW.
9. Ollie Williams - January 12, 2009 10:57 AM
I dig it. The fact they are printed on a single sheet and collect on the floor is a great idea. I'd buy that for a dollar!
10. Tricky Ricky - January 12, 2009 11:12 AM
Why not print the calendar on toilet paper and have it shred into a toilet..where all this crap needs to be anyways..
11. Tony - January 12, 2009 11:59 AM
This thing is on the cover of Local H's last album. Recognized it right away.
12. Tired of Daisy - January 12, 2009 12:04 PM
Daisy.. won't you just go away?
Seriously? Your comments are so old that Elvis is calling...
13. Subsannatrix - January 12, 2009 12:17 PM
want badly.
14. Thumperchica - January 12, 2009 12:20 PM
Perfect, by Christmas you'll have all of the packing material you'll need! Nevermind the giant pain in the ass pile of shredded paper acting like the perfect tinder for a fire just hanging out in your house...
15. known - January 12, 2009 12:28 PM
#12: So old that elvis is calling? Would it be any older if George Burns was calling instead?
NBD!
16. The Regal Seagull - January 12, 2009 12:37 PM
Is it possible to shred the entire year at once? You know, kind of like in real life?
17. James - January 12, 2009 12:53 PM
Anyone else disappointed when they found that the title didn't refer to a TMNT villain-themed calendar?
18. known - January 12, 2009 12:57 PM
#17: Well now until you mentioned it, it'd be nice if it was shaped like Shredders helmet & started the kitchen curtains on fire everytime it shredded something
19. Meloswizzle - January 12, 2009 1:51 PM
#12...
your comebacks are magical.
20. Spam Artist - January 12, 2009 2:15 PM
FAKE!!!!
This is a complete photoshop job. You can tell its a fake because the shadow's are all wrong.
This is almost the same as a scene from the movie Tender Dracula. One of the drunken overdubbed make up artists decides to renounce alcohol for a whole year. He celebrates by fermenting two hundred kilos of potatos in his boiler and drinking the run-off.
21. firstgold - January 12, 2009 3:05 PM
F*** all Daisy haters.
Wish I had one of these...
22. fuckfirstgold - January 12, 2009 10:45 PM
f*** you Daisy deserves every bit of hate he/she gets
23. texmex - January 13, 2009 10:14 AM
the calander is 2 years out of date
24. texmex - January 13, 2009 10:18 AM
23rd
24th
why didnt someone se this before me your all so slow
ROFL
25. texmex - January 13, 2009 10:20 AM
where would you get replacement rolls when the year is up your doomed
26. Snoodle - January 14, 2009 4:19 PM
Completely honest, I want one so damn badly.
27. groupshoes - October 21, 2009 4:21 AM
Nice airtical, i would like to tell all of my friends about it. By the way, i would like to introduce everyone of you a very nice website, it offers cheap air max trainers for men and women. Such as Air max 1, air max 2, air max 90, nike air max 2009+, air max 2010 new, nike air max TN, nike air ltd trainers, air max 95. Dunk SB shoes, nike shox shoes. You can find almost all the nike series there, in huge collection and varies colorways. They have Latest style and classic style. Though their price are low, don't worry about it's quality. They are realll ones!!! I have bought from them for so many times, and very satisfied with the their goods and service. Come on, you'll love it.