Jan 23 2009Help Prevent Carpal Tunnel With Awethumb!
This video is chock-full of slanderous lies and half-truths about the dangers of texting in an attempt to sell you little plastic thimbles to slip on your thumbs when using your cell phone. I'm only posting it because 1. I can't believe these pieces of shit and 2. I just love hearing the guy say "AWETHUMB!", particularly at 0:22 and the very end. $11.50 gets you "2 Small & 2 Large Awethumbs and a Microfiber Storage Pouch that Doubles as a Cleaning Cloth". $18.50 gets you everything mentioned above and an Awethumb handjob.
Product Page
Thanks to Mother B, who doesn't need Awethumbs, because they're stupid.
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Reader Comments
1. Dr.Known - January 23, 2009 10:02 AM
FRIDAAAAY finally
2. softlicious - January 23, 2009 10:02 AM
FIRST!!!!!!!!
3. Dr.Known - January 23, 2009 10:05 AM
Saying this products name is gheyer than a firstard with cum on his mustache trying to get into the blue oyster bar through the back alley entrance
nBd
4. softlicious - January 23, 2009 10:08 AM
dang it!
I hate theese stupid idiots, if you want to write some long text messages save it until you get home to your real computer that has a real keyboard. Theese stupid brats take there iphone or whatever the f*** that is and then they crouch into some f***ing unaccommodating hole like a f***ing cockroach and they sit there with their fancy faggy iphones and text gay text messages.
5. Cameron - January 23, 2009 10:08 AM
@3. Dr.Known - I disagree, and frankly I am offended that you would say that, because I think this product is truly awethumb, and it's not fair of you to make fun of such an innovative and clearly awethumb product. You're the #1 prick, and you can only wish you were half as awethumb as I am.
6. Ollie Williams - January 23, 2009 10:10 AM
I laughed every time he said "awethumb".
7. Barking Bud - January 23, 2009 10:10 AM
AWEdumb.
8. softlicious - January 23, 2009 10:13 AM
It's a known fact that Dr.Known has cum on his mustache.
9. Dr.Known - January 23, 2009 10:17 AM
#5 I don't care because you'll get over it, don't be that ghey. This is almost as annoying as a free credit report commercial. Not only do you look like a gimp wearing those dorky little thimbles, but thinking you're going to type faster on a pda with them is as lame as softlicious using the word 'dang' all the time
10. NastyBedazzler - January 23, 2009 10:24 AM
Who wants to join me in a class action lawsuit? This ad is full of bullshit.
11. Thumperchica - January 23, 2009 10:27 AM
@Doc - Yes, yes it is Friday... and I just found out I need to come in tomorrow afternoon as well... >=( So now Lady Friday can lick Superior Saturday's taint.
@4 - Angry Much?
@5 - That was awethumb. I can't even watch the vid, but now all day I will feel the need to say "awethumb" and I sincerely thank you for that!
12. softlicious - January 23, 2009 10:27 AM
FAG!
The guy is a total fag, you can tell that because he doesn't have the shadow of a clue. If you want to write text you should use a keyboard, yeas you should use your computer not some small piece of shit. His brain is a total photoshop job.
This is just like in that movie Never Bend Down where Max dropped his soap in the shower, he bent down to pick it up, but then Baja come from behind. Max didn't mind because he's a liberal Apple brat, so Max got Baja's phone number. Later Max sent a message to his boyfriend, unfortunately that gave him awethumbs.
13. Thumperchica - January 23, 2009 10:29 AM
12 - You have pudgy sausage fingers don't you? That would explain the text hating...
14. butterbee - January 23, 2009 10:29 AM
Thats.... neat!
@4 iPhones are really easy to text on. I started using proper capitalization and punctuation once I got mine (to the best of my ability). iPhone haters need to relax, use awethumb. I'm not sure this would work on an iPhone, however. How do iPhones sense touch? Conductivity? Pressure? Optically?
15. naas - January 23, 2009 10:39 AM
lol those are gay. who complains about sore thumbs from txting anyways???
16. Jesse Starr - January 23, 2009 10:43 AM
I looked up all of the sites that these guys are using for their quotes on the Awethumb website...
Dyscern.com - can't locate the article using their search engine.
Engadget.com - is clearly making fun of the product in the review from which they grabbed the quote “Awethumb is amaathing! . . the Awethumb is all too real -- and all too freaking amazing”.. It's blatant sarcasm from start to finish.
Obsessable.com - This review gives it a chance but ultimately says that it's lame unless you are an old person who can't use your thumbs properly and even then it "performed adequately" and that "the feeling was extremely odd and different".
Blackberryinsight.com - The quote is the title of the article from which it came and that article is nothing but a few quotes from the Awethumb website copied and pasted. No one even bothered to write a review.
17. Cameron - January 23, 2009 10:44 AM
@11. Thumperchica - Anything for you my love.
18. Daisy - January 23, 2009 10:55 AM
FAKE!!!!
This is a complete photoshop job. You can tell its a fake because the shadow's are all wrong.
This is exactly like that scene in the movie Never Back Down where Max was playing on his brand new Nintendo game system and he hit his puppy in the face with the controller while tring to bowl a perfect game. Then his neighbor Honey Bunz came over and brought the dog back to life using mouth to nose Wiisuscitation.
19. Famous Television Actor - January 23, 2009 10:57 AM
I am a famous television actor and I endorse this product.
I am not a famous television actor, I just play one on T.V.
20. JK - January 23, 2009 10:58 AM
well, doesn't beat "Air Guitar Strings" but close
21. Moose Knuckle - January 23, 2009 10:58 AM
They should make a brace for your wrist and call it "SPANKTACULAR"!
22. bar room hero - January 23, 2009 11:08 AM
bootleg
23. vandeg - January 23, 2009 11:18 AM
doubt its ergonomic, since your still moving your thumbs. Not to mention impact on your thumbs? Have you heard anyone say, "OMG I sprained my thumb!" Yeah...
buy'em and type to fictory!
24. Dylan - January 23, 2009 11:21 AM
If I ever see someone with one of those texting ill f***ing kill them.
25. Hunter - January 23, 2009 11:38 AM
Unleash the power of your PDA!!!!!
26. Amaranth - January 23, 2009 11:56 AM
This would sell better if it had a vibrating tip for multi purpose
27. Spam Artist - January 23, 2009 11:56 AM
FAKE!!!!
This is a complete photoshop job. You can tell its fake because the shadow's are all wrong.
This is exactly like that scene in the movie Tender Dracula where Dracula's resurrected man servant takes up reading as a hobby. He joins a book club and spends much of his summer enjoying the classics on train rides throughout Bavaria.
28. Dr.Known - January 23, 2009 12:09 PM
#11 Sorry to hear about that schedule AND the mandatory taint licking. Actually that's doesn't sound too bad for work, unless Superior Saturday doesn't clean down there.
Haha the comments in this section are great except for spam artist, I never read those NBD
29. Daisy - January 23, 2009 12:24 PM
FAKE!!!!
This is a complete photoshop job. You can tell its a fake because the shadow's are all wrong.
This is exactly like that scene in the movie Never Back Down where Max became unstuck in time and would drift back and forth between events in his life.
30. Daisy - January 23, 2009 12:44 PM
FAKE!!!!
This is a complete photoshop job. You can tell its a fake because the shadow's are all wrong.
This is exactly like that scene in the movie Never back down where Max told Spam Artist to stop copying his schtick you dumb bastard!
31. DJ_Bladdered - January 23, 2009 3:26 PM
Hey, dig the damn funky jazz rock riffin' that makes the dope product FLYYYYY
AWETHUMB - The Original Soundtrack
Currently outselling AWETHUMB at a rate of 500 to zero
32. Beastman AIDS - January 24, 2009 1:01 AM
holycrap - it's about time they invented a product to "reduce the impact" of txting! I've shattered three philanges in the last 2 months as a result of my furious tactile attacks
33. firstgold - January 24, 2009 1:17 PM
"This is exactly like that scene in the movie Never back down where Max told Spam Artist to stop copying his schtick you dumb bastard!"
Agreed.
34. Ryan - January 24, 2009 7:08 PM
Thaf Awethumb!
35. Jeffbox - January 27, 2009 9:56 PM
These are just aweful.
36. Honestly? - January 30, 2009 3:32 AM
I NEED AWETHUMB!
No really. I need it tho badly. There just ain't enough awethumb in my life right now.
Also, did anyone else enjoy the whole "stor[ing] awethumb in your pocket" thing?
Ready for when you need to whip it out and pwn somebody...
37. jackery - February 5, 2009 11:55 AM
lmao "unleash the power of your pda !" what a gronk the only thing youll gain from buying/using them is a sound beating ahaha awethumb...
38. Luft - April 10, 2009 1:40 AM
UNLEASH THE POWER!
...
just...
wow.
39. Victoria Downey - July 21, 2009 9:56 PM
dumb asses...
stupid whores...