This is a video of some computer porn. Like computer porn in the truest sense: computer parts getting it on with one another. It really didn't do much for me, but that's probably because it's super softcore compared to a lot of the other stuff I've seen. Haha, you know what I'm talking about -- that real quadcore shit. Youtube Thanks to Nick, who... | More →

Did you know Barack Obama collected Spider-Man comics? I didn't. But since he is such a big fan, Marvel artists have decided to feature Barack in a special inaugural issue. Mr Obama's fan status was revealed by his campaign team, who released 10 little-known facts about the Democrat. "Right at the top of that list was he collected Spider-Man comics" In the six-page story,... | More →

CLICK HERE FOR FULL SIZE IMAGE Remember the new presidential limo that Cadillac designed to be PEW PEW proof? Well it's been approved for use starting January 20th and is jam-packed with all kinds of exciting features like extra presidential blood (I'm not kidding) and 8-inch thick (me too, ladies) doors that weigh as much as a 757's cabin door. I thought it was... | More →

TURN YOUR SPEAKERS DOWN, SERIOUSLY. This is a video of some kid getting wiidiculous after he opens a Wii on Christmas. And let me tell you: based on his behavior, I would have taken that shit right back to the store. But in all seriousness kid, your parents don't love you. Don't believe me? Where was your Wii on Christmas 2006? 2007? Exactly. NOTE:... | More →

President-elect Barack Obama requested Congress extend the analog television cut-off date because inadequate funding and flaws in the converter box program. You know, because a bunch of people are stupid. And dumb. Mad dumb. John Podesta, co-chair of the Obama-Biden transition team, requested that "the cut-off date (February 17th) for analog signals should be reconsidered and extended". The letter was sent this Thursday to... | More →

Doctor Richard Batista married his wife Dawnell in 1990 and donated a kidney to save her life in 2001. Since then, the whore of a hobag cheated on him and filed for divorce. And now Richard, like any normal person, wants his freaking kidney back (or $1.5 million in compensation). He told reporters at his lawyer's office in Long Island, New York, that going... | More →

The Toilet Scale was designed by Haikun Deng so you can weigh yourself while using the john. Personally, I like to sit down while I pee. I'm not sure why I just shared that. Anway, the only problem is you have to make sure your feet aren't touching the ground while it's weighing, or it won't work. So you have to kick your legs... | More →

Burger King has developed a Facebook application called Whopper Sacrifice that rewards users for deleting friends. You just delete 10 friends from Facebook, and TA-DA -- a coupon for a free Whopper. Unfortunately, the deal only works once per Facebook account and makes you look like a heartless dickbag with a turd for a heart that sucks at life because you'd trade your friendship... | More →

This is a German commercial for something I have no idea what is (saturn.de?) that shows the evolution of technology in robotic form. It confused me in my pants. I definitely felt a little twitter at the part with the t-rex, but the rest of it just scared me. And the chick from Tron at the end? Fine, I'll admit it: boner. It was... | More →

HangUP Arcade Coat Hooks by Surface Tension are made out of real arcade joysticks and buttons and conveniently store your coat or jacket up and out of bong's way. Coming sometime early this year, they'll be available in 3UP and 4UP versions. You can pick your own joystick ball colors too. The standard models will ship in black walnut wood, but they're happy to... | More →

The Japan Aerospace Exploration Agency (JAXA) believe they've solved the age-old problem of how to shit in space. The current ISS toilet is a Russian-built, western-style commode that sucks waste away like a vacuum cleaner. Use of that toilet requires practice before heading to space, particularly because an improperly seated user has the potential to create a messy situation. Clean and easy to use,... | More →

And that, dear reader, is how I became The Geekologie Writer. Youtube Thanks to Tim, whose special skills aren't just limited to a 20-inch dong. | More →

Gunnar glasses ($100 - $189!!!!!!!!!!) come in cleverly named styles like Bit Surfer, Wi-Five and El Doucherino, and are supposed to prevent the eye fatigue caused by blogging eight hours a day. That's right ladies and gentlemen....prepare to experience "Enhanced Computer Vision". Ever wonder why your eyes get tired after staring at a PC screen for hours? Gunnar says it's because of the LCD... | More →

That's right folks, Wii Sports is now the best-selling video game ever. And not just because it comes bundled with the Wii, but 100% because it comes bundled with the Wii. Shocked? Don't be. Unlike most video games that can be bought at retail, Wii Sports comes bundled with the Wii hardware in every territory other than Japan and Korea. In other words, if... | More →

Now THAT'S what I call a freaking cake. This massive firebreathing bitch was made for some Dungeon & Dragoners for a very special feast. A feast which included, but was not limited to: mozzarella sticks and corn dogs (see gallery after jump). Now that's what I call eating like a king. Or a handsome prince! HIYO. Anyway, this amazing piece of delicious was made... | More →

I didn't really like Anchorman, but that's neither here nor there. Now you can buy officially licensed Sex Panther cologne from the movie for only $30 per 1.7-oz spray bottle. No word if it's made with real panther bits or smells like gasoline, but if I had to guess, I'd say wear Old Spice. You'll remind women of their grandfathers. And that, dear reader,... | More →

Allegedly this is the world's smallest automatic weapon. I'm pretty sure it's just some sort of automatic handgun with a monster drum magazine, but what do I know -- I'm just a guy who gets a boner holding a BB gun. Youtube Thanks to Andrew, who once brought a knife to a gunfight and stabbed everyone to death. Also, thanks to my brother, who... | More →

Walmart: where else can you go drink and have shopping cart races at 3 AM? Ha, besides my underground race track? Nowhere, that's where. Now click here to watch an interactive map of Walmart's virus-like growth from 1964 to 2007. As you can see, the big-box giant has been invading America like a disease for 45 years. Just imagine: if every Walmart store was... | More →

Oh yeah, a toy that teaches you how to utilize 'The Force'. You know, from Star Wars. The Force Trainer (expected to be priced at $90 to $100) comes with a headset that uses brain waves to allow players to manipulate a sphere within a clear 10-inch-tall training tower, analogous to Yoda and Luke Skywalker's abilities in the Star Wars films. First of all,... | More →

A six-year old (possibly Lil Derrick) missed the school bus and did what any responsible, education-loving tyke would do -- stole his parents' 2005 Ford Taurus and drive his damn self. It almost brings a tear to my eye. Almost. Super villains don't cry though. I ain't no little bitch! He made at least two 90-degree turns, passed several cars and ran off the... | More →

Deviantartist sadwonderland went and made a steampunk styled wristwatch. While it doesn't look super steampunky, I still like the style. Hell, I'd wear it if I was a woman. Or, haha, home alone with the door locked and shades pulled tight. I'm not kidding. This is a fancy steampunk-style wristwatch, fully functioning, with a new battery in it all ready to go! A pair... | More →

This is allegedly the most complained about commercial of 2008. It's an Australian ad for Kotex U brand tampons. And, despite all feminine hygiene commercials making me die a little bit inside, I didn't think it was that bad. Youtube Thanks to Julian for reminded me that Summer's Eve commercials are, in fact, totally awesome.... | More →

Motorola unveiled what is believed to be the first carbon neutral (and sideways) cell phone at the 2009 Consumer Electronics Show this week. The W233 Renew Phone is made predominately out of recycled plastic bottles and Motorola hopes it will help the company bust a circuit all up in the environmentally friendly market segment. Motorola said it was the world's first carbon neutral phone.... | More →

Somebody went and stole a robot! Can you believe it? That's just wrong! I am outraged. The Washington County (Oregon) Sheriff's Office said physics professor Erik Sanchez reported the theft Monday. He said he felt sick Sunday and mistakenly left his sport utility vehicle unlocked overnight with the robot inside outside his home in the 6000 block of S.W. 205th Ave. in Aloha. The... | More →

Remember the last time I announced a casting call for a show? Did any of you actually apply? Is 'Super Testing' on the air? Has it started yet? I have no idea, I only watch educational programming. Sexeducational programming. HIYO! Porn basically. Anyway, here's the chance for you Geekologie readers to prove yourselves, and show the billions of [fact check this] Discovery Networks Science... | More →

Remember last week's MP5 Wiimote-gun mod? Well here comes another -- this time in the form of a Desert Eagle. Unlike the MP, the Wiimote hasn't actually been incorporated into the gun itself, but a holster for the Wiimote has been professionally novicely glued to the bottom. DESERT EAGLE WITH OFFICIAL MARKINGS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THIS IS A CUSTOM Wii GUN I'VE MADE MYSELF............... IT WORKS GREAT... | More →

As you may know, we love themed cakes here at Geekologie. Love them, love them. A lot. I mean we REALLY love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love them. I guess what I'm getting at is this: I got a little too drunk and had relations... | More →

In this video, somebody awesome dressed up as Darth Vader and joined the procession of the Clergy of the Lutheran Church of Iceland. You can see a couple of the members none too happy about Darth's appearance around the 0:15 mark. Sadly, they were powerless to do anything. Which proves my theory -- even God is a little wary of Vader's force-choke. Hit the... | More →

That ain't right. You can't just go around setting a man's penis on fire while he's sleeping. I mean, what if he bee-lines it for the curtains? Rajini Narayan, 44, is alleged to have doused her husband, Satish, with a flammable liquid while he was sleeping. When she set him alight, Mr Narayan jumped out of bed and knocked over the substance, causing the... | More →

Good afternoon my delicate flowers. The MacWorld keynote ended not too long ago and I am here to report the highlights of said keyish note. Unfortunately, most of the news was boring and made me flaccid. iLife '09: iPhoto, face recognition for pictures, GPS geotagging, *yawn*, sorting options. New version of iMovie, new editing options, advanced drag-and-drop, free porn, themes. Garageband '09: new interface,... | More →

Tokyoflash's first design of 2009, the R75, is now available, and you have the Geekologie Writer's personal guarantee it will get you laid.* How could it not -- it comes in three different colors, including gold! Like my teeth! It can also tell time in there different modes! F*** I'm excited! Hour-centric mode displays the hour in digits on the lower display and minutes... | More →

Well folks, MacWorld begins today and everyone some people are excited to see if Apple drops some technology bombs on the world. And boy are they! Just check out the latest in their MacBook series -- the Macbook Wheel. It replaces that pesky keyboard with a touch-friendly iPod wheel. Whee! Wheel! Note: For you paint-chippers out there this is fake and the video was... | More →

Alfred Shaheen, inventor of the Hawaiian shirt, has passed away. He was 86. "Before Shaheen came along, there was no Hawaii garment industry. There were mom and pop stores but no real modern industry," Linda Arthur, a professor of textiles and clothing at Washington State University said. By 1959, the year Hawaii became a state, he had more than 400 employees working for him... | More →

Remember how Doc Brown had modded the Delorean in Back To The Future II to run on garbage? Well now you can do the same -- and you don't even need a Delorean (although that would help with style points, see picture above)! All you need is to throw a gasifier up in your whip. Gasification is the use of heat to transform solid... | More →

Some guy went and decked out his rumpus room XBox 360 style. It has everything an XBox fan would need to game their life away, including, and pretty much limited to: an Xbox 360, green paint, and a mini-fridge. This is my Xbox 360 Room I have been working on. TV, Xbox 360, TV Table, Surround Sound=$3000 Led's,Led Driver,Led Dimming switch = $ 170... | More →

Well folks, it's official: VHS is dead. Let your grandparents down easy. And also, try to hint about fumigating their place -- it smells like old people and socks in there. Even though most of us probably thought it was already long gone, its death certificate was signed when Distribution Video Audio of Palm Harbor, Fla. -- the last major supplier of VHS tapes... | More →

Knock-offs: they look like the real thing, but are bought out of the back of a skeezy guy's van for a quarter of the price and either break or explode within a week of purchase. Then, to make matters worse, the bastard isn't set up on the same street corner when you go to return the merchandise. What a sham! And speaking of which,... | More →

Let's face it, women find nothing hotter than kissing a man whose breath smells like bacon. It not only indicates great wealth, but a refined palate and good sense of meat. So, before your next match of tonsil tennis, how about hitting a few bacon balls? Two 22-balled tins will set you back $7. Alternatively, this 3-balled ten will set you back $40 (extra... | More →

So apparently there's this little jellyfish creature (Turritopsis nutricula, a form of hydrozoa) that doesn't ever die. Biology is beyond me, so I'll let somebody else do the talking while I make a sandwich have a sandwich made for me. What these little folks do is they revert completely to a sexually immature, colonial stage after they reach sexual maturity. They're even cooler than... | More →

The Ozone is a conceptual hydrogen fuel cell vehicle that looks like a coffee can. I can only assume it's the brainchild of a design student that stayed up all night snorting Adderall the day before their semester-project was due. The vehicle works on hydrogen powered fuel cells and looks futuristic in every way possible. The body is encased between two giant wheels controlled... | More →

Just in case you were curious, that's it. :O Google Maps Thanks to TetterkeT for reminding me I passed out on the football field that night. Haha, the visiting team drew on my face with Sharpie! | More →

Erwin Wurm is the artist responsible for making this series of 'fat cars'. Similarly, Ronald McDonald, Wendy and The Burger King are the artists responsible for making my series of 'fat ex-girlfriends'. Hit the jump for three more obese autos. | More →

High atop the snow-covered peak of Everfrost Mountain the elves brew a wicked batch of grog -- a grog so powerful it can etch diamonds and make a Goron's pee burn. I'm telling you, that stuff will even put hair on an infant's chest. It's true, look at my newborn. Just kidding, that's a Furby. Anyway, this is a LEGO brewpub built by a... | More →

This is a conceptual Nokia gun phone made by somebody in Photoshop. It's fake. Mad fake. Faker than the ID I use to buy booze (I'm 16). Because no phone company has the gigantor cojones it would take to manufacture an actual handgun-phone. And I think we can all agree, that's a fundamental problem with today's society. That's why I outsourced the manufacture of... | More →