Dec 19 2008Ho Ho Ho, Happy Holidays From Geekologie

santa-art.jpg

Julian Beever is a sidewalk artist that specializes in realistic 3-D renderings when viewed from a particular viewpoint. This is one such piece, and Christmas themed to boot. Who knew Santa lived in a secret underground lair beneath a mail receptacle? That's some serious DangerMouse shit right there. And, based on the expression on Santa's face, I'd say somebody just asked for ass beads.


Julian's Official Site

Related Stories
Reader Comments

frist1

Is he mailing his baby?

And why does Santa have "blow-up doll face"?

this guy is almost as good as me...no seriously...

I've seen these before. Yeah they are pretty cool. But you know what you never see. Nobody ever takes a picture of these from the wrong angle. If you look at it from the wrong angle, its totally bizzare.

I challenge someone to post a picture of one from the wrong angle.

You have been challenged.

Heck, MooseKnucle has been challenged his whole life.

I really love these! Would love to see one in person. If I do, I will definitely get a bad angle shot and post it!


http://internetmiscellanea.blogspot.com/

Someone should get video surveillance on that area. See how many stoned people attempt jumping over the art.

Who doesn't love Dangermouse.

Santa Just read my letter, you can tell by the facial expression...

challenge met
go to his website DEWD
theres a bunch from the wrong angle and theyre super distorted
thats wat she said

oh shits that was @5

THE ARTIST IS ON SKYNET!!!!!!!!!!!!

@3 HAHAHA!

You don't mail babies? Oops...

pretty kewl stuff brah

@10. You kind of met the challenge. You didn't post it, you found it posted. That's cool. At least now I took the time to look at all his work. Cool stuff.

heh heh, he said Beever.

wow

its been about two hours since this was posted and daisy hasn't said shit... has she finally been laid?

FAKE!!!!

This is a complete photoshop job. You can tellits a fake because the shadow's are all wrong.

This is exactly like that scene from the movie Never Back Down where Baja's red nose makes her the laughingstock of the school. Then one day the fog was so thick the bus couldn't get the kids home, so Baja walked in front of it with her nose for a light. The kids were home safe for christmas holiday and Baja and her red nose were very popular from then on.

@17

Nope!

SHIT, I THINK I JINXED THE POST

Santa lives in hell?

Happy Holiday, enjoy your time :)

ohhhhh

Nice :)

Looks like he's going to drop the baby into Santa's lair as a sacrifice.
At least the baby thinks so...

@21 - judging by the mailbox thats england, so I guess so.

I bet that thing goes so fast!!

DangerDOOM is the bee's knees, he is the wasp's nipples. He is, I would go so far as to say, the entire set of erogenous zones of every major flying insect of the Western world.

@5

http://polizeros.com/wp-content/uploads/2006/03/julian-beever.jpg

@28 good job! That was my favorite obscure picture too!

BTW, whats up GW?!?! Four posts today? I had to work a full schedule, it's not Christmas Eve or anything. I needed my fix and got left hanging today.

This kind of creeps me out. Now all I can think of is fat men in red suits lurking under every street corner.

Why doesn't anyone tell Daisy the scenes she describes in Never Back Down are fake?

Wow, that kid looks terrified.

- There are 2 billion children (persons under 18) in the world. BUT since Santa doesn't (appear) to handle the Muslim, Hindu, Jewish and Buddhist children, that reduces the workload to 15% of the total -- 378 million according to Population Reference Bureau.

- At an average (census)rate of 3.5 children per household, that's 91.8 million homes. One presumes there's at least one good child in each.

- Santa has 31 hours of Christmas to work with, thanks to the different time zones and the rotation of the earth, assuming he travels east to west(which seems logical).

- This works out to 822.6 visits per second. This is to say that for each Christian household with good children, Santa has 1/1000th of a second to park, hop out of the sleigh, jump down the chimney, fill the stockings, distribute the remaining presents under the tree, eat whatever snacks have been left, get back up the chimney, get back into the sleigh and move on to the next house.

- Assuming that each of these 91.8 million stops are evenly distributed around the earth (which, of course, we know to be false but for the purposes of our calculations we will accept), we are now talking about .78 miles per household, a total trip of 75-1/2 million miles, not counting stops to do what most of us must do at least once every 31 hours, plus feeding and etc.

- This means that Santa's sleigh is moving at 650 miles per second, 3,000 times the speed of sound. For purposes of comparison, the fastest man-made vehicle on earth, the Ulysses space probe, moves at a poky 27.4 miles per second -- a conventional reindeer can run, tops, 15 miles per hour.

- The payload on the sleigh adds another interesting element. Assuming that each child gets nothing more than a medium-sized lego set (2 pounds), the sleigh is carrying 321,300 tons, not counting Santa, who is invariably described as overweight.

- On land, conventional reindeer can pull no more than 300 pounds. Even granting that "flying reindeer" could pull TEN TIMES the normal anoint, we cannot do the job with eight, or even nine. We need 214,200 reindeer.

- This increases the payload - not even counting the weight of the sleigh -- to 353,430 tons. Again, for comparison -- this is four times the weight of the Queen Elizabeth.

- 353,000 tons traveling at 650 miles per second creates enormous air resistance -- this will heat the reindeer up in the same fashion as spacecrafts re-entering the earth's atmosphere. The lead pair of reindeer will absorb 14.3 QUINTILLION joules of energy. Per second. Each. In short, they will burst into flame almost instantaneously, exposing the reindeer behind them, and create deafening sonic booms in their wake. The entire reindeer team will be vaporized within 4.26 thousandths of a second.

- Santa, meanwhile, will be subjected to centrifugal forces 17,500.06 times greater than gravity. A 250-pound Santa (which seems ludicrously slim)would be pinned to the back of his sleigh by 4,315,015 pounds of force.

Merry Christmas, GEEKS!

REAL!!!!

Saint Nicholas is real. The shadows are all right.

It is commonly misunderstood that he would waste his time visiting the unseemly parts of the world, hundreds of years after his death.

To learn the truth, one can view a scene in the film Tender Dracula.
Therein Dracula will illustrate the merits of a peaceful and loving life, devoid
of imagined horrors, as the real horrors of life are far too plentiful.

Merry Christmas, and Never Back Down!

did anyone even read what 33 said? if you did could you post it but summarized down to like a sentence so no one has to waste all that time reading what 33 wrote

@35

oh im sure you can take a few minutes to read it you lazy person!

@33 & 34 you gay fags shut the f*** up!

@33 - but you forget, its magic. So Santa isn't bound by the constraints you mention.

@33, you ruined Christmas!!

@33: Are you saying... Santa doesn't exist? You're not saying that, right?

35: too funny and so true

35: Obviously, we think in Santa in Human terms but reading those facts, "he" seem to come from a parallel dimension with different space and time rules, that would be my theory but cannot conclude anything till this is properly tested in scientifically ways such as, show up in the TV show "Mythbusters"

WHY DOES THE CANDLE HAS A SHADOW?!!!!
WHY DOES THE CANDLE HAS A SHADOW?!!!!
WHY DOES THE CANDLE HAS A SHADOW?!!!!
WHY DOES THE CANDLE HAS A SHADOW?!!!!

That guy looks like he just stole the kid! Santa's reading the ransome note!

Candles have shadows because you can't f*** your wife, who uses a candle instead of a vibrator.

This is no place to shut up. If this was a place to shut up or if you want this place to shut up. Shut the comments box f*** up.

Santa is fake, St. Stan is Loss. Gravity sucks, so do black holes.
Nothing sucks like an Electrolux.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Electrolux

Why does the candle have a spare tire?

The shadow is the shadow of the handle. But it really doesn't need a spare tire.

FAKE!!!!

This is a complete photoshop job. You can tell it's a fake because the shadows are all wrong.

This is exactly like that scene from the movie Never Back Down where Baja's red nose makes her the laughingstock of the school. Then one day the fog was so thick the bus couldn't get the kids home, so Baja walked in front of it with her nose for a light. The kids were home safe for christmas holiday and Baja and her red nose were very popular from then on.

when is the geekologie writer going to post more stuff?

@45 you gay fag shut the f*** up!

within that senseless rant from #45 I do agree that gravity does suck

first banksy now this guy... what is it with britain and people that like to draw stuff on sidewalks

T-minus three seconds to baby spike!

I'm playing with my own feces!

Yeah wheres GW? he hasnt posted in AGES

I'm having Geekologie withdraws....

@ 27. Griswold Goodsoup:
Nice Hitchhiker's Guide reference there. Bet you thought none of us would spot that you were pirating Douglas Adams's material? Well, I see what you did there!

@33 - You were the kid to tell your friends in 2nd grade that Santa and the Easter Bunny aren't real, huh?
It's the spirit of the season and a belief in the possibility of magic that matters more. JackAss.

Duckula was way better than DangerMouse. BLAHHAHAHAHAHA!

2, i don't think from the kid's expression he's mailing his baby. he looks more like he's going to sell someone else's baby to santa. or maybe trade for presents? how did he know santa eats babies? it's a secret!

give me Art photo

.

/nice art.

wounder art ............. i agree your emagination is boundles

good job ............................................
carry on......coungratulation

wounder art ............. i agree your emagination is boundles

good job ............................................
carry on......coungratulation

Post a Comment

Please keep your comments relevant to the post. Inappropriate or promotional comments may be removed. Email addresses are required to confirm comments but will never be displayed. To create a link, simply type the URL (including http://) or email address. You can put up to 3 URLs in your comments.