Nov 12 2008WMDs: Death By Great Flaming Balls
So the Pentagon is employing a new weapon in the fight against WMDs. Namely, giant flaming balls (aka rocket balls).
These are hollow spheres, made of rubberized rocket fuel; when ignited, they propel themselves around at random at high speed, bouncing off the walls and breaking through doors, turning the entire building into an inferno. The makers call them "kinetic fireball incendiaries." The Pentagon doesn't want to talk about them, but published documents show that the fireballs have undergone tests on underground bunkers.
WTF!? Suffice it to say the Indiana Jones franchise would have ended 15 minutes into Raiders of the Lost Ark if the ancient Peruvians had employed a rocket ball instead of a giant freaking rock.
Click the article for a much longer explanation of the the weapons.
Secret Rocket Balls Target WMD Bunkers [wired]
Thanks to 42 y/o undead warlock, who even giant flaming balls can't kill.
Related Stories
Spike Chair Is Ultra-Scary, Not Worth The Risk (05/05/2009)
I'd Rather Just Die: Alleged 'Rescue' Robot (03/02/2009)
PEW PEW: Cops' New Non-Lethal Weaponry (12/29/2008)
Reader Comments
1. Davo - November 12, 2008 1:51 PM
first?
2. Firsty Mcfirsty - November 12, 2008 1:51 PM
firsty!!!!
3. Secondy Mcsecondy - November 12, 2008 1:52 PM
second!!!
4. Davo - November 12, 2008 1:53 PM
I had something like this happen, but it was explosive diarrhea and it totally destroyed my underground plumbing. Nothing survived.
5. Damn Mcdamn - November 12, 2008 1:53 PM
Damn
6. Ash - November 12, 2008 1:53 PM
My neighbor has flaming balls he tried to set them loose in my house so I put Never back down in my dvd player and he ran screaming.
7. Moose Knuckle - November 12, 2008 1:57 PM
A coworker of mine had balls of flame, the doctor gave him an ointment and told him to stay away from the skanks. Just kidding, it was me he told, and it wasn't balls of flame it was BALLS OF FURY. And, yes, my training was completed, I do have a backhand.
pew
8. LSDiesel - November 12, 2008 2:01 PM
@4, nice.
The closer life gets to being like Dragonball Z, the happier of a person I become.
9. Thumperchica - November 12, 2008 2:05 PM
Goodness, gracious, great balls of WTF!!!!!!!!!!!
10. Thumperchica - November 12, 2008 2:06 PM
DAMNIT1 i just read the tags, GW beat me to it... *hangs head in 2nd person to make lame pun shame*
11. asiantom - November 12, 2008 2:09 PM
One step close to the Pulse Rifle in HL2.
12. cuntiflaps - November 12, 2008 2:19 PM
And this is the delivery method
http://www.halolz.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/11/pewpewpew.jpg
PEW¾
13. Amy - November 12, 2008 2:40 PM
Woo, fantastic, yet another outrageously overpowered weapon designed to allow the U.S. to whack off in the face of every other civilized nation. "'Course we can be jerks to whoever we want, we haff controlled fire! Whatcher gone do 'bout it, yee-hay!"
14. Vladeon - November 12, 2008 2:49 PM
Is it just me or does this sound incredibly inefficient so long as you can't really control the direction that it shoots towards. It seems to me that there's a good chance that it might just shoot backwards toward your face. Just a thought. Not to mention you could just shoot (congrats go to me for saying "shoot" four times in consecutive sentences, my old english teacher would be proud) a good old daisy cutter in there and suffocate whoever's in the underground bunker.
15. Atrides - November 12, 2008 3:13 PM
Didn't this thing cause the '77 New York City Blackout?
16. Daisy - November 12, 2008 3:18 PM
FAKE!!!!
This is an obvious potoshop job. You can tell its fake because the shadows are all wrong.
This kinda looks like a scene fom the movie Never Back Down. You know, the one where Max tried to dig a tunnel to China, but came upon a secret underground chamber, and ate a fir flower gained stature and was able to shoot firey balls.
17. Benjamin Tudino - November 12, 2008 3:25 PM
@13 - I suppose you'd prefer that America not have any weapons, and all nations can live in peace on this big groovy planet together? The only problem with that is the eventual outcome of this is that all nations will become equal. But it doesn't mean the other countries will raise themselves to America's level, rather, they will all drag us down to the level of some 3rd world shit hole.
I guess it will be worth it though, because the rest of the world won't fear us any longer.
18. Brittney - November 12, 2008 3:30 PM
Flaming balls get me hot
19. I'm a Computer - November 12, 2008 3:32 PM
So let me get this right, this weapon is rubberized rocket fuel, molded into a cylinder, then set on fire? Genius. Now mold it into a garden gnome, light it on fire, then youtube that shit for us to see.
20. RIMTUCK - November 12, 2008 3:48 PM
We need vids of this in action!!
21. PEWPEWPEW - November 12, 2008 3:49 PM
I think I made these as a kid.. Tennis ball ,gasoline, bbq lighter and one burnt down tree house
22. LSDiesel - November 12, 2008 4:04 PM
The next best thing to a flaming bag of dog shit on your neighboor's porch!
23. Jim - November 12, 2008 5:13 PM
Buuuurrrrrn - Buuuuurrrrrrrn - BUUUUUURRRRRRN - BURN YOUR WICKED GARDEN TO THE GROUND....yeeaah!
24. Elmo - November 12, 2008 6:41 PM
Woah what the f***?? that's insane!
i'm going to have nightmares!
25. Lieutenant Bob - November 12, 2008 7:02 PM
WTB video. NOW.
26. Marijn - November 13, 2008 4:16 AM
Finding a Cave
Getting yourself a flaming ball,
Burning Taliban's ass, Priceless!
27. Jeff Sparkman - November 13, 2008 12:52 PM
Do not taunt Happy Fun Ball.
28. Sir_SiCo - November 24, 2008 5:09 AM
didn't they have these in Half Life?
29. louis vuitton - September 28, 2009 2:01 AM
firsty!!!!