Thanksgiving Made Easy: A 2-Hour Turkey
Well folks, if you haven't noticed by the lack of people at work or canned pumpkin at Kroger, tomorrow is Thanksgiving. The day we Americans celebrate Jesus's first bite of whole foods (some say it was a wise man's camel) and the subsequent decimation of the Native American population via laced cornucopia. So, to help you get in the spirit of it all, a Thanksgiving-ish post!
The Nuwave Oven Pro is a $120 portable oven that can allegedly cook a 10-pound turkey (or small sibling) in a mere two hours. "NuWave performs this miracle using three kinds of heat: Conduction, convection and infrared, turning that raw bird into a golden brown beauty in no time flat." Oh really? I bet we could cut the cooking time down to an hour by adding a fourth type of heat -- my body's. Did that just turn you on? You're lying if you say it didn't. Anyway, as a notorious one last minute man, I'm gonna have to use the NuWave, seeing how my turkey isn't even thawed yet. Or purchased for that matter. I'll let you know how it goes.
UPDATE: Mmmm, raw turkey with salmonella gravy, love it.
NuWave Oven Pro cooks a turkey in 2 hours [dvice]
-
I'm serious, lay off the Turbaconucken. But it's just so good! *chewing* Hit the jump to see a bunch more delectable treats from thisiswhyyourefat.com that will stop your heart before you can say NOM NO... / Continue →
-
That's right folks: according to the cannibals of Papua New Guinea, the Japanese are delicious. Anthropologist Olga Ammann describes it more succinctly in the book. She quotes people who have eaten other humans: "The meat of white people smells too strongly and is too salty.... / Continue →
-
Wonder what you're doing tonight? This is what you're doing tonight. Now you don't have to think, just trace your path with a bloated, cranberry stained finger. Don't worry, I'm looking out for you. With binoculars. In the bushes across the street. Also, I'm using a sonic... / Continue →
