Sep 30 2008Woman Celebrates Halloween Early


A Cincinnati woman went out and did it up right by celebrating Halloween early this year.

Police say 32 year old Michelle Allen was chasing children in the 3100 block of Wilbraham, while wearing the cow costume early Monday evening. Allen also reported urinated on a neighbor's front porch. An officer told Allen to go home and stay there for the remainder of the evening.

Police were later called to North Verity Avenue, where Allen was allegedly blocking traffic. The arresting officer says Allen smelled of alcohol, slurred her speech, and was belligerent. She also alleged cussed at the officer.

Sounds like a pretty typical Halloween if you ask me.

Woman Wearing Cow Suit Arrested [local12]

Thanks to Eric, who agrees the only way to really pee on a neighbor's porch is in a bear suit.

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Reader Comments

HAH fat cow xD

I can't believe they didn't make her take off the mask for her mug shot

lol 1st whores eat it


dammit i mean fourth first time top 20! lol peeing on porch.

lol, i like how they made har take the mugshots with the cow suit still on

God damn it. I keep telling Mum it's the 31st and every year she does this.

Call me... if u dare...


OMG i just called that number and instantly won $100!!! It's real!! Now forward this to 120 people in 4 seconds or else you will get billed $500 and your family will pee.

This cow came trick or treating at my house and gave me a bucket of cow pee pees in exhange for a snickers bar! Or was it the other way around? Anyways, it was disgusting and there was pooples everywhere!


Only in my city would that happen...

I guess she couldnt find any Joker disguise of her size

i wonder what made her do all this ..
but then again she did a stupid mistake by cussing at the officer at the end .. everyone knows that that what made her get caught .. i do this every year and when the police come .. i sleep with him/her. that's what she should have done!

Would it be exceedingly crass of me to remark on the appropriateness of that particular costume?

Even without the cow outfit I would have ran.

ive done worse.

..but seriously, this is what happens when you run out of bananas at the local grocer, due to a financial crisis. DOH!!

..but seriously, this is what happens when you run out of bananas at the local grocer, due to a financial crisis. DOH!!

f*** yeah, double post!

Well, comments were fine until #17. KKK member "poop", who is smart enought type on a keyboard and use the Interweb-thing, cleverly draws our attention to the fact that that woman is African-American (in case nobody noticed). See? Africa... bananas... get it? Hilarious! How do you come up with this stuff man? You should be a stand-up comedian!

I didn't even make the connection until you so graciously pointed it out, Jacko. I assumed it meant "bananas" as in crazy; but I suppose those who are always looking for racist/sexist/ect. ect. comments can make leaps inorder to prove their point.

On another note, I keep my house decorated for Halloween all-year 'round. I don't pee on porches though. Oh no, we're talking about porches, we could all be conciously/unconciously making a reference to porch monkeys! *gasp* Someone call Jesse Jackson. Hopefully he has a whistle tip in his car that goes Whoo Whoo.

AHHHH #17, that was not funny!!!!! I think PETA was behind this somehow......

maybe it's just me but i love when black ppl dress up in animal costumes.

My God that woman has an unfortunate looking face. She and Brian Peppers should get married.

As for the costume, she is out standing in her field.

This gets even better. I heard on the local news this morning that she was also asking people to pull on her udders.

True story.....really....not making this up.....*sighs*

How is this tech worthy?

LMFAO!!!!! This should've been next to the PETA breastmilk post...

This is a waste of human life

Stretching your mandate a bit, there, aren't you, GW?

Thats black people for you. Or a play on Obama's words, "Typical black person"

HAHAHAHA! She peed on the porch! What was she high on?

Doesn't this belong on the Superficial?

Hey J@cko i think he was refering to the fact that she looks like a gorilla.

@20, I happen to know poop is not in the KKK because I've never seen him at any of the meetings. OK, I'm not a member either but couldn't pass up the opportunity. Just like when I manipulate J@cko's name and come up with J@ckass.....See what I did there?

By the way, now Cincinnati is famous for 2 things: Chili and now the black piss in her pants cow.

Note: Halloween is not a holiday. Just thought I'd throw that in.

34th bitches. That's right, theeerrrtyy fouurrth.


@SmokingGirl, that may be one of the funniest comments I've read in a couple days.
"Ya'kno It's like an alarm clock in the morning with the WHOO WHOO!!! They should be up making pancakes or sumfin like that"

also to J@cko, how the hell do you know she's from Africa? Also she's not African-American damnit she's American or an imigrant from another country. Africa as far as I remember isn't a country so it's hard to be native to the country of Africa and also how the hell do you know she's from Africa? You do know that there are black people native to other parts of the world right???

also since J@cko your comment annoyed me, why the correlation between Africa and Bananas? Who the hell really thinks of Africa when you say bananas? I persoannly don't probably because Africa (the continent) as a whole doesn't really produce all that many bananas. I might think of Asia or South America but really Africa? They do produce bananas but not really that many so i still don't get why you called poop a KKK member for referencing bananas? Maybe he's talking about potassium deficiencies making people go crazy.

Bubb Rubb says, "WHOOO WHOOOOOOOOOO!!!" Now make me some pancakes bitches!

@35, I am disappointed as I thought you were really digging on my post. Can I pretend that you were in fact referencing the fact that my post was awesome?

Okay so let me get this straight. A middle age black woman dressed as a cow, is wandering around at night causing trouble and publicly urinating.

That's f***ing hilarious. And yes, racist jokes do apply here. There are stereotypes for a reason.


this makes me want to have a root beer float


@44 - Not anymore...

@45, you either! Take that second of the lasts.

Ok guys, my bad. I overreacted. Sincere apologies to Poop.
As far as I'm concerned I love the dry humour of this Website because it makes fun of people's choices, not of what they were born into.
I was impressed when commentators almost unanimously praised artists like Sarah McLachlan or Queen Latifah. That's what we need more of. I think we can all raise the bar avoiding racist jokes about skin color/ethnicity/body weight.
Word to your mother.

For anyone wondering why this is geeky, look at her costume. Nuff said.

@47, no need to apologize, you were just the target of least resistance on this subject. Nobody will even care on the next subject and you may even be able to gang up on somebody me for instance.

@47, it seems you keep forgetting to put the "ff" at the end of your username.

Sorry. I had to. I'm done now.

Sorry I'm a little late to this thread but... This is "utterly" ridiculous.

I think what I like most is that she's terrorizing people and peeing in public (which is significantly more involved for women that for us lucky ones), and the cops say "Hey, go home." It's like they couldn't be bothered to do the paperwork.

Actually, they may be on to something here: Anyone getting their mug shot taken must dress up in a animal costume befitting their alleged crime. What would yours be?

@ 50
Because that's what you do in the basement with a mental picture of my manliness.

Is mad cow disease to blame for all of this? They said it'd never affect us here in the US...

@54, Ever since I was a little boy, I vowed to myself I would only masturbate to a Sarah Palin porno, in the rare event that one might be made someday.

@ Miles - I'll give you 3 guesses as to which mine would be...

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