Sep 25 2008Best iPhone Application EVER

paiTouch, an iPhone application created by Japanese blogger Technohippy, is a virtual breast. You can poke and prod it all you want and it kind of jiggles around. It's actually pretty crappy. You can test it out here, just click and drag the cursor around. I've got to admit: if this is what touching a booby is like, I'm not that excited about it anymore. Now a penis....JK!
Virtual Breasts, Coming to Your iPhone [inventorspot]
Thanks to Phil, who touches enough of the real thing to not need a stupid app.
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Reader Comments
1. Thumperchica - September 25, 2008 3:02 PM
This app is lamer than PETA
2. Level 70 Undead Warloque - September 25, 2008 3:02 PM
First...
Hmm Not all that great.
3. ben! - September 25, 2008 3:03 PM
Holy god. First comment, ever.
Shit app.
Wtf?
4. Level 70 Undead Warloque - September 25, 2008 3:03 PM
@2 - Fail
There I beat you to it.
5. Miles - September 25, 2008 3:03 PM
Technohippy is clearly a terminal virgin.
6. Count Orlock - September 25, 2008 3:04 PM
Water balloon tit.
7. Rob - September 25, 2008 3:06 PM
Yes...it IS crappy. And yet...you STILL wrote about it! Thanks...now EVERY crappy coder is going to try and get you to publish their...well...crap!
8. Thumperchica - September 25, 2008 3:12 PM
@ 1 & 4 - your need to knock yourself down saddens me more than your original fail...
9. matt - September 25, 2008 3:13 PM
Obviously the developer of this App has never touched a real breast.
And judging by the lameness that he actually had to create this shitty app to begin with, he will never ever touch one. Ever.
Matt
10. neal - September 25, 2008 3:17 PM
@ 9 - He could have probably just grabbed his own and figured out that his app = FAIL.
11. ginormagantuan - September 25, 2008 3:30 PM
yeah, but you guys don't understand where this guy is from this shit will be the f***ing bomb! we're talking Japan here! them f***ers buy body pillows with schoolgirl pic on them and hump he shit out of them! we're talking about the same people that sell used panties in vending machines! I have seen then too!
12. Angel Mass - September 25, 2008 3:44 PM
Wow many of the Geekologie readers are going to finally know what a boob is like! in a way...
13. Jo Mama - September 25, 2008 3:47 PM
Feel like a bag of sand! Me so horny!?!?! ME SO STUPID!
14. Amy - September 25, 2008 3:48 PM
OMG! quadruple WTF!? I remember I made this program in my c++ class right after I pooped in my friend's mouth. So WTF huh? STFU
15. LSDiesel - September 25, 2008 3:53 PM
What are these "breasts" everyone keeps babbling on about?
16. ginormagantuan - September 25, 2008 3:59 PM
If boobs behaved like that in real life, I would be paranoid
17. ginormagantuan - September 25, 2008 4:04 PM
that actually seems to behave more like a fat f***er's belly
18. Mel - September 25, 2008 4:05 PM
I don't think boobs are supposed to act like aqueous blobs....or maybe mine just aren't doing their job correctly. I imagine if they did work like that, it'd be like grabbing a handful of Gak.
Am I the only one who remembers Gak?
19. Thumperchica - September 25, 2008 4:09 PM
I remember Gak!! I had sent in a sample of my breasts to the Nickelodeon laboratory and that's how they came up with the stuff! My boobs are gross!! =)
20. Capn Cookie - September 25, 2008 4:14 PM
That is a simulation of a water balloon in low gravity.
21. Ash - September 25, 2008 4:15 PM
who could forget gak!!!! Its right up there with Orbitz mmmm who doesnt want floaties in there drink. RIP Orbitz 1996-1996
22. TetraShiva - September 25, 2008 4:19 PM
@20
What he said.
This guy has never touched a breast before, as obvious from him making this application in the first place.
23. Tenchi059 - September 25, 2008 4:34 PM
@22: You stole my thoughts.
24. Mr.Mitchell - September 25, 2008 5:11 PM
Amy I didn't think you would be into that kind of stuff...
25. Mr.Mitchell - September 25, 2008 5:11 PM
ya know C++...
26. Amy - September 25, 2008 5:58 PM
Ew. Shut up. I am way too hot for any of you stupid ugly assnerds with tiny baby hands.
27. Daisy - September 25, 2008 7:04 PM
Fake!
It looks like low quality animation done as a storyboard for Never Back Down.
28. bR1an - September 25, 2008 7:10 PM
@25
Mr. Mitchell, you may or may not be suprised what my Amy is into.
Amy: Assnerds? (groans) I just got all cleaned up from the last time and now you uncork a bottle of "assnerds" ( eyes roll back in head and knees buckle).
29. lol - September 25, 2008 7:41 PM
bR1an you made me LOL again until i pee-peed my panties a whole bunch homie!
30. Amy - September 25, 2008 7:50 PM
Okay guys, all humor aside, how many of us actually went to the link to try out the boobie app? *raises hand*
31. Amy - September 25, 2008 7:51 PM
Oh, uh....the "other Amy" is back. :/ We really gotta stop all this confusion.
32. Amy - September 25, 2008 7:53 PM
For the record, I repeat, only the last three comments are actually mine. I dunno who this other douche is trying to steal my geek identity is, but they win the douchebaggery of the year award. I don't think I'm that hot and I certainly don't get off on insulting other people, especially when they're fellow nerdkin like me.
33. Arny - September 25, 2008 8:27 PM
Oh wait and this one too.
PS, you're all a bunch of wankers, and I revel in watching your worship of me. Tell me about your fantasies and such.
34. Linah - September 26, 2008 1:49 AM
this boob sucks !! i'd rather play with my own boons instead!
35. Linah - September 26, 2008 1:49 AM
this boob sucks !! i'd rather play with my own boobs instead!
36. Linah - September 26, 2008 1:59 AM
stupid geekologie posts everything so quickly !
37. Ginormagantuan - September 26, 2008 3:30 AM
#36....... I think they intended this app for guys with no means of ever getting to touch a real (girl) boob, so if you are a girl and have boobs of your own then of course this boob sucks, it acts more like a water balloon, I too would rather play with your boobs instead.
38. GEOFF LEPPARD - September 26, 2008 8:59 AM
Aha, finally. A tit simulator. Just what the world's been waiting for.
I'd love it if both 'Amies' were the same - terminally bored - person.
39. Arny - September 26, 2008 10:00 AM
@38 - I think there are more than 2.
40. Amy - September 26, 2008 12:13 PM
This is why Geekologie needs to have login access-only content for posters. I'm sick of this.
I'm removing any links, personal pages, etc. I've used in the past. I don't know why you guys continue to do this, or why, but all it does is show your extreme lack of tact and maturity.
Or just plain jealousy.
41. Rithly - September 26, 2008 12:20 PM
@39 - Chicks with multiple personalities are the best.
42. Linah - September 26, 2008 2:46 PM
@37 you're always welcome to check out the real thing
changing the world one geek at a time ;)
43. ginormagantuan - September 26, 2008 5:32 PM
wow by real thing do you mean like, your hooters? that wouls be uber sweet then again how would i accomplish that, yeah you should make an app of your boob, you know custom made
44. GEOFF LEPPARD - September 26, 2008 8:05 PM
I think we had this Imposter Issue back when this was Hedonistica. They got some login system sorted out, but seem to have forgotten it along the way.
Multiple Elvis Juleps. Sweet stuff.
45. Pastor Al - September 26, 2008 10:14 PM
BELIEVE IT!
46. Dylan - September 27, 2008 12:24 AM
@ 45 - F*** Naruto!
47. GEOFF LEPPARD - September 27, 2008 9:49 AM
Exactly, Al.
Have you been here this whole time? I can't decide who I think is writing here now. You're one of the candidates, mind.
48. Believer - September 28, 2008 3:30 AM
@ 45
WEAAAAAAABOOO!!
49. Huh... - September 28, 2008 12:24 PM
whoever invented this obviously did not base this off a real boob. Anyone with boobs like that need to reconsult their plastic surgeon.
50. Mr.Boob - September 28, 2008 12:41 PM
http://asiajin.com/blog/2008/09/23/paitouch-physical-boob-simulator-comes-to-iphone/
more info on how it works and
http://blog.technohippy.net/Oppai.swf
for the full "game" the same as the pic.
51. Hynoticfrog - November 13, 2008 2:34 AM
I wish my girlfriends boobs still had that kind of a physics engine.