Aug 5 2008I Want: This Periodic Coffee Table
This $8,550 Periodic Coffee Table features actual samples of all 92 naturally occurring elements.
By embedding all element samples in clear acrylic, they are beautifully presented and also protected from tarnishing. This format also helps to addresses health and safety issues, as all potentially toxic or corrosive substances are permanently encased in a thick layer of robust resin. Argon gas and mineral oil is further used to ampoule reactive samples and preserve their freshly cut appearance.
Sweet, but back when I went to school there were only a few elements: earth, wind, water, fire, and aether (which I always felt was a bullshit element to begin with). Anyways, I failed a test once because I wrote rain, sleet, snow, hail and tornadoes. I demanded partial credit, but my professor refused. So you know what I did? I got elemental on his ass. Specifically, I set his car on fire.
Hit the jump for some closeups and a link to the product page.
Product Site
Thanks Aaron, now lets order a whole bunch and then chisel the elements out and make a bomb. We can detonate it in the woods behind my parent's house.
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Reader Comments
1. Alex - August 5, 2008 11:54 AM
Woaaaaa, sweeet Radioactive thingy! Let's make bombs!
2. Huh? - August 5, 2008 11:54 AM
Neat.
3. Madgame - August 5, 2008 11:55 AM
This table was made with the element 'awesominium'
4. Dan - August 5, 2008 11:56 AM
that's friggin sexy! oh i had a drem i was giving it to smokinggirl on one of these.
hmmm...... that would be hot!
5. el - August 5, 2008 11:57 AM
This is all different kinds of awesome!
6. TW?TCH - August 5, 2008 12:04 PM
@madgame: YOU'RE awesominium!
7. Julian - August 5, 2008 12:14 PM
I think at least half the things in this table can kill you . . . which makes this table the most fucking awesome thing ever to hold my sippy cup of chocolate milk.
8. Count Orlock - August 5, 2008 12:21 PM
Some douchebags gonno buy one and crack it open.
9. Sell Porn Make Money - August 5, 2008 12:27 PM
@7 - That is pretty funny stuff.
10. Tim - August 5, 2008 12:47 PM
they missed one out,
the element of surprise!
shorthand: OH
its position on the table is where you least suspect it........
put that in resin!!!!
11. yeah - August 5, 2008 12:51 PM
i wonder how much it would be worth with the radioactive stuff
12. OMgirl - August 5, 2008 12:52 PM
does it really have radioactive elements?
does a cup of really really hot coffee can be a threat to my coffee table??
anyways it looks so damn geek, i just want to have one!
13. whistle - August 5, 2008 1:30 PM
My dad once invented "The Periodic Table", a table that was moody as hell and started bleeding approximately every 28 days. It didn't catch on and bankrupted him. Then the table left his broke ass and is now living in a beach house in Florida... a bitch, ain't it?
14. ashley - August 5, 2008 1:43 PM
i fucking hate math
15. Lynz - August 5, 2008 1:44 PM
Sold!
16. guate6 - August 5, 2008 1:56 PM
I must say, this is awesome! I'll take at least forty, and sell the elements for the cost of the table.
17. Another John - August 5, 2008 2:14 PM
@Tim: Actually your element of surprise is composed of awesominium.
18. SmokingGirl - August 5, 2008 2:16 PM
Suicide and murder just got easier.
19. Charles - August 5, 2008 2:29 PM
I just need a table composed of Cn - Chuck Norris. If you spill anything on it it roundhouse kicks you in the face.
20. OctoGooch - August 5, 2008 4:18 PM
so i just trust that the named gases are provided as well? hell no. im testing it by drilling holes and sniffing.
21. barneyg - August 5, 2008 6:28 PM
It's flittering consumer dufuses like yourself that are sending this planet into the toilet with your consumerism.
Blog on, chump!
22. mikep - August 6, 2008 10:27 AM
#21:
Wait..did you type "filtering" or flittering"? damn dyslexia..I was looking for a gold-plated reverse-osmosis coffee filter for my new porn wing on the house, and you got me all excited about getting a Dufusnium sample to add to the periodic table in the guest mansion. Maybe I'll just add you to my collection of trite virgin trolls of the solar system I keep it in the surrounding villas which I purchased.
23. tan - August 6, 2008 3:23 PM
"Actually your element of surprise is composed of awesominium."
If it was composed of another material then it wouldn't be a material.
24. gypsy - August 7, 2008 10:12 AM
Tim and whistle. . .SO funny! I think I peed a little. . .
25. another john - August 7, 2008 7:15 PM
Exactly Tan, it's a molecule. And who could tell me the formula of Tim's element of surprise? Maybe the lady in the back? By the way, could you stop chewing and pay a little attention to what I'm saying? No, I'm not asking, it was rethorical!