Aug 29 2008 Labor Day Weekend: Now With More C-String
WARNING: the gallery after the jump is probably NSFW.
What is that, a hair band? Nope, it's underwear -- a C-string. The misnamed C-string doesn't actually have any straps, it's kept on by hugging the vagina and buttcrack. Now that's sexy talk.
C-String has a flexible internal frame that hugs and holds it to the body both securely and comfortably. Your modesty remains safely covered at all times. At the front it looks like sexy underwear, to the rear it has a thong-style strip, and to the sides it has nothing at all!
Wow, this is best thing to happen to underwear since not wearing any. Each vagina-band costs about $26 and is guaranteed to turn heads. And, also, my shoe camera.
Hit the jump for a NSFW Labor Day Weekend C-String Picture Extravaganza!
UPDATE: Added a German video about the C-string with funny subtitles.
Continue Reading " Labor Day Weekend: Now With More C-String "
Aug 29 2008 Recreating The Mona Lisa In Less Than A Second....With A 1,100 Barrel Paintball Gun
In a demonstration at Nvidia's NVISION show, the Mythbusters used paintball guns to illustrate the difference between current CPUs and future GPUs. The CPU's stand in was a single paintball gun that repositioned itself after every shot in order create a picture. But the GPU was represented by an 1,100 barrel gun, which paints the entire Mona Lisa in a single blast. You can watch the first one if you want, but I'd just skip to about 1:30, when they unveil the real nasty mother. And don't miss the last 10 seconds of the clip, because they replay the shot in slow motion, and it's freaking crazy. Which, incidentally, so am I. Just don't tell her I called her that, she'd get pissed.
Mythbusters Build a 1100-Barrel Paintball Gun to Paint the Mona Lisa, Instantly [gizmodo]
Thanks to Kezzzs and Dan, who once painted the town red with alcohol in less than 5 hours, but both lost shoes.
Aug 29 2008 Exemplary Parenting: A Grand Theft Auto Cake For Your 4-Year Old. Oh Man, Please Tell Me A Stripper Jumped Out Of It!
What better way is there to celebrate Lil Derrick's 4th birthday than with a violence packed video game and a couple strippers? Exactly, none. But seeing how GTA: San Andreas came out a while ago, I imagine Lil Derrick is probably a little older now. So, from all of us here at Geekologie (just me): Happy 7th Birthday Derrkick, I sent you a cake in juvie. Oh, and there's a surprise inside. Hint: It's a knife. It's your birthday, get stabby!
I Believe the Children are Our Future [cakewrecks]
Thanks to Nils, who baked a handgun cake for his son's 4th birthday because, damnit, the man knows good parenting.
Aug 29 2008 Guy Makes Full Size Driveable Landspeeder
Daniel Deutsch went and built himself a 1:1 scale replica of the Star Wars Landspeeder that looks so good, I swear it's been shopped. But allegedly I'm wrong, and the vehicle has "a custom aluminum chassis, fiberglass body, and an electric drive system that hits lightspeed at 25 mph." Freaking sweet! Now you know what they say, "The Vette gets 'em wet, but the Landspeeder, well, the Landspeeder dries 'em out while they make fun of you." Awesome!
Hit the jump for several more pictures of the unbelievably accurate and good looking speeder, including a couple of the build.
Continue Reading " Guy Makes Full Size Driveable Landspeeder "
Aug 29 2008 Cyber Clean Cleans Electronics, Tastes Great
Cyber Clean looks like, wait, is a slimeball and cleans your electronics. You just take the $8 Play-Doh, mash it into your keyboard, digital camera, phone, taint, etc. and then remove. Presto, clean and germ free! I just got a sample, I'll let you know how it goes.
UPDATE: j 09ctju j0954iy[ 0]kt [p9i34poi 34po]i0-] ln p;7816e6 erw761ew 786er w34[io pjkofp[i[12r c x213t43v2gv45 n67un,87m.8 0/-[=]/9+281708+ oi;jmio;im,,m
Keyboard's clean!
Cyber Clean cleansing goop: 'I press it on, and the mess is gone!' [dvice]
Aug 29 2008 Steve Jobs's Obituary Accidentally Published
For those of you who haven't heard, Steve Jobs's 17-page prewritten obituary was accidentally published when somebody at Bloomberg chose the wrong button after some routine updating to the information. Woops. You can read the whole thing after the jump, it's nice and wordy and names Jobs as Apple Co-Founder and Arbiter of Cool Technology. Bitchin' title! You know, this story really got me thinking -- what will people say about me when I'm dead? You think I'll get 17 pages?
FUTURE UPDATE:
Geekologie Writer, Writer of Technology, Penises, 39
The Geekologie Riter was a monster freaking asshole. Thankfully, now he's a ded one.
Wow, fourteen words and two misspellings. I'm killing myself.
Hit it to read all the amazing things Jobs has done.
Continue Reading " Steve Jobs's Obituary Accidentally Published "
Aug 29 2008 Man Sells Last Respect For George Lucas
A man is selling his last respect for George Lucas on eBay, in the form of a Darth Maul figure.
Because this Darth Maul represented my faith in George Lucas (it was bought back in the heady days of 1999 when the words Star and Wars still brought to mind childhood dreams and wonderment), you are also bidding on the last morsels of respect I have for the once all-powerful, formally infallible bearded wonder. If you must know, the use of the woeful Wookie 'Tarzan' cry in Revenge of the Sith is the straw that broke the Bantha's back. It was almost unforgivable in Return of the Jedi, but to have it featured again in Episode 3 was just ridiculously [expletive] STUPID!
I've made so many excuses for George in the past - even to the point of suggesting that Jar Jar would be bearable if he spoke in an alien language with subtitles - but after witnessing the CGI monkeys and gophers in Indiana Jones and the UFOs, I've got nothing left for him (except for what this Darth Maul represents)... And to think of the rabid, blind hope I had towards the end of the 90s before I entered the cinema to see Episode 1...
Bidding starts at $10 Australian, but since the seller is a loyal Geekologie reader, he'll accept an old NES cartridge or a naked picture of....well, anything.
Thanks Porl, I want half of whatever you get. I call left boob if it's a nudey pic.
Aug 29 2008 Is This A Swedish Sea Monster?
I dunno, it kind of looks like a rectangle humping a tapeworm.
A group of filmmakers claim to have successfully captured Sweden's legendary Great Lake Sea Monster (Storsjöodjuret), which is said to lurk in the waters of the Storsjön outside Östersund in northern Sweden.
"It clearly shows that it's warm and is made up of cells, otherwise our cameras wouldn't indicate red, so it can be a sea snake or some other kind of sea animal," said a female member of the film crew to Sveriges Television news in Jämtland.The effort to find the monster has generated a great deal of interest, with the American television network NBC planning to document the hunt.
Boy are they in for a surprise. You see, the Great Lake Sea Monster is actually SPOILER ALERT: my penis. I guess he wasn't joking when he said he was packing the balls and moving to Sweden. Wait, then what's....
UPDATE: An ear of baby corn.
Hit the jump for a video news report in Swedish.
Aug 28 2008 A Chrome Lamborghini: Sure To Turn Heads, Blind Other Motorists And Cause Accidents
First the gold Porsche, then the Burberry Maserati and chrome Ferrari, and now, another chrome-dome, but this time a Lamborghini Murcielgo LP640. And it's for sale here if you want it, but it'll set you back around 622,000 coconuts. Which, if you were the professor, would make one helluva lot of radios. And speaking of coconuts, fun fact: coconut milk, despite its name, doesn't come from a woman's teat. Long story short: my girlfriend tricked me into getting her pregnant.
Hit the jump for several more of the shiny speed demon.
Aug 28 2008 Internet Explorer 8 To Feature 'Porn Mode'
Microsoft's Internet Explorer 8 (now out for beta testing) will feature a 'porn mode', aka InPrivate, similar to Safari's 'Private Browsing' feature.
The new InPrivate feature on Internet Explorer 8 -- now in Beta release, and dubbed by many in the Web development community as "porn mode," a nod to its most obvious use -- when enabled automatically conceals sites visited by wiping clean browsing and search history, cookies, form data and passwords. It also clears the browser cache at the end of each session.
Once the setting is chosen, others using the same computer will not be able to see which sites have been accessed, the company said. Other browsers have similar functions, but this one is far more prominent. Although casual users cannot see the previous user's search history, authorities such as the police will be able to access it if necessary.
Man, I don't know. My girlfriend is pretty damn computer savvy. If the cops can get at, she already has. Which means she's probably on to my secret ROTFLBDSM fetish and is itching to stomp my balls to mush in red stilettos.
Microsoft Internet Explorer 8 to Include So-Called 'Porn Mode' Privacy Feature [foxnews]
Thanks to Bryan, who's smart enough to know that watching porn together is an important part of any healthy relationship (excluding relatives and pets).
Aug 28 2008 Zero Carbon Footprint: The Solar Ice Maker
It may look like a funhouse mirror and potato gun, but this sucker is actually a solar powered ice maker that requires no electricity, and can produce 14 lbs of ice per day.
It works like this: the solar icemaker uses a refrigerant liquid that evaporates when exposed to the sun. The vapor travels through pipes that come into contact an absorbent material, which cools when the sun goes down. Once the slow-cooling absorbent hits 104°F, the refrigerant turns back into a liquid and its temperature drops like a rock to below freezing because of pressure differences. Put some water next to the evaporator's exterior and, presto, ice.
Awesome. I love ice. But you know what I love even more? Refrigerant. Shit's better than Kool-Aid. Plus you don't have to worry about that big red bastard "Oh Yeah!"ing his fat ass through the side of your house.
Solar icemaker: get the sun to keep things cool for a change [dvice]
Aug 28 2008 Another Day, Another Winged Cat
Another day, another cat sprouts wings.
A tabby from the Qingyan province in China recently sprouted a pair of fur-covered wings on his back during a hot-weather spell, the U.K.'s Daily Mail reported.
One cat owner, identified only as Feng, claimed her pet's wings were the result of stress from too many females desiring to mate with him, the Mail reported.
F***, now I'll never grow wings.
Hit the jump for a picture of Feng's winged cat (a different one) from a while ago, and a link to its story.
Aug 28 2008 These Hilarious Star Wars T-Shirts Are Sure To Get Fangirls To Touch Your Saber
Just kidding. I do like them though. This one here, the Jedi EcoSaber is available in 22 different colors and costs $26 or $29 depending on if you want long sleeves or not. Hit the jump for another one with a crashed TIE Fighter Advanced x1 and Darth Vader escaping on an inflatable slide, possibly into a Dagobah swamp. Although I don't see Luke running around with that creepy green puppet on his back, so who knows.
Hit it to see the other.
Continue Reading " These Hilarious Star Wars T-Shirts Are Sure To Get Fangirls To Touch Your Saber "
Aug 28 2008 USB Hub + Torn Up Graduation Gown = USB Hub Monster, Kids Afraid Of The Computer
Want to make your own USB Hub Monster? It doesn't look very hard. You just take a regular hub, add a bunch of USB cables with armature wire taped to them, and then tear up the college graduation gown you keep in the closet but break out every year during graduation and wear to the bars to score free drinks, tear that sucker up, wrap the hub and legs, and presto: a, um, USB Hub Monster! Add red LED eyes for a real monster-y effect. Or, add some beef flavor to make it something your dog will tear up, like it wasn't going to anyways.
Hit the jump for one more picture of the monster in use.
Aug 28 2008 Politically Incorrect: Slamming DNC Protester
I swear, some of you really love yourselves some brutality. This is a potentially NSFW video of a CodePink protester getting slammed to the ground by police at the Democratic National Convention. It's kind of graphic, and contains profanity. A police officer is telling protesters to "back it up", then you hear the woman say something like "f*cking do it again" and then the copper comes back with a "back it up, bitch!" and a slam to the ground. I don't really know what to say, except the last time an officer of the law pushed me he got a baton enema. Oh, and violence is not the answer. The answer, my friends, is C. Go on, fill in the little bubble. Ha, no, C is the third bubble, not the second one.
Youtube
Thanks David and Tom, may no man wielding a stick ever push you to the ground.
Aug 28 2008 WWJD?: Probably Not Play Guitar Praise
Guitar Praise: Solid Rock is a Guitar Hero rip-off available next month for $100. It will only be available for PC and Mac though, so you'll have to talk your PS3 or 360 into converting. How do you play?
Two guitars can be connected at the same time, so two guitarists can play together - either on the same track or one on lead, the other on bass. Players press the fret buttons and strum on the strum bar in time to the color-coded notes as they scroll onscreen.
Sounds original. The game comes loaded with Christian favorites like Jesus Is My Drinking Buddy and I Wanna Roundhouse The Devil In The Gooch. And who can forget that Christmas favorite Santa, You Fat Bastard, You Ate All The Cookies Now Where The F*** Are My Video Games? It's available for pre-order now, but that's not what Jesus would do. Jesus would wait to read some reviews and then steal it from Wal-Mart. Trust me, I went to Sunday school.
Guitar Praise - Knocking Off Guitar Hero.. For Jesus [kotaku]
Thanks to Julian and Sam, who have both met Jesus at rock concerts.
Aug 27 2008 Grown Man Builds LEGO Boba Fett Costume
Simon, a grown-ass man, went and built himself a full Boba Fett costume out of LEGO pieces. As you can see, it's pretty damn impressive. Right up there with that little kid's cardboard Halo arsenal. Hit the jump for a bunch more of Simon and his costume, along with a Vader version he made as well. Uh-oh -- I just had the most brilliant idea ever.
Introducing the First Annual Geekologie LEGO Leia's Golden Bikini Contest! Full rules follow.
1. Contestants must construct and model a LEGO Golden Bikini
2. Digital photo required in entry
3. Must be holding a sign that reads "Geekologie" or "I Love You Geekologie Writer, I Want To Have Your Babies But Know You Don't Want Kids Right Now And I'm Totally Cool With That" or something similar so I know it's for the contest
4. No dudes
5. Hey you -- the guy that thought it would be funny to still enter anyways: stop.
6. LEGO pieces optional
7. Bikini optional
8. Naked photos only
Contest ends when I feel like it. Winners will be notified by personal stripper-gram. Your choice: fireman or police officer, I play both equally well.
Hit it for the photos.
Continue Reading " Grown Man Builds LEGO Boba Fett Costume "
Aug 27 2008 Robotic Legs Allow Paraplegics To Walk
Amit Goffer, who was paralyed in a 1997 accident, has invented ReWalk, which gives paraplegics the chance to walk again. Unfortunately, Goffer can't use the system himself, as it requires the use of your arms, which he doesn't have full use of.
The system, which requires crutches to help with balance, consists of motorized leg supports, body sensors and a back pack containing a computerized control box and rechargeable batteries.
The user picks a setting with a remote control wrist band -- stand, sit, walk, descend or climb -- and then leans forward, activating the body sensors and setting the robotic legs in motion."It raises people out of their wheelchair and lets them stand up straight," Goffer said. "It's not just about health, it's also about dignity."
Damn, that's probably the awesomest thing I've heard all day. Good looking, Goffer. I just hope these things don't fall into the hands of the non-paralyzed, lest they build a superhuman army.
Again, awesome. Hit the jump for three more pictures, the second of which is Goffer himself.
Aug 27 2008 Tokyoflash's Latest Wristwear: The Rogue
The Rogue is a watch that, when worn, lets others know you're chock full of bad-assery. And, quite possibly, bionic innards. The $155 watch comes in both black and silver, and is sure to turn heads and drop panties. So, how do you read it?
Once mastered, navigating the time is simple, but creates a sense of mystique to the uninformed. The outer ring of small dots represents minutes, every fifth dot being slightly smaller to distinguish five minute groups. The ring of large blocks represents rough minutes, the position of the gap indicating approximate minutes. The inner ring of blocks represents hours, the position of the gap in the ring showing the current hour as on a clock face.
Perfect sense. But I'm just going to tell everybody it's a miniature radar anyways. A dork-dar if a guy asks, but a poon-dar if it's a sexy lady. Because women really like it when you refer to their nether regions as "poon". As in "I'm trying to get some poon on my pudding spoon". Oh man, they love that one. Trust me, I'm a podiatrist.
Hit the jump for a picture of the watch in silver, and a graphic that helps explain how to read the time.
Continue Reading " Tokyoflash's Latest Wristwear: The Rogue "
Aug 27 2008 The Crayola EZ Type: This Isn't Your Kid's Keyboard. Ha, Just Kidding, It Totally Is
The $30 Crayola EZ Type USB Keyboard is a great way to get youngsters familiar with colors, and also, important computer skills that will benefit them throughout their adult lives. Namely, surfing interweb porno. And, to make it even easier for the tykes, Crayola appears to have added a "Porn" key, right above the directional pad. I mean, it's got to be real, it's right there in the picture. What? Photoshop? Like a place that develops film? Never heard of it.
Joel's next keyboard: Crayola EZ Type [bbgadgets]
Aug 27 2008 Hacked! USB Drive Will Befuddle Onlookers!
The Hacked! USB Drive is actually a 2GB flash drive that just looks like a frayed USB cable. ZOMG, people will look at that and be so confused! The only thing that could make it better is if, instead of a frayed USB cable, it was a real severed arm complete with tattoos and 4GB of storage. Imagine the looks you'd get with that hanging out the side of your laptop! Looks like "OMG, I'm calling the police!" and "bitchin' ink." Or, from the zombies, "I want a byte."
Hacked! USB Drive Guarantees Worried Stares From Passerbys [ohgizmo]
Thanks Beezy, you haven't seen my hacksaw lying around, have you?
Aug 27 2008 This Is What Happens...
When the CERN Large Hadron Collider starts crashing particles into shit next month. I can hardly wait!
Hit the jump for a highly questionable (yet informative) video of some chick singing a rap song about the collider.
Aug 27 2008 BEEP BOOP BEEP: Ultra-Rare R2-D2 Fridge
This R2-D2 fridge, one of only 1,000 given away at Japanese 7-11's back in 2002 as a promotional prize for when Attack of the Bones came out, is now for sale by ToyEast. The trashcanny droid can both cool and heat your meat, but asking price is a staggering $1,070. So yeah, a little out of my price range. But I did just call up a Jawa buddy of mine and told him I'd pay upwards of $40 for one in good condition. Then I threatened to gouge those glowing eyes right out of his freaking head if he doesn't make it happen. Shifty little bastard stole my toaster once.
Hit the jump for one more picture of the handsome devil.
Continue Reading " BEEP BOOP BEEP: Ultra-Rare R2-D2 Fridge "
Aug 27 2008 Game De-makes: BioShock For Gameboy
The Pixelation forum ran a contest for users to create screenshots of what modern games would look like on the Gameboy. As you can see, that's BioShock, and there's a pretty good Twilight Princess and Guitar Hero after the jump. The board's current contest is to make your own Mega Man level, within the color and graphic limitations of the original NES games. Pretty neat stuff, and there's definitely a good amount of talent out there. Check it out and give it a go if it's your cup of tea. If it's my cup of tea, slip in a roofie when I go to the bathroom. I'm trying to get crunked.
Hit it for the other two mock-ups.
Aug 26 2008 How To Slow Down Speeders In China
This is how local authorities decided to combat speeders on the Jing Zhuang highway in ShanXi province, China: with two 100 foot long, 2 foot high barriers that require motorists to slow down and wind their way through the passage. Hey, you know what else discourages speeders? Cutting their brake lines. Because then they can only go as fast as they feel comfortable hitting a tree. My wife sure as hell doesn't speed anymore. Or even drive for that matter. You see, she's dead. *sobbing*And the sad part is *sniffle* I hate cooking for myself.
Jump for one more picture of the foolproof anti-speeding deterrent.
Aug 26 2008 Racing Across Azeroth In Real Life
Two guys made rigs that turns running on treadmills into their characters actually running through Azeroth. They made them by attaching a bike wheel with an optical mousepad and mouse to the treadmills. It's estimated that characters in the game run around 12MPH, but since the two didn't want to have simultaneous heart attacks, they rigged the system to only have to run 6MPH themselves for their characters to reach that 12MPH top speed. How did it work out? You'll have to watch the video after the jump to find out. But suffice it to say that even running at a paltry 6MPH, they were both dangerously close to myocardial infarctions. I hope all of you WoW players out there learn a valuable lesson from this. One about the benefits of performance enhancing drugs.
Hit the jump for a couple more shots and a video of the race.
Aug 26 2008 Guy Builds Sons, Self A Wicked Treehouse
Steve Norris, vying for a Father Of The Year award, built an awesome treehouse for his two sons in a 58-year old silver maple.
It's equipped with electricity and cable TV. There's an intercom so Norris can talk to his kids if they're having a sleepover, and a urinal that drains into a pail beneath the structure.A smoke detector is wired to the house, so family members can be alerted to any smoke, whether they're in the treehouse or not. A revolving light clicks on when the treehouse's trap door opens (where a rope ladder drops down).
The roof is sealed and welded on tight, and the floor is sturdy enough to hold an adult. Stephen sleeps in a loft bed, Ryan on a mini-futon and their father on a pull-down bed.
Haha, you got a smoke detector in your treehouse. Seriously though kids, I'm sure you could still smoke pot in there. Norris figures he put about $5,000 into the fort, and has it insured for $20,000 in case the market goes sour and he needs to burn it down and collect.
Norris wants to see his sons grow up with the treehouse, which he thinks will last about 15 years. "We're planted here now," he said.
ZOMG, planted, too funny! Make like a tree and get out of here!
Treehouse is envy of neighborhood [therecord]
Thanks to Brad, who was building a treemansion when it got hit by a tornado and carried to Oz, where he had the opportunity to bang a bunch of Munchkins, but declined.
Aug 26 2008 Move Over, Goblin Shark: Robots Are Scarier
I told you. I told you robots would kill us all. This is a clip from a new BBC show, The Wrong Door, which is about robots and how much they want to hurt us. And speaking of the wrong door, I accidentally opened my roommate's after grabbing a snack in the middle of the night. Hello anime comic, hello penis in hand! Hello awkward silence, lifelong scarring, new roommate wanted ad.
The Wrong Door: If Terry Gilliam Directed Transformers as a TV Variety Show [gizmodo]
Aug 26 2008 Awesome: Woman Makes Cheap Solar Cells With Pizza Oven, Nail Polish, Inkjet Printer
Nicole Keupper, the hottie scientist seen above, somehow managed to make cheap solar cells with a pizza oven, nail polish, and inkjet printers. The feat won her two Australian Eureka Prizes, Australia's top science award, and, possibly, something to do with vacuums. Anyway, there's hope that the new cheap solar cells will make renewable energy a reality for developing and developed countries alike. And while I couldn't find out exactly how the cells are made, I have a pretty good idea. First, Nicole does her nails -- something to attract attention, but not too whorish, a subtle pink. Next, she gobbles a large cheese pizza, possibly with mushrooms and black olives. Lastly, she prints a solar cell. Now am I a scientist or what? Huh? Yes, it's a butcher's coat. No, I couldn't get a real lab coat because they started locking the chemistry building after dark. Something about "some asshole stealing lab coats". Hey, I can't help it if I look good in white.
Australian student fashions solar cells out of nail polish as only MacGyver could [dvice]
Aug 26 2008 Body Mice: Highly Questionable Peripherals
Looking for a way to put the spark back into computer porning? Enter the Body Optical Mouse, a $45 peripheral that's shaped like a woman's torso and has clickable tit buttons. You can get one with the World Cup shirt of your favorite team, or painted lingerie. Couple one with an upskirt mousepad and perv it up to the max! Each model even has its own name depending on the country, like Luisa for France and Francesca for Italy. Or, if your mouse is like the chick I brought home last night, Luke. His buttons were fake! His cord, sadly, wasn't.
Hit the jump for a couple more models.
Continue Reading " Body Mice: Highly Questionable Peripherals "
Aug 26 2008 Move Over, Robot: Goblin Shark Is Scarier
Goblin sharks look scary as hell and are scary as hell. Sure they're only a couple feet long, but they're uglier than my sister and have tons of sharp little teeth. Watch the video around 0:20 to see how it's mouth comes out of its face Aliens style to munch on dude's arm. Also, a friend told me that's what a woman's vagina looks like.
Japanese Goblin Shark [collegehumor]
Thanks to Libby, who once punched a goblin shark in the mouth because it looked at her funny.
Aug 26 2008 A Million Person Pyramid To Be Built?
Well, we've seen London's 100,000 person tower concept, and Japan's 1,000,000 person pyramid of doom, and now, unsurprisingly, Dubai wants in on the action. Dubai-based architecture firm Timelinks has developed plans for a million person ziggurat. What the hell's a ziggurat? "A ziggurat was a temple tower of the ancient Mesopotamian valley and Iran, having the form of a terraced pyramid of successively receding stories or levels. Some modern buildings with a step pyramid shape have also been termed ziggurats."
It may sound like just another concept that'll never be a reality, but Timelinks already set about patenting the design as well as the technology that would make it possible. The structure, nearly a whole square mile by design, would use a combination of steam, wind, and other alternative energy-gathering methods to keep itself entirely off the grid. There would also be "green spaces" that would provide the pyramidal city with agricultural space, to provide food and green-based commerce.
Hey, I'm all for a million person pyramid. But how about some $25,000 pyramid?
"You're a failure. I want to sleep with my cycling instructor. Your penis is four sizes too small."
Things my girlfriend tells me, FTW!
The Dubai Ziggurat: 1 million living souls in a pyramid, entirely self-contained [dvice]
Aug 25 2008 Wooden Supercar Apparently Being Built
Remember the article we ran on the Splinter, a 240MPH wooden supercar designed by a NC State graduate student? Yeah, well it turns out Joe Harmond, the student behind the concept, is actually building the damn thing. That's what it's supposed to look like when it's finished there. It still has a long way to go, but there's some build photos and a video after the jump. I must admit, I thought it was all a sham until I saw them. Dude is actually building himself a damn supercar. Out of wood. Good looking, Joe. Just imagine: if you can build a freaking car out of wood, imagine the treehouse you're gonna build me. It's gonna be sick! So yeah, start drawing up the plans. No, seriously, the car can wait, I need a freaking treehouse and I need it now.
Hit the jump for a couple random photos of the build in progress, Joe's official website, his blog, and a massive Flickr gallery.
Aug 25 2008 Intel Demonstrates Wireless Power Transfer
Last week Intel demonstrated a system that can broadcast 60 watts of power up to three feet with 75% efficiency. Using the system seen above, they shot power from one ring of death to the other, and lit a lightbulb. Now I'm not saying it's a good idea to wave your baby-maker around in between the two coils, but it most certainly is. Especially if you've ever wanted your balls to spontaneously combust. And honestly, who hasn't?
Intel demos a wireless power broadcasting system, villagers terrified [engadget]
Thanks Jill, and don't worry -- I'm sterile.
Aug 25 2008 Smart Goggles Help Find Stuff You've Lost
Smart Goggles not only make you look cool, they help find stuff you've misplaced.
To use the glasses, the wearer first wanders around a house or workplace for an hour or so, looking at the objects he or she may later want to find in a hurry. Each time the camera focuses on a object - such as a set of keys, a mobile phone or a purse - the wearer says the name aloud. The name is then recorded and stored into the memory.Once the names have been programmed in, the glasses will try to find the right name for any object they come across. The names appear in small type on the viewfinder. If they are unable to recognise an object they make a guess and - if they get it wrong - learn from their mistakes.
At some point in the future, if the wearer is trying to find their keys in a hurry, they simply name the object. The glasses search its video memory and show its last known location on the display.
Pretty neat concept, but I don't need any help finding my phone or keys. You see, I keep the phone in my car's cupholder, and just leave the keys in the ignit....freaking crackheads!
The Smart Goggles that could make lost keys, mobile phones or iPod a think of the past [dailymail]
Thanks Lauren, and no, I haven't seen your virginity -- but I'll keep my eyes peeled.
Aug 25 2008 Wait, Come Back: The Olympics Are Over
Well folks, the Olympics are over. And you know what that means: no more getting drunk at the bar and watching rhythmic gymnastics. Oh, and 100,000 used condoms. Wait, what?
The UNAIDS, the Beijing organizing committee BOCOG and International Olympics Committee are providing 100,000 condoms as part of a campaign on HIV prevention and anti-discrimination.
While sex is not an Olympic sport it is expected to be an activity in the Beijing village housing 10,500 athletes, all of whom are in great shape and with plenty of free time on their hands once knocked out of the Games.
First of all, sex should be an Olympic sport. And secondly, holy crap -- 100,000 condoms for 10,500 athletes? That's like each athlete having sex ten times. Twenty times if athletes only have sex with other athletes! I mean, shit, the last time I had sex twenty times it felt like my arm was gonna fall off.
Beijing provides 100,000 condoms for athletes [yahoonews]
Thanks to Hunter, who's smart enough to know the only good sports are safe sports.
Aug 25 2008 Cool, Neato!: iHologram iPhone Application
iHologram for the iPhone is an application made by David O'Reilly that creates the illusion of a 3-D cat walking around in your phone.
iHologram combines anamorphosis and the iPhone's gyroscopes to achieve this awesome visual magic trick. Anamorphosis is a way to draw things distorted so, while watched at a certain angle, they pop out of the 2D surface as if they were real.
You have to watch the screen at 35 to 45 degrees at all times in order for the effect to work. And, also, keep the phone charged. It won't work with a dead battery. Or hooker. Speaking of which, can I borrow somebody's car for the afternoon?
3D App Turns iPhone into Window to Alternative World [gizmodo]
Aug 25 2008 Han Solo Frozen In Carbonite Cake
Well folks, it's been a while since we've seen some Star Wars inspired deliciousness here on Geekologie, but at long last, the wait is over. A tipster sent in this Han Solo frozen in carbonite cake that his mom made for what was probably the kick-assiest birthday party ever. And as you can see, Han is looking delicious. I bet he'd go great with a "Solo" cup full of jungle juice! Get it? Because Solo is also a brand of cheap plastic cups. You know, the kind you play beerpong with. At sausage parties. Like the one I went to on Saturday. So yeah, whoever you were: I puked behind your couch.
Hit the jump for a couple close-ups of delicious Han.
Aug 25 2008 Two Vigilante Ninjas From New Jersey Try To Stop Drug Dealers, End Up Going To Jail
That isn't one of them in the picture. That's a hot female ninja, completely unrelated to the story, but a highly appropriate graphic nonetheless. Anyway, 22-year old Tadeusz Tertkiewicz and 19-year old Jesse Trojaniak were arrested in Clifton, New Jersey, for being the world's worst ninjas.
Calling themselves "Shinobi warriors," the men wore black SWAT-type vests and carried knives, throwing stars, swords, nunchucks and a bow and arrows.After being arrested early Wednesday in a car on Route 46, the men said they were delivering warning letters to drug dealers and drug users urging them to stop their "impure" activities.
The letters said those who persisted would be stopped with "justified yet, merciful force."
Wow. From an interview with one of the ninja failures:
First we tried sneaking around the bushes, but we couldn't because the bushes were too thick. So we went for the more subtle, just, um, like hit and run approach, where we'd just run in there, slap the letter, and just run out of there as quickly as possible.
Listen, I've got news for any of you would-be Shinobi warriors out there: If your stealthy mission is thwarted by a bush, guess what? You aren't a freaking ninja. Go home and nunchuck yourself in the vagina till you pass out.
Hit the jump for a picture of one of them, along with a link to the news video.
Aug 25 2008 The AirKick Gets You High, Wet
If you live in Germany you can rent an AirKick for an undisclosed amount of bratwurst. The human catapult (not to be confused with a human trebuchet) is capable of launching thrill-seekers 26 feet to a watery landing.
The participant sits in a specially constructed seat at the back end of the catapult arm and 3,2,1...Liftoff. He sets the device in motion himself by pushing a button. Approximately 60 liters of water are then forced through a rocket nozzle under the seat.
Awesome! I'm having them send one over here for testing, I'll report back.
UPDATE: Greetings from the ER! Not for use in the mall parking lot.
AirKick Human Water Catapult [ballerhouse]
via
AirKick human catapult slam-dunks brave riders [dvice]
Thanks Eric and Pat, but you could have warned me you know.
