Aug 8 2008 GoateeSaver Saves Goatee, Not Self Respect

The GoateeSaver looks like the thing they made Hannibal Lecter wear and protects your goatee while you shave in case you have the shakes or are prone to seizures. The $20 device has height and width adjustments (those three silver rollers) so it's one size adjusts to most. You just bite the attached bit, shave, and you're good to go. Except for my roommate, who just discovered I covered his bit with superglue. What's that? I can't understand a word you're saying, you look stupid as f***.

GoateeSaver, the grooming accessory for the clumsy, inept, or hungover [dvice]

Aug 8 2008 Walking With Dinosaurs: The Live Experience

Remember that BBC series Walking With Dinosaurs that featured CG dinosaurs wandering around eating and killing each other? Yeah, the one you'd get good and high before watching. Well now it's a live show, and it's coming on a 2-year tour of the U.S.! Maybe even to a city near you. Oh happy day!

Fifteen roaring, snarling "live" dinosaurs mesmerize the audience and are awe-inspiring as when they first walked the earth. The stars of the show include Tyrannosaurus Rex, Utahraptor, Stegosaurus, and the largest of them, the Brachiosaurus, which is 36 feet tall and 56 feet long from nose to tail.

The show depicts the dinosaurs' evolution spanning their entire 200 million year reign. The history of the world is played out with almost cinematic realism, including scenes of the daily interactions between dinosaurs. you will see how carnivorous dinosaurs evolved to walk on two legs, and how the herbivores fended off their more agile predators.

Okay, I know what you're thinking, "Wow, animatronic dinosaurs, big freaking deal. I don't even have kids to take." Well if that's what you thought you're clearly missing the point here. Which, obviously, is this: Sex. with. dinosaurs! Just saying, without a time machine it might be the best chance you've got.

Walking With Dinosaurs Official Site

Thanks fluffyabortion, I call dibs on the Stegosaurus.

Aug 8 2008 The Last Video Game Obama Played Was...

Pong. Jesus, at least lie and say Super Mario Galaxy. But to Obama's credit, when McCain was asked the same question he answered "rolling a hoop down a dirt road with a stick", which, to the best of my knowledge, isn't even a video game. So the question remains: can we really trust a president that hasn't killed a hooker in Grand Theft Auto? The prosecution rests.

Geekologie Writer '08: Totally not afraid to kill hookers.

Hit the link to read a little interview with Obama with other, similar questions, like who gets to control the remote in his house (answer: HGTV).

Barack Obama: My Pop-Culture Favorites [entertainmentweekly]

Thanks Craig, you can be my running mate.

Aug 8 2008 It's Paper!: Montauk Monster Mystery Solved

Remember Brian Chan? He's Geekologie's Folder In Residence. Well this morning he wrote to let me know he singlehandedly solved the Montauk Monster mystery: It's a single piece of folded paper! ZOMG, government conspiracy! This just proves the point I've been trying to make for awhile now: when there's no simple answer, blame the government. They're bound to have f***ed up somehow. And also, taxes. They make you pay them.

Hit the jump for a close-up and comparison shot showing the monster for what it really is.

Continue Reading " It's Paper!: Montauk Monster Mystery Solved "

Aug 8 2008 Questionable: Guy Makes 3-D Business Cards

Some guy named Emerson Taymor had himself some 3-D business cards made. It probably isn't a new idea, but hey, it's the first I've seen it. Regardless, I found them kind of questionable (even ignoring the goofy picture). Don't get me wrong: I love wearing 3-D glasses as much as the next guy that dropped acid with his bagel this morning, I'm just saying they seem gimmicky. But being the intrepid reporter that I am, I gave Emerson the benefit of the doubt. So I visited his website to find out what kind of act he performs for birthday parties that warrants such an unusual card, and hello placeholder! Wow Emerson, I don't even know if you can make balloon animals. But you have inspired me. To include a phone number on my business card that I may activate some time in the future.

Hit the jump for two more pictures of the 3-D cards in 2-D form.

Continue Reading " Questionable: Guy Makes 3-D Business Cards "

Aug 8 2008 Dark Knight Interrogation Scene Parody

This is a spoof of the interrogation scene from Dark Knight. One guy is actually playing both parts and it's moderately funny. Now I don't want to ruin it for you, but I'm going to anyways because I'm that kind of asshole -- Joker can't understand what Batman is saying because of the way he talks. BOOM -- spoiled! Oh shit, here comes another -- you were adopted.

Geekologie: Ruining lives and relationships since 2006.

Youtube

Thanks to Tony, Romeo, and Josh -- crimefighters that battle injustice the old fashioned way: in front of the computer. With a beerbelt.

Aug 7 2008 Seriously, What Could Go Wrong?: United States Military To Be 30% Robotic By 2020

The U.S. military has a goal -- that it's 30% robotic in twelve years. Why? Because robots don't feel pain, and when they die you just solder them back together or build a bitchin' chair out of the scrap metal.

While advances in robot technology will probably result in more radical robot designs and allow for the military's goal of a 30-percent robotic force, there will always be human involvement in the control process. Researcher Bill Smart had this to say about our future robot army:

"It's a chain of command thing. You don't want to give autonomy to a weapons delivery system. You don't want the robot to make the wrong decision."

Wow, somebody actually talking some sense for once. Clever, Bill. Or should I say smart? Get it? Because that's your last name. No, I'm not making fun of you. Jesus, it was a compliment you jackass.

Anyway, this whole human vs. robot for control of weapons systems is a real Catch 22 (love you Joseph). On the one hand, you don't want robots to have any control over anything, because all they want to do is kill us all and have oily robotic orgies. But on the other hand, you put a man in front of a giant red button that reads "DO NOT PUSH, THE WORLD WILL END" and 9 times out of 10 -- as soon as nobody's watching -- he's got his pants around his ankles and is mashing that thing with his dick like candy's gonna rain from the sky.

U.S. Military To Be 30 Percent Robotic In Twelve Years [io9]

Thanks to Karilyn, whose radiant beauty had originally distracted me from giving her credit for the tip.

Aug 7 2008 Giant Trackball: Ass-Assisted PC Peripheral

The Backball Chair is actually a giant trackball you can use to control a computer. Designed by Interaction Architecture, it was "specifically intended for use in public spaces like airports." Of course, because that makes perfect sense. Seriously, why use a mouse when you can roll your ass right off a giant trackball. Talk about a time-saver. Seriously though, I liked the idea enough to build one out of my spare testicle. My roommate just finished giving it a whirl, and I'm hoping for some positive feedback. So buddy, what'd you thi....WHY THE FUCK ARE THERE SKID MARKS ON MY TRACKBALL?

Backball chair lets you mouse by the seat of your pants [engadget]

Aug 7 2008 Sure, Why Not?: The How To Tie A Tie Tie

The HowTie from Fred is a tie that features pictorial instructions on how to tie the damn thing. Personally, I think they look like hieroglyphics, but I've never tied a tie before. And for the rest of you out there that can't, or don't want to learn, I've got two words for you: get a blogging job. We don't wear ties. Or pants. Hell, sometimes we don't even sport underwear. Isn't that right? Back me up here, Superficial and Iwatchstuff Writers. Whoa, too close! I meant verbally.

Product Site

Thanks to Britany, who once heckled me on the bus after work for not wearing drawls.

Aug 7 2008 Star Wars Wedding: A Match Made A Long Time Ago In A Galaxy Far, Far Away....

This is a picture from a recent Star Wars themed wedding. They went all out, and every single person at the ceremony was dressed up as a character or in Star Wars fashion. The marriage was even officiated by Princess Leia herself. Which totally explains why the groom decided to rock a Mon Calamari mask -- he was ogling those boobies during the ceremony! Well played sir, I like your style.

Hit the jump for a couple more MUST SEE pictures, including photographic evidence of my claim, the sweet AT-AT cake and Ewok cupcakes, a pretty wicked Han Solo, the obvious mother-in-law, and a much larger picture of Leia, you know, because I love you guys. There's also a link to the Flickr gallery, which contains over 1,200 photos of the event.

UPDATE: And did anybody else notice the freakish similarity between this picture and the Comic-Con picture in the So Freaking Cool section to the right?

Continue Reading " Star Wars Wedding: A Match Made A Long Time Ago In A Galaxy Far, Far Away.... "

Aug 7 2008 OMGWTFBBQ Casemod, Awesome!

Spotted at QuakeCon 2008, some guy modded his computer to fit inside a barbecue grill. It (as if you couldn't tell) is the awesome. I especially like how the cooling fans glow to simulate fire. Nice touch. Now I dare someone to slap their meat on it.

One more picture of the setup after the jump.

Continue Reading " OMGWTFBBQ Casemod, Awesome! "

Aug 7 2008 Luxeed Colorful Keyboards Now Available

We heard about the Luxeed Dyamic Keyboard a year ago, and now the rainbow peripherals are finally available, for $200. You can choose between a black model on which only the letters are illuminated, or a white one that has the entire keys light up. Every board has 430 LEDs and you can program each individual key's color and make lighting animations. Sure, you could use the thing for Photoshop shortcuts or colored gaming keys, but let's be honest -- this board is strictly for showing off. I mean, who doesn't want to be the first in the office with a rainbow keyboard? Unfortunately, it looks like The Superficial Writer beat me to it. Hey buddy, see you got the Luxeed, very cool. And....pink. Ha -- now that you mention it, it does match your skirt. And....dude are you wearing makeup?

Hit the jump for a video of the board in action.

Continue Reading " Luxeed Colorful Keyboards Now Available "

Aug 7 2008 Dark Knight PSAs With Batman And The Joker

This is a public service announcement featuring Batman and The Joker reminding you about the importance of wearing sunscreen. It's one of several announcements made by the Dark Knight and his arch-nemesis for the good of the public. I posted two more after the jump, one on bike safety and one about taking time out of your day to have fun. Unfortunately, there isn't one about the importance of staying in school. So kids: stay in school. You don't have to go to college, but I do recommend it if you want to experiment with drugs and alcohol.

Hit the jump for two more and a link to several others.

Continue Reading " Dark Knight PSAs With Batman And The Joker "

Aug 7 2008 We're All Gonna Die! (Just Kidding, Nothing To Worry About): Robots Learn How To Move

Despite their better judgment and several threatening letters from yours truly, researchers in Leipzig, Germany are writing software that allows robots to teach themselves how to move. This is great news.

The software mimics the interconnected sensing and processing of a brain in a so-called "neural network". Armed with such a network, the simulated creatures start to explore.

The network then sends out signals to move in a particular way, and predicts where it should end up, based on that movement. If it encounters an obstacle such as itself, a wall or the floor, the prediction is wrong, and the robot tries different moves, learning about itself and its environment as it does so.

This approach is far more flexible than traditional programming, in which movements are painstakingly planned out in a well-defined space. As conditions change, so can the robot's behavior.

Uh-huh. Now I'm not saying there's nothing to worry about here, but seriously folks, these robots could never figure out how to wield a knife or gun. And I'm not just saying that because I want plenty of robot-fodder standing around while I make my escape to the moon. Wait, yes I am. Gotta look out for #1.

Hit the jump for a video simulation of a dog learning to jump a fence and humanoid dancing.

Continue Reading " We're All Gonna Die! (Just Kidding, Nothing To Worry About): Robots Learn How To Move "

Aug 6 2008 Pure Class (And Alcohol): The Beer Belt

The Beer Belt costs $18 from Urban Outfitters and holds six cans or bottles. But I assume if you're buying this you'll be carrying bottles. And not just because they're classier (although they are), but to carry six cans, you just put your belt through a loop in one of those plastic 6-pack carriers that strangles birds. But whichever way you go, there's one thing for certain: you'll be looking damn good. And, depending on how fast you drink, chugging warm beers. Just saying, scientists invented ice for a reason.

The Beer Belt: A utility belt for your brewskies [dvice]

Aug 6 2008 Radiohead's House Of Cards In LEGO Form!

Remember Radiohead's House of Cards video that was shot with lasers instead of cameras and then all the data was made available to everyone to do whatever they wanted to with it? Well Ian Mackinnon took that data and rendered the video in 3D using LEGOs. Wicked! I embedded the video in high-quality because the low-quality one was looking kind of blurry, but it's still not super. But hey, we work with what we're given, don't we? You wouldn't ask someone you allegedly love to use a pump, would you? No, because you respect what they were given. Even if they are 26 cards short of a deck. HIYO -- card tie-in!

Radiohead's House of Cards Video Rendered In 3D Using Legos [gizmodo]

Aug 6 2008 Hail Explodes Out Of Man's Toilet While In Use

Austrian man Martin Bierbauer was minding his own business, you know, getting his crap on, possibly flipping through a magazine or dirty joke book, when KA-BOOM! -- he was ass-blasted off the toilet by a barrage of hailstones from the shitty depths.

"I heard the pipes rumbling a bit, and suddenly hailstones the size of golf balls started exploding out of the toilet like it was a popcorn machine. There was an avalanche of ice that quickly filled the toilet, then the entire flat, and eventually the entire building. I ran down the stairs with the hailstones following me, and other residents did the same."

The incident at the block of flats in Eisenstadt, the capital of the province of Burgenland, was caused by hailstones flooding into a local drain during a torrential downpour, which became blocked.

Local council spokesman Wolfgang Leinner said: "The pressure was too great, the hailstones had to go somewhere and they came out through the toilets it seems."

Haily shit.

Toilet rained giant hailstones to fill building [austriantimes]

Thanks to Kevin, who was using the john once when a Gremlin reached up and grabbed his balls.

Aug 6 2008 Star Trek Online Going Online, Sometime

Star Trek Online is going to be unveiled in a little over four days at the Star Trek Convention in Las Vegas (August 10th). Leonard Nimoy is set to make the announcement and show some actual gameplay footage. In case you were wondering, it's going to be a MMORPGLOLROTFLMFAO that takes place in the Star Trek universe. For those of you too lazy to go to the website:

Become part of Star Trek®: The Star Trek universe will appear for the first time in a massively multiplayer online game. Everything from the elegant domes of Starfleet Academy to the ancient temples of Vulcan, from the towers of Qo'noS to the Fire Caves of Bajor, from the mysterious Mutara Nebula to the unexplored voids of deep space, all will be represented in stunning 3-D graphics. Immerse yourself in the future of the Trek universe as it moves into the 25th century: a time of shifting alliances and new discoveries.

Adventure in the Final Frontier: Explore strange new worlds, seek out new life and new civilizations in an expanding vast universe. Make contact with alien races, discover resources and uncover mysteries that will change the future of the Star Trek universe.

You Are the Captain: Command your own starship as a Federation Captain or a Klingon Warrior. Outfit it with the systems that you need to make your mark in the galaxy. Customize your ship as you see fit. Recruit, train and mold your crew into an elite force for exploration and combat.

Boy am I excited. But truthfully, there's still only one way to play Star Trek, and that's dressed in a Starfleet jumpsuit you made out of your old highschool track uniform while sitting in a cardboard Enterprise. Want to play? Good, I'll be Geordi La Forge. Okay, now where the hell is my VISOR? Oh, great. Godammit woman, I told you that is NOT your hairband anymore, that's my freaking VISOR! I need it to see.

Star Trek Online

Thanks Zakkmiester, live long and prosper. And also, ass. Get a lot of ass.

Aug 6 2008 Election '08: Voting For Star Wars Characters

These are bunch of designs that you can get on t-shirts, hats, buttons, posters, mugs, mouse pads and Maxi-pads to show support for your favorite Star Wars character in the coming election. There are several more designs, and you can even customize them so that your name appears underneath the character's so it looks like you're their running mate. The shirts start around $18, and I'm totally all over the Han Solo/Chewie ticket. Could you imagine? Han would be blasting mad chicks in the Oval Office (always being courteous and shooting second). And Chewie, well Chewie would just grunt a lot. Making him the best VP ever.

Star Wars Election '08 Products

Thanks Serene, I love your name.

Aug 6 2008 Man Proposes Using Google Earth Street View

Google recently set up some new Street Views near the Googleplex company headquarters in California. And Google employee Michael Weiss-Malik used the opportunity to re-propose to his girlfriend. That's why his sign says "Proposal 2.0" -- he had already given a traditional proposal and the woman said yes.

My original proposal was quiet and low-key. It was just some simple heart-felt words exchanged during a quiet night at home. And while Proposal 1.0 had plenty of sentiment, it was lacking in pizazz. So I did what any Silicon Valley geek would do: I decided to upgrade to "Proposal 2.0," a new improved online version. I proposed to Leslie from inside a Google Street View panorama.

Wow, Michael, that's probably the most romantic story I've ever heard. Well, minus the one about the guy that proposed with a handgun. I do like this whole Proposal 2.0 business though. I've even been inspired to do make one to my fiancée. Baby, if you're reading this:

Proposal 2.0 -- This effectively voids proposal 1.0

Woot, freedom!

Marriage Proposal in Street View! [gearthblog]

Thanks to "because nothing says true love like not even being physically present for your proposal" Craig.

Aug 6 2008 James Bond Opening Played On Dormitory Windows, Also, The Snake Game!

Well we've already seen two different episodes of window Tetris, so it was only a matter of time till people starting branching out. The video above is the opening to James Bond films, and the one after the jump is of a game of Snake. You know, where you go around eating dots and growing longer. Yeah, that one. Hellafun. Both videos were made by a group of Polish college students (ZOMG -- it's a Polish computer! HAHAHAH....holy shit I'm racist.) Seriously though, could you imagine how awesome Grand Theft Auto 4 would look like played on those windows?

A. Totally rad!
II. The sickness!
C. Dude, are you retarded?
D. OMG, there's a naked chick changing in a lower-left window at 0:14!
4. Haha, just kidding.
5. Damn you, GW!

Hit the jump to see the Snake game, which features a little Pong action at the end too.

Continue Reading " James Bond Opening Played On Dormitory Windows, Also, The Snake Game! "

Aug 6 2008 Guy Builds Himself Batman's Tumbler

Bob Dullam went and built himself Batman's Tumbler using nothing but photos of the vehicle and the actual movies. It cost somewhere between $50,000-$70,000 to complete and was built entirely by himself. It looks freaking wicked. Good looking, Bob. Next, he plans to construct a Batpod. And, after that, I'm hoping he'll build me a deck.

Hit the jump for several more pictures.

Continue Reading " Guy Builds Himself Batman's Tumbler "

Aug 5 2008 Wake Up To Meat: The Wake N' Bacon

The Wake n' Bacon is a collaborative alarm clock design by Matty Sallin, Daniel Bartolini and Hsiao-huh Hsu. It wakes you up with the delicious scent of bacon instead of beeping. How?

A frozen strip of bacon is placed in Wake n' Bacon the night before. Because there is a 10 minute cooking time, the clock is set to go off 10 minutes before the desired waking time. Once the alarm goes off, the clock it sends a signal to a small speaker to generate the alarm sound. We hacked the clock so that the signal is re-routed by a microchip that in responds by sending a signal to a relay that throws the switch to power two halogen lamps that slow-cook the bacon in about 10 minutes.

Simple as that. No loud noises, no breaking your alarm, just delicious bacon. Now what you need to do is keep a mini-fridge by the bed so you can toss in another piece, hit snooze, and ten minutes later, more bacon. Toss in another piece, hit snooze, and ten minutes later, more bacon. Toss in another piece, hit snooze, and ten minutes later, more bacon. Toss in another piece, hit snooze, and ten minutes later you can't see your penis past your pork-gut anymore because you've been eating two pounds of bacon every morning.

Wake N' Bacon

Thanks Mac and Liz, now make one that can cook an egg and biscuit too.

Aug 5 2008 Eh: Multi-Touch 3D Hologram Display Is Here

This is a video of Obscura Digital demonstrating their multi-touch software with Musion's Eyeliner 3D holographic projector. It's pretty neat. But you know what? I'm getting sick and tired of all these multi-touch demos where it seems the extent of what you can so is shuffle through photos and resize them. BORING. Show me somebody building a LEGO castle or something. Anything -- anything besides "look, you can toss Polaroids around in space!" I mean I can do that in real life, and it would still suck. I want to see some VR applications. I need an escape damnit, and the drugs aren't working.

Obscura Digital projects multi-touch "hologram", blows all sorts of minds [engadget]

Thanks to Julian, who's anxiously awaiting holographic skin flicks.

Aug 5 2008 Um, Yeah: A Questionable New Energy Drink

Well folks, it happened. Somebody went and named their energy drink after a slang term for a woman's nether region. Or a cat. The one that starts with p and ends with ussy. Yep. This is almost as bad as the German Poontang Juice.

(Our product) is unique. It is made with a blend of fresh white grape juice from Southern Italy, pressed Mexican limes and lightly carbonated water. These are then mixed with Grenadilla and Lychee flavours, infused with six selected botanical herbs.

The name Pussy shocks and demands attention - that's the point. Inhibition is a recipe for mediocrity.

Oh really? Well it looks like you may have settled for a little mediocrity yourself there, Pussy. Because I just concocted my own drink, and Assf*** is gonna take the energy supplement market by storm. From behind.

Hit the jump if you really want to see the can without the censor bar, and a link to the product page.

Continue Reading " Um, Yeah: A Questionable New Energy Drink "

Aug 5 2008 Hooray, More Eye Candy!: The Vader Project

Well this must be your lucky day. Not one but two delicious eye candy galleries for you today on Geekologie. First were the SDCC costumes, and now, handpainted Darth Vader helmets. The Vader Project , a "reimagining of the iconic Darth Vader helmet by some of today's hottest pop and underground artists", was recently on display at Star Wars Celebration Japan. A lot of them are pretty cool. Hit the jump to see of my favorites, along with several links to tons more. No need to thank me folks, just doing my job. Now somebody organize a Leia Project. I'm thinking about that golden bikini. And, guilty by association, boobs.

Hit the jump for the gallery and links to tons more pictures.

Continue Reading " Hooray, More Eye Candy!: The Vader Project "

Aug 5 2008 Just Because: A Tesla Coil Guitar Amp

Well we've seen Tesla coils making music before, and we've even seen a pretty wicked plasma speaker, and now -- a Tesla coil guitar amp. Unfortunately, I don't have any more information on the thing, so I'll make some up. The device was actually constructed by the thunder god Thor out of a welded hemorrhoid donut he discarded after his ass was all better. They'll be available as mods for the latest Guitar Hero and Rock Band games, and exposure to the arc has been proven to regrow hair, but only if you lick it with a mouthful of Pop Rocks.

Tesla Coil Guitar Amp: Ride the lightning [dvice]

Aug 5 2008 I Want: This Periodic Coffee Table

This $8,550 Periodic Coffee Table features actual samples of all 92 naturally occurring elements.

By embedding all element samples in clear acrylic, they are beautifully presented and also protected from tarnishing. This format also helps to addresses health and safety issues, as all potentially toxic or corrosive substances are permanently encased in a thick layer of robust resin. Argon gas and mineral oil is further used to ampoule reactive samples and preserve their freshly cut appearance.

Sweet, but back when I went to school there were only a few elements: earth, wind, water, fire, and aether (which I always felt was a bullshit element to begin with). Anyways, I failed a test once because I wrote rain, sleet, snow, hail and tornadoes. I demanded partial credit, but my professor refused. So you know what I did? I got elemental on his ass. Specifically, I set his car on fire.

Hit the jump for some closeups and a link to the product page.

Continue Reading " I Want: This Periodic Coffee Table "

Aug 5 2008 Presidential Candidates Get Own Comics

Barack Obama and that other presidential candidate whose face looks like a gnarled tree trunk (EDIT: Wrong John -- I was thinking Kerry, this guy is actually McCain) will star in their own comics made by IDW Publishing, a San Diego comic book company.

Don't expect Captain America-versus-Superman hijinks or super-villains threatening the electoral process. Trading sound bites for word balloons, the books purport to tell McCain and Obama's life stories, independently researched and illustrated by a veteran team of writers and artists.

"We're not doing anything that is sensational here," said IDW special projects editor Scott Dunbier, adding that neither campaign was involved in the development of the books. "We're sticking to the facts."

Wow, these are gonna be the boringest comics ever. Sure McCain spent five years as a POW in North Vietnam, but that's about the only riveting detail. At least give the man a cape and anti-aging serum.

NOTE: The Geekologie Writer does not endorse political candidates. Political candidates endorse him!

McCain: The Geekologie Writer is great. He's made me shoot Diet Pepsi Zero out my nose and shit my pants at the same time before. Also, ladies, topless photos are the only way to the man's heart.
Obama: The Geekologie Writer once told me a dirty joke. It was funny. I can't remember exactly how it went, something about a penis walking into a bar. Hilarious.

McCain, Obama to star in their own comic books [msnbc]

Thanks to Emma for being a Wonder Woman.

Aug 5 2008 Eye Candy: Massive Gallery Of The Best San Diego Comic Con Costumes, WHEEEEEEE!

This is a massive gallery of SDCC costumes from Maximum PC's coverage of the event. I picked out about 20 of my favorites, but they have over 400, so make sure to check them out if you want to see even more. But the ones I chose are some of the awesomest. Hit the jump to find Vader, Two-Face, a bunch of others, and tons of hot chicks. But what you won't find is the blue-unitard guy. Because I already snuck him in yesterday.

Hit it for the gallery.

Continue Reading " Eye Candy: Massive Gallery Of The Best San Diego Comic Con Costumes, WHEEEEEEE! "

Aug 4 2008 Warwick Davis Responds To Accusation That Ewoks Ruined Return Of The Jedi

Interesting screencap there. Anyway, this is a video from part of Disney's Star Wars Weekends (which included the now-infamous character dance-off). It features Warwick Davis (the guy that played Wicket the Ewok and Willow) responding to the accusation that Ewoks ruined Return of the Jedi because George Lucas turned them into giant teddy bears to sell more toys. If you haven't already watched it, I'm about to spoil it for you right now: It was staged and turns into a giant song and dance about the Ewoks. Which made me question everything I know about Ewoks and my sexuality. Which isn't much: I got my shit stuck in a can of Red Bull over the weekend.

Hit the jump for a video of the song without having to watch it on a screen why Wicket sings along.

Continue Reading " Warwick Davis Responds To Accusation That Ewoks Ruined Return Of The Jedi "

Aug 4 2008 Spiderman Costume Replica On eBay

There's a pretty realistic looking Spiderman costume for sale on eBay right now. I'd bid on it, but the seller doesn't look very trustworthy (81.3% positive feedback). So if you do bid, be warned: they'll probably only send you a stained bedsheet.

This costume is one of the best replicas out there. 1 piece suit just like the movie. Made of great quality stretch lycra which has had the movie pattern printed directly into the fabric. Printed through process called dye-sublimation. Fabric color saturation is great and very movie realistic. Features muscle shading and brick pattern on the whole suit. Has complete brick pattern in the blues which is in most prints and replicas is lost in the darker shaded areas.

Eye frames are made from gun metal gray resin. The lenses are 3 layers. a layer of clear plastic, a layer of super fine metal mesh, and another layer of clear plastic. The also have an airbrushed gradient around the edge to give that "movie look".

Photographs great. 3D Webs are 2 layers of acrylic. 1st black then silver laid over the top to give a movie accurate look. Features 3 zippers. 2 that go down and meet in the center under the belt and one on the back of the head. Aqua shoe sewn in would fit someone w/ around size8-11 shoe size. Suit made to fit someone around 5'7'-5'11 w/ an average build.

The bidding is already at $1,000 with more than six days remaining, so it's probably gonna go for a small fortune. Which, honestly, isn't worth it just to have a cool Halloween costume. For that kind of money the damn thing better let me crawl up buildings. Or at the very least make my Spidey senses tingle. I'm talking about my loins. Now that would be a Spiderman suit. Now who here knows how to sew?

Hit the jump for a bunch more pictures, the last of which you have to see, along with a link to the auction.

Continue Reading " Spiderman Costume Replica On eBay "

Aug 4 2008 Plastinkuzz: Questionable DJ Scratchers

Plastinkuzz are little stereoscopic cards that you scratch and allegedly sound like a real record. That, of course, is debatable. They're made by Art Lebedev, and come in a variety of color combinations, because that's important. Hit the jump to see said color options and a very worthwhile video that, if you make it all the way through, you win a prize. Now I hate to ruin a surprise, but your prize is one minute and twenty-eight seconds stolen from your life (kind of like "the Machine" in The Princess Bride, but far less cool). Seriously though, I've been playing the Plastinkuzz since I was a kid. Except back then we called them corduroys. I had the jacket and the pants.

Hit the jump for one more picture and a video you really should at least watch the first ten seconds of -- the second guy is hilarious.

Continue Reading " Plastinkuzz: Questionable DJ Scratchers "

Aug 4 2008 Adidaz Hellbeezy Sheeziez Comin' Zoon

Sorry, but I had a bet with a coworker I couldn't use five Z's in a post title. I think it went pretty well, don't you? Barely noticeable. So, Adidas is dropping two new pairs of Hellboy inspired footwear. Those are the two different styles there. They're both limited editions and will be priced around $150. Take a close look at that bottom pair. What do they look like? If you guessed that pair of tight, black vinyl pants I used to wear during my raving days, you guessed correct. You know, the ones that melted to me when I got too close to the bonfire. You ever peeled melted plastic off your junk? It's worse than a burning marshmallow.

Hit the jump for one more picture of the sneakers on top of a shoebox!

Continue Reading " Adidaz Hellbeezy Sheeziez Comin' Zoon "

Aug 4 2008 Legit Looking: Handheld Super Nintendo

This is a handheld Super Nintendo made by some guy that frequents the BenHeck forums (Ben Heck being that guy that's always modding the hell out of controllers). As you can see, it's looking pretty sleek. Way sleeker than the portable Gamecube, and of equal sleekiosity to this Dreamcast. But how does it compare to its wooden brethren? Well that's up to your personal taste. And feel. Some pirates prefer a modern, plastic prosthetic when they lose a leg in battle, but I'm a purist -- pegleg all the way. Oh shit, and a parrot. Gotta have a parrot. And it should be able to cuss. And have a patch-eye and a tattoo of a naked mermaid. Otherwise, you aren't a freaking pirate, you're just an exotic pet owner with a missing leg.

Hit the jump for a couple more views, including one from the rear.

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Aug 4 2008 The Shining: Now With More Robots!

I don't really like scary movies because I pissed myself in the theater during Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone and all my friends still make fun of me. But I did happen to see The Shining in my youth. Remember the tricycle scene (if you don't I posted the original after the jump)? Well this is that scene recreated with the only thing that could possibly make it scarier -- robots. Now I'm not gonna say watching it made me pull a Potter here in my cube, but it did. And, uh-oh, I think a little WALL-E might have snuck out as well.

Hit the jump for the original scene from the movie.

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Aug 4 2008 'The Joker' Tries To Steal Movie Posters From Local Theater, Fails, Gets Himself Arrested

Spencer Taylor, a 20-year old from Three Rivers, Michigan, dressed up as The Joker and tried to steal a bunch of Dark Knight movie posters and cardboard cutouts at a local theater.

At the time of his arrest, Taylor was wearing a purple suit and had made his face up with white foundation and red lipstick to resemble the character played by the late Heath Ledger, who played the comic book villain in the blockbuster, before his untimely death earlier this year.

Police made Taylor pose for his mugshots both in and out off costume. He has been charged with larceny and malicious destruction of property.

Wow, way to suck, Spencer. On a related note, some guy dressed as the Dragon Emperor from the new Mummy movie stole a Brendan Fraser poster and everyone just felt sorry for him.

Hit the jump to see The Aborted Joker without makeup and a picture of the real one.

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Aug 4 2008 Montauk Monster: Interview, Speculation

Well forks -- can I call you forks? Good, anyway my loyal sporks, the Montauk Monster mystery has been solved. Turns out it was my sister. Haha, Tracey -- that's what you get for mom and dad always loving you more. Fine, so nobody has identified what the hell the beast is yet. But there is another picture, along with three horrible Photoshop fakes (all included after the jump for your FAKE!ing pleasure). Oh, and an interview with the three women that found the thing. They say they've got the corpse decomposing in a box at a friend's place. SICK! And also, start the grill. I'd really believe this was all a hoax if the three chicks seemed mentally capable of tying their shoes. But they're not. I think they're Velcro girls. So, my spoony friends, check out all the media after the jump and draw your own conclusions. But remember -- even bloated, fugly monsters need love. Isn't that right, Tracey? HOLY MOTHER OF....PUT YOUR BAG BACK ON BEFORE I HIT YOU WITH A STICK!

Hit the jump for a new picture, three obvious Photoshoppings, and a painful interview with three life failures.

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