Jul 30 2008Drinking Buddy: Malaysian Pen-Tailed Shrew

Well folks, I've found myself a new drinking buddy. The Malaysian pen-tailed shrew subsists entirely on fermented nectar from the pertam palm plant, which can be as high as 3.8 percent alcohol.
A new study found that the tiny animal subsists on a diet roughly equivalent to 100 percent beer... Amazingly, though the tree shrews drink like fish, they don't seem to get drunk. The researchers, led by Frank Wiens of Germany's University of Bayreuth, videotaped regular nocturnal feeding sessions and followed the movements of radio-tagged tree shrews. Though they measured blood-alcohol concentrations in the animals higher than those in humans with similarly high alcohol intake, the tree shrews showed no signs of intoxication.
Well folks, no sense hiding it now -- I had sex with a shrew. The pen-tailed variety, dear reader, is my progeny.
Tiny tree shrew can drink you under the table [msnbc]
Thanks to Chad, the only man who's ever come close to beating my pen-tailed progeny in a drinking contest.
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Reader Comments
1. Flawless - July 30, 2008 12:24 PM
OMFG AGGA 1ST LULULU
2. Uncle Eccoli - July 30, 2008 12:28 PM
I wonder if this discovery will lead to anti-intoxicants.
3. Icon - July 30, 2008 12:31 PM
That's exactly what I was thinking while reading it Eccoli. I'd still wager I can put down more Jeager before the little tyke falls over dead. TAKE THAT SMALL CUTE MAMMAL!
pwned.
4. Sboy - July 30, 2008 12:40 PM
It'd make a really cool pet, and an even better drinking buddy~
Just imagine, going to the bar with your friends, and you pulling him out of your pocket, then giving him some budweiser, heineken, coors, molson, carlsberg, guiness or whatever, and the furry creature downing it like no tommorrow..... Now that would be cool!!!
5. el - July 30, 2008 12:50 PM
i'm wondering what the nectar tastes like.
...and where i can buy a pen-tailed shrew.
6. SmokingGirl - July 30, 2008 12:52 PM
Awwwww, it's so cute.
I wonder if it likes vodka?
7. Michael Bolton - July 30, 2008 12:52 PM
OM NOM NOM NOM
8. Adri Leya - July 30, 2008 1:02 PM
Nummies!!!
9. robin - July 30, 2008 1:18 PM
awesome! i love little drunks!!
10. enigma - July 30, 2008 1:19 PM
Yup, he looks like a drinker...
Did anyone consider that the tail helps him balance so he just doesn't look so drunk walking around?? :D
11. suzy blue balls - July 30, 2008 1:41 PM
i wonder how many more of these furry little bastards i gotta eat? i dont even feel buzzed yet.
12. Paris 'Rev' Battle - July 30, 2008 2:28 PM
I ran across the same article yesterday, and made this little dude my company mascot. Congratulations to evolution's big winner!
For further ruminations on animals and alcohol: memeticpress.com
13. CD - July 30, 2008 7:14 PM
Dude, your title. Is it supposed to be "Malasian" or "Malaysian"?
14. marlo - July 30, 2008 7:56 PM
I can't believe nobody's mentioned Bender from Futurama yet.
15. bcyuid - July 30, 2008 8:34 PM
I saw many people are discussing this on the forum of black dating site called *******Blackcentury dot com********。 You may go there to check it if you are interested. Maybe you can meet your life partner there.
16. Measly - August 1, 2008 10:44 AM
Apparently Sboy drinks piss water - i would have to mention Ruination... or WipeOut... or Arrogant Bastard..... or a hundred other beers that arent made from piss....
17. animalover - February 27, 2009 5:01 PM
HA HA!! I can see it's penis!