Jul 3 2008Chinese Military Prepares For Olympics
So your good buddy The Geekologie Writer got what is known in the medical field as "fucked the fuck up" last night because his wife made the mistake of going out of town for the holiday weekend. He hit wing night, drank like 300 beers, and then proceeded to sing "Ring Of Fire" at karaoke (he has a deep, sexy voice just like Cash). Good times. His hands are still shaking. Anyway, this is a picture of the Chinese military during a rapid deployment exercise in preparation for the upcoming Olympics. Because, let's face it, nothing says "I'm going for the gold!" like military personnel dry humping Segways.
Thanks Guillaume, I did a Segway once, but it was nothing compared to a Hoveround.
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Reader Comments
1. Uncle Eccoli - July 3, 2008 11:48 AM
LOL Would-be troublemakers are quaking in their boots, no doubt.
2. chaz - July 3, 2008 11:55 AM
damn the chinese military is so cruel, look at that, they dont even let their own take a piss before they get on those things. poor bastards.
3. Julian - July 3, 2008 11:55 AM
that's the funniest damn picture I've seen all day. and I have to photoshop pictures of the Superficial writer's mom for a living.
BB guns and segweys? that's the most intimidating police force on planet.
4. Guillaume - July 3, 2008 12:45 PM
Finally somewhere where I can share my vision of a grander humanity!
Thanks geekologie!
5. soft boner - July 3, 2008 12:47 PM
So how do they move to the side to avoid an incoming fire bottle? Reminds me of soldiers from the Revolutionary War... stood side by side in plain view of the enemy (all proper-like), waiting for their turn to shoot at the enemy. I learned all of this from the movie "Patriot" of course.
6. mike - July 3, 2008 12:53 PM
i like how everybody has these dinky little pew-pew BB guns, and then the guy in the background on the left has a friggin AK, and the guy in the background in the center has, damn, I don't even want to know what he's packin. looks like something that could launch grenades.
7. The Imaginary Reviewer - July 3, 2008 1:09 PM
It looks like a home-made version of Star Wars: Episode 1 to me.
8. Momboelitist - July 3, 2008 1:39 PM
Fake!!!!
9. emily - July 3, 2008 2:07 PM
Looks like a bunch of scary Asian Gobs. (cue "Final Countdown")
10. damn luddites - July 3, 2008 2:53 PM
those aren't tiny little guns. they're full sized guns being held by the new Chinese giant mutant police force
11. Elmo - July 3, 2008 2:56 PM
Are they shitting? What are they doing?!!
12. Clinch - July 3, 2008 3:11 PM
They're squatting like that so they can hold the segway-handle-stick-thing between their legs, which leaves their hands free for aiming the gun.
And I don't think the police should handle Olympic security, I think the contestants should.
A purse snatcher can easily outrun a cop, but against a dozen Olympic sprinters, they're done for. And on the off chance they can outrun them, that where the javelin throwers come in.
13. elboroto - July 3, 2008 3:43 PM
Agree with number 12. That's what javelin throwers are really for.
14. Irish Tenors - July 3, 2008 5:17 PM
Are you sure this picture wasn't taken during their recess?
15. guate6 - July 3, 2008 6:04 PM
Luddites: nice
#12: agreed
16. woodhorse - July 3, 2008 7:00 PM
They are really not making it attractive to go out in public anymore. Pretty soon the Deux ex Machina will make us show our embedded citizen ID chips just to go to the grocery store.
What I wanna know is: where is John Q. Public's defense for all this?
17. dr. blah - July 4, 2008 8:08 AM
do they know a phenomenon called "recoil"?
18. Neisseria - July 8, 2008 2:01 AM
I like how they all have these little guns then the guy in the background has a huge rifle.
19. DUDE - July 9, 2008 11:32 PM
What happens when the batteries run out?