Jun 17 2008Robotic Girlfriend For Lonely Men Seems Highly Questionable, Lowly Statured
E.M.A. (Eternal Maiden Actualization, seriously?) is a 15-inch Japanese robot developed by SEGA to keep lonely men company and help combat loneliness and depression. She'll cost about $175 and hits the streets (like a hooker!) in September.
Using her infrared sensors and battery power, the diminutive damsel named "EMA" puckers up for nearby human heads, entering what designers call its "love mode."She's very lovable and though she's not a human, she can act like a real girlfriend."
EMA, which stands for Eternal Maiden Actualization, can also hand out business cards, sing and dance, with Sega hoping to sell 10,000 in the first year.
Ah yes, the 15-inch robotic girlfriend. Listen, a girlfriend made out of plastic and metal, no matter how much you inflate her, just isn't a real girlfriend. Even if she comes with vibration modes and "life-like" parts, it's just not the same. Trust me. And this little robot is no different. Although, for the sake of science, I will suspend disappointment and give her a go.
UPDATE: Cleanup in aisle The Bed! Little bits of plastic everywhere. That robot is a freak in the sack! Highly recommended. SEGA, I'm gonna need a replacement. And, well, another Dreamcast. The robot broke before I was finished and I wanted to keep the experience all SEGA.
Japan makes robot girlfriend for lonely men [msnbc]
Thanks Matt and Ro, I've never been more scared of a little robotic woman before.
Reader Comments
1. Gab - June 17, 2008 5:18 PM
F1RST!
2. Sophie - June 17, 2008 6:15 PM
Does she scream out Seeeeeeeeegaaaaaaaaaa when she cums?
3. The Imaginary Reviewer - June 17, 2008 6:47 PM
Wow, we've come a long way since Barbarella, haven't we? What? Oh.
4. SmokingGirl - June 17, 2008 7:08 PM
Oh me so horny, oh, oh me so horny, oh me so horny, me love you long time.
Yea...no, this is sad. Seeeeeeeeeggggggggaaaaaaaaa...
Man: Did you miss me, honey?
Robot: Sure, why not.
Man: I heard, um, you yelling sega as I was coming up the drive.
Robot: So? I can't yell sega now just for the fun of it?
Man: Well you usually only do that after you and I have awkward sex because I have no idea how to have sex with a woman.
Robot: *mumbles* Tell me about it...
Man: What?
Robot: Nothing.
Man: Do I satisfy you? And be honest.
Robot: You just said that we have awkward sex...now you're asking if I'm satisfied? I think you can answer your own question.
Man: So you're faking it? *sighs* I knew it. Why couldn't you just tell me? Why did you have to lie?
Robot: Because I'm a robot, that's why.
Man: That does...
Robot: Alright! You know what? I've been doing everyone in this dinky apartment complex in the hopes of having a real orgasm; and I finally had a real one today.
Man: By...by who?
Robot: Ping Pong, the chick downstairs.
Man: I, eh? Who? A chick?
Robot: Yes, a chick...I'm a lesbian and I'm running away with her.
Man: Noooooooooooooooooooooooo!
Turn in next time for the conclusion of "This is my Robot" on the CW.
5. blp - June 17, 2008 7:08 PM
I read up to "she can act like a real girlfriend" and must comment now. Why would you pay for a little robot that you can't have sex with, spends most of it's time on the phone and when it's not on the phone never shuts the f*** up talking to you! It's 15 inches high FFS. I'm not putting the work in to make the kitchen sink that low!
6. prewife - June 17, 2008 8:21 PM
Now that is sexy plastic! This reminds me of "Gigolo Joe" From "AI"
Hmmm, I think I need one. Hope the http://prewife.com doesn't find out about it!
7. Grievousfish - June 17, 2008 8:30 PM
Guys, look at the plus side. It has the one thing that we all wish women had - an off switch!
8. Mistrious Strangler - June 17, 2008 9:04 PM
@Grievousfish:
ZING!
9. Meaty Urologist - June 17, 2008 9:25 PM
That thing blows the bagel toaster I was using out of the water!
10. nathalie - June 17, 2008 10:29 PM
it reminds me of a japanese music video from a while back:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FEDXhla1cuM
11. The Imaginary Reviewer - June 17, 2008 10:47 PM
#9: You were using a bagel toaster in water? How did you not get electrocuted?
12. Magicbones - June 17, 2008 11:02 PM
Hey, I dig your blog, man. I stumbled across it through a friend and laugh like Richard Simmons every time I stop in. Come see me at magicbones.blogspot.com if you're in the neighborhood.
13. Eddie - June 17, 2008 11:08 PM
This is just a freaky toy for creepy men. I will kill any one I know who would buy this and there damn Robot.
Kill all Robots!!
Down with the machines!!!
14. Eddie - June 17, 2008 11:08 PM
This is just a freaky toy for creepy men. I will kill any one I know who would buy this and there damn Robot.
Kill all Robots!!
Down with the machines!!!
15. Reg - June 17, 2008 11:47 PM
Hahah man SEGA is a tight company. BUt this is far beyond gay.
16. Joey - June 18, 2008 12:20 AM
Looks like Japanese men like their women calf-heavy. And I don't even want to get into the complications that could happen with those crazy arm cables.
BAD JU-JU!
17. Andrea - June 18, 2008 1:26 AM
mmm.... "sega" in Italian means also "handjob"... on this context is very approriated, even though I believe this thingy don't do that.
18. Smartass - June 18, 2008 9:49 AM
"she can act like a real girlfriend"
"kisses on command"
How the hell is THAT like a REAL girlfriend?!?
Computers can't be programmed to give mixed signals and say one thing but mean another or pout because you did something that you didn't know was wrong.
I submit to you that a REAL robot girlfriend can never be built.
19. Momboelitist - June 18, 2008 10:07 AM
*Whoosh*
20. radlad - June 18, 2008 2:34 PM
Funniest post I've read in a long time. I love Geekologie!!!!
21. Rozle - June 19, 2008 10:33 PM
OK....................... i think i needs her more than anyone here, i have the worst luck with women ,every time i try to go out with someone they always reject me i don't know why it really sucks being lonely. every time i ask a girl out she would says no i dont know what to do im working on a android so i wont be so lonely its not working out though i dont know what to use for a brain thats the only thing missing heh heh heh any one want to give up their brain!!! any way i need one where can i get one does any one know how to get one....................P.S. my English isnt good.