Jun 3 2008Great, They Learned How To Do It: Robot Sex
Paul Granjon is the sadistic bastard responsible for teaching these robots how to procreate. They were programmed with five modes and act differently in each. The different modes follow:
Normal: the robots roam around and run into walls
Sing: the robots continue to putt around and run into walls, but beep occasionally
In Heat: the robots try to find each other so they can do it, once located, they go for it
Sleep: after mating, the male looks for a dark place to nap while the female chases him and attempts to cuddle
Battery Alert: worn out by the female's constant nagging, the male beeps loudly before it dies
There you have it, hit the jump to watch the video, but skip to about 1:30 to start watching the different modes, and to 2:30 to actually see them do it. Just a warning: it's every bit as disturbing as you think it'll be. And not because it's two robots having sex, but because Mr. Granjon is so into two robots having sex.
Hit it for the YCPWAW (you can probably watch at work) video.
Sex Robots Are Less Sexy Than You'd Think [gizmodo]
Thanks Shawn, you smash the male and I'll, uh, take care of the female
Reader Comments
1. poopoo - June 3, 2008 3:35 PM
but, I don't want to be first...
2. dandaman - June 3, 2008 3:38 PM
that is by far the most pointless thing i have ever seen in my entire life...i hate the french
3. SmokingGirl - June 3, 2008 3:38 PM
Mmmmmmkay...(that was from South Park's Mr. Macky).
4. spectreman - June 3, 2008 3:44 PM
If the robots could also drink cheap beer, this would be the perfect representation of a college frat party.
5. Matt - June 3, 2008 4:37 PM
@4 hilarious
Also, this guy is genius! if we make it so robots have to have sex it will delay their take over and enslavement of the human race! If they have to knock boots every few hours, we can catch them while they are bumping ugly and blow them up!
6. Katsin X - June 3, 2008 6:45 PM
Thank you, SG. I feel honored to have changed (see: enhanced) your posting etiquette. Now, bake me a blackberry pie, and the crust better not be soggy this time.
7. SmokingGirl - June 3, 2008 9:39 PM
How about you bake your own damn blackberry pie? And the only good pie is pumpkin pie...
8. MoTT - June 3, 2008 11:58 PM
Burn Venice!!!!!!
9. Lindsay - June 4, 2008 2:06 AM
I actually thought it was kind of gross when they were doing it
10. Cyberwulf - June 4, 2008 2:48 AM
Yaknow, I can make a killer pumpkin cheesecake. It's absolutely orgasmic.
11. Tyler - June 4, 2008 3:28 AM
now he just needs to teach the phallic robot to last longer
12. iota1 - June 4, 2008 3:37 AM
The "put, put, put" sound they generate as they move about is great.
13. SmokingGirl - June 4, 2008 12:23 PM
Pumpkin cheesecake you say? I'm, um, orgasmic just thinking about that, Cyberwulf. We should get together sometime and, uh, bake stuff...yea, bake stuff.
14. Popadopolis - June 4, 2008 2:44 PM
I can't see the video, but I'm going to just guess that Tyler's (hilarious) comment was accurate. Now if only someone could teach me... errm, I mean my friend, the same skill.
15. Boinkin' - June 5, 2008 5:39 PM
That's a really small plastic penor. Obviously modeled after the robot creator.
16. guate6 - June 5, 2008 11:10 PM
At first, I felt a bit like a voyeur watching the video...strange.
SG: I have a recipe for Pumpkin Flan. I agree though, pumpkin pie is amazing, and pumpkin cheesecake is too.
"the intercourse mode ends when one of the robots switches off from the 'in heat' mode and disengages." ...I bet it's the "female" robot more often than not.
Other than that, I really don't know what else to say about the French guy's robots :\
17. v - June 9, 2008 7:25 PM
That was the quickest sex I've ever seen. What, is the male robot a premie?