Jun 13 2008 The Anger Release Machine Breaks Things
Let's face it, sometimes you're going apeshit and the only thing that'll make you feel better is breaking something. Enter the Anger Release Machine. It's a vending machine created by artists Katja Kublitz and Ronnie Yarisal that's filled with china. You just insert your money, choose a delicate porcelain object, and then watch it smash to smithereens in the bottom. That feels good, doesn't it? Hell yes it does. And so does screaming at your laptop. ISN'T THAT RIGHT YOU STUPID BLUE-SCREENING PIECE OF SHIT!? Oh yeah, that's the stuff.
Anger Release Machine, Spend Change, Smash China [uberreview]
Jun 13 2008 Smera Electric Car Concept Is Mad Skinny
The Lumeneo Smera is an electric car concept that's 8 feet long but only 31 inches wide (insert something about your penis here). It can reach 80 MPH and gets about 93 miles to a charge. Not too shabby.
Both of the front wheels on the Smera have their own 20hp electric motor which have a life expectancy of around 200,000 km. Those electric motors, as well as the rest of the vehicle, are all powered by a 144 volt lithium ion battery which weighs in at 180lbs.
The company is hoping to garner enough interest in the project to have models available for sale by the Paris Motor Show in October. Unfortunately, they'll be going for $30,000 - $46,000 and disintegrate if you get sideswiped, leaving you Smera'd (!) all over the road. HAHA! Okay, one nut punch, I deserve it.
Jun 13 2008 New Roller Coaster Features 97 Degree Drop
The New Fahrenheit roller coaster at Hershey Park in Pennsylvania features a 97 degree drop at the beginning. That's 7 degrees past vertical (see picture: right side, where the track curves back in). At the bottom of the drop riders experience 4 G's and then puke and/or passout. The two minute ride is being billed as the steepest and most severe in the United States and the coaster just opened on May 24th. I'm not riding it. And not because I don't love roller coasters (I do), but because of this quote from Popular Mechanics:
(Talking about the testing of the ride) First, engineers load the trains full of heavy water dummies, to figure out how the cars will behave when they're at capacity. The rules say you need 100 hours of this testing, but engineers at the park said they would run over 1,000 rides before people got on the coaster.
Stop the presses. If the ride is 2 minutes long and you run 1,000 rides, that's, uh, only 33 hours and 20 minutes of testing. You weren't the same engineers that designed the ride are you? You don't say. Say, if you wouldn't mind unstrapping me, I'd like to get the f*** off this thing before I make a little chocolate of my own.
Another picture and the video after the jump.
Continue Reading " New Roller Coaster Features 97 Degree Drop "
Jun 13 2008 Guy Scores Himself A DWI On Cooler Scooter
Well folks, they finally got me. After months of (relatively) incident free cooler scooting around town, I finally scored my first DWI while doing 13 MPH down the sidewalk.
Leslie J. "Bomber" Marr, 57, was charged with driving while intoxicated and aggravated unlicensed operation of a motor vehicle after the police saw him swerving on the street and driving on the sidewalk in his "Cruzin Cooler," Whitehall Police Chief Richard LaChapelle told the Post Star newspaper.Marr's electric-powered cooler was filled with 14 beers and has room for 24 cans and ice, Fox News reported.
These jackasses have the story all wrong. First off, my name is Leslie J. "Mad Bomber" Marr, and secondly, there were only 12 beers left because I slammed two before the cop got out of his car.
Under New York state law, driving any motorized vehicle must be done without alcohol, including motorized coolers. In various states, other modes of transportation in which driving is prohibited while intoxicated include lawnmowers, boats, bicycles, golf carts, wheelchairs and horses.
Wow, no drunk wheelchairing, huh? Why don't we just go the extra mile and make being handicapped illegal too?
Man Gets DWI After Riding Motorized Cooler [wgal]
Thanks Jacob, now everyone's gonna make fun of me
Jun 13 2008 Oh Great, We're Doomed: British Complete Skynet Network, Actually Calling It Skynet
Well folks, it's the beginning of the end. With the launch of their last communications satellite, the British have added the final link to their Skynet 5 communications system.
Skynet 5 is the latest iteration of a global communications system deployed by the British Armed Forces. The final satellite in the system was launched this week, and will allow high-bandwidth telecommunications between British forces located anywhere in the world. In addition to voice communications, it will allow data transfer and the remote control of robot airplanes, one of which is called "The Reaper." One of the manufacturers was quoted by BBC News as saying: "So, computers can talk directly to computers."
Haha, we're all f***ed. And here's the real kicker -- the system is actually privately owned and the British Armed Forces are only getting a piece of the bandwidth. Wow. Run for the hills, Terminators coming! Seriously, this can't be good. And while it's not the worst news I've ever heard, it takes second only to "Honey, I'm pregnant."
Sarah Connor Has Failed -- the British Just Built Skynet [io9]
Thanks Shawn, you know how I love bad news on Fridays
Jun 13 2008 Folding Plane Perfect For Drug Smugglers
Ah yes, another plane for the drug-smuggling readers out there. The ICON A5 is actually a luxury aircraft aimed at rich people that have more money than they know what to do with and don't want to bother going through all the training required for a regular pilot's license.
"We designed it so that people who don't know airplanes know that something has changed," Kirk Hawkins, ICON's chief executive officer, told Popular Mechanics.What's changed are federal regulations, which created a new form of airplane and a new kind of pilot license that requires less training and no medical check to obtain. The Federal Aviation Administration created the Sport Pilot category in 2004, but only now are players large and small entering this virgin market.
The plane has folding wings so you can store it in a garage, and comes with its own trailer. For safety, it has a parachute that will deploy and float you back to earth safely should you do something stupid while attempting to join the mile-high club. Which, incidentally, I'm a member of. I say alone counts.
A bunch more pictures (including folded wings and cockpit), along with a boring video of the plane's unveiling party, after the jump.
Continue Reading " Folding Plane Perfect For Drug Smugglers "
Jun 13 2008 Chug 2 Beers In 2 Seconds With The Bierstick
Now I love drinking beer just as much as the next raging alcoholic whose BAC can't drop below .12 (think Speed, but with less bus and more cirrhosis), and definitely took my share of beer-bongs and shotguns in college. But a time comes in every man's life when it's time to settle down and drink beer out of a glass instead of a plastic funnel or the side of a can you've punctured with your car keys. So I'm gonna have to pass on the Bierstick. It's a device that allows the user to drink up to 24 oz of beer in less than two seconds. You just pour the beer in, push the end against a wall (or a scantily clad chick's chest -- picture after the jump!) and slam into it when you're ready to shoot beer out nose. Each stick will set you back $20 but guarantees you'll be the life of the sausage party.
And since it's Friday and you've all been good this week, a picture of two hot chicks in their bras using the thing after the jump. Also, I added a few videos of people using similar devices (which appear to be paint sticks) as evidence that it does it fact make you look like you're going to town on a monster beer-filled dong.
Continue Reading " Chug 2 Beers In 2 Seconds With The Bierstick "
Jun 13 2008 ZOMG!: Epic Mario-Themed Wedding Cake
Truthfully, we've seen some pretty stunning Mario edibles in the past, but this one might very well take the cake (I'm a stupid a-hole!). At first glance I thought this was a Super Mario Galaxy themed cake, but it's actually Mario Kart (the interplanetary scene is Rainbow Road, check the other pics for a better angle). Wow, just wow. Amazing work. I would have loved to have something like this at my wedding, but I got hitched at one of those drive-thru's in Vegas. It was a McDonald's and we had a hash brown cake with ketchup icing. What can I say, I was marrying a whore.
Hit the jump for a bunch more worthwhile closeups.
Jun 12 2008 Wow: Little Kids Firing Automatic Weapons
This video is old. Old as anything else that was filmed in 2005. But I hadn't seen it until now, and it's awesome. Awesome in a "holy shit, four-year olds are blowing up cars with automatic weapons" kind of way. Make sure you have the volume down on your speakers, it gets kind of loud. The video was taken during "Oklahoma Full Auto Shoot", an annual event in which kids with no motor skills destroy things with automatic weapons. Just watch it. I love how at 0:14 when the car starts rolling and the kids start firing at it, you understand just how dangerous a weapon is in the hands of a child. Now I'm not sure how many people typically die at this awesome annual event, but if I had to guess I'd say oh my God they're training these kids to be in a militia.
Toddlers shooting machine guns at cars [bbgadgets]
Jun 12 2008 Black Box Casemod Is Actually Bright Red
Some guy scored an old black box (flight data recorder) off eBay and, after removing the asbestos and fiberglass it was stuffed with, threw a Linux server up in that mother. I love the look, but an indestructible casemod just isn't for me. I need an acid-bath casemod that destroys itself should I not log onto my computer for 24 hours. Because otherwise:
The Geekologie Writer wasn't the brightest star in the sky, nor was he handsome by anyone's standards, but he did love his job. And, as was discovered posthumously, cartoon porn. Superficial Writer, please return to your seat. The Geekologist specifically requested no one pee in his casket.
Hit the jump for a few more shots of the mod.
Continue Reading " Black Box Casemod Is Actually Bright Red "
Jun 12 2008 Chicago Building World's 2nd Tallest Building
Chicago has started construction of the world's 2nd tallest building, the Chicago Spire, which, when completed in 2011, will stand 610 meters (2,000 feet) tall. However, the accolade will be short lived, as the 612 meter (2,009 foot) Russian Tower in Moscow is scheduled for completion in 2012. The Chicago Spire will be the world's tallest residential-only building though, and have 150 floors with 1,194 condominiums ranging in price from $750,000 to $40 million (a nice place to visit but a better place to rob). Let's see, what else? Ah yes, the spire makes one complete 360 degree turn from top to bottom and "has been labeled as a giant 'drill bit' by the public and others in the media have likened it to a 'tall twisting tree' and a 'blade of grass'". Wow, those are the worst descriptions I've ever heard. These people are either pretentious a-holes are high as hell on their own 'twisted trees' and 'blades of grass'. Seriously, it's a giant freaking dildo.
Jun 12 2008 XBox 360 Cake Looks Good Enough To Eat
It's been a little while since we've posted any sweets on Geekologie, so I figured it was about that time. This is an XBox 360 cake made by Heather Spencer, who is finishing her Associates degree in Baking and Pastry Arts, possibly at some school near Grand Blanc, Michigan (I'm working from a Myspace profile here, folks). The cake looks good. Good enough to eat -- which you really could because it's a cake! I don't have much more info, except I'd hit it. You know, my girlfriend offered to make me a custom cake for my birthday and I said I loved the idea. She told me to choose something that I really like and she'd try her best to turn it into a cake. I thought and thought but finally just told her to go with her own design, something that really exemplified me as a person. So my birthday rolls around and HELLO giant asshole cake.
Hit the jump for closeups of the controller and box, as well as a link to her Myspace gallery with a bunch more delicious cakes.
Jun 12 2008 Wrong, Just Plain Wrong: Goldfish Keychains
Vendors in Qingdao, China are selling these sealed keychains with a (temporarily) live goldfish inside. It's just plain wrong and makes me want to punch someone in their freaking head.
The fish would survive just a few hours, and would be lucky to make it from the manufacturers to the point of sale. We are shocked and appalled. It is a gimmick and shows no respect for the animals at all.
Jesus, if there's one thing I hate in the world it's animal abusers and pederasts. And whoever is behind this scheme is clearly both. Are there any Geekologie operatives functioning in Qingdao? If so, report back and we'll develop a course of action -- kick assction.
Goldfish Keyring With Live Goldfish [weirdasianews]
Thanks to Melissa and Allyson, who are as upset as I am about this.
Jun 12 2008 Robotic Dog Better Than The Real Thing For Combating Loneliness In Old Folks
Researchers at St. Louis University are using Aibo, a discontinued (maulings) robot dog from Sony to study how a robotic pet can alleviate loneliness in old folks. According to their study, a dog made out of metal and plastic is just as good as a real puppy. And possible even better since they could be fitted with sensors and shit to take a patient's pulse, blood pressure, savings account, etc. The video is a must watch, as the old people are the cutest bunch of nuts I've ever seen. I'm still skeptical about the whole robotic dog thing though. I mean, some crazy old bat brings a Big Dog home, and the next thing you know, dead old people everywhere. And then who would AOL sell their internet services to?
Robot Dog Therapy [sciencentral]
Thanks to Shawn, who knows how much I love old people and hate robots
Jun 12 2008 Anatomy Of A Gummi Bear (They Have Bones)
From the same artist that brought us the anatomy of a balloon animal comes this anatomical study of gummi bears. As you can see, there's a lot more going on inside than just delicious gummidom. They've got brains, bones, and even penises. So yeah, not eating gummi bears anymore. Say, have I ever told you about the time I bet my roommate he couldn't fit a whole package of gummis in his mouth at once? Yeah, he choked to death. Now I have the big room!
Artist's Site (hit it for a bigger picture and other cool art)
Thanks Alex and Shawn, I didn't like gnawing the heads off those gummy bastards anyways
Jun 12 2008 Unicorn Discovered, Little Girls And I Rejoice
This is a picture of a unicorn. A real, live unicorn. While technically not a corncob, a single horn protrudes from the center of the animal's head. The deer, which resides in Tuscany, Italy, has a twin with regular horns. It was born in captivity after its mother was struck by a car and unable to fend for herself in the wild.
The earliest mention of the beast was by the Greek historian Herodotus in the 5th century BC.In one notebook, Leonardo Da Vinci suggested unicorns could be captured using a virgin as bait.
Okay, so which one of you is gonna be the bait? HA! Just kidding, I'll do it :(
'Unicorn' born in Italy [telegraph]
Thanks Bryan and Ling, now let's capture that thing and offer unicorn rides at children's birthdays -- we'll be rich!
Jun 11 2008 Darwinism At Work: How Not To Shoot A Gun
If there's one thing I love in life, it's a good gun-firing blooper video. Sex-blooper videos are good too, but often remind me of my own incredible shortcomings (falling off the toilet, thinking I'm the only one home). Well this particular video is gun-only, but still awesome. I've seriously never seen so many people who shouldn't breed in a single 1:13 video before.
Thanks Jake, now lets go do something really dangerous. No, not like having sex with my ex-girlfriend. I said dangerous, not diseasey.
Jun 11 2008 Washer Works With A Single Cup Of Water
Well we've seen water conserving washing machines before, but in this age of waste, there can never be enough conceptual green washers. And now inventors at Leeds University claim to have invented a washer than can efficiently clean clothes using only (two girls) one cup of water and a bunch of plastic chips.
The process is based on the use of plastic granules (or chips) which are tumbled with the clothes to remove stains. A range of tests, carried out according to worldwide industry protocols to prove the technology performs to the high standards expected in the cleaning industry, show the process can remove virtually all types of everyday stains as effectively as existing processes whilst leaving clothes as fresh as normal washing. In addition, the clothes emerge from the process almost dry, reducing the need for tumble-driers. Xeros' technology uses as little as a cup of water in each wash cycle and could also bring benefits to other industrial processes such as wastewater treatment and metal degreasing.
Interesting. There is speculation as to whether the energy (and oil) involved in manufacturing the plastic chips necessary to wash clothes outweighs the water saved. So we'll see how that plays out. Regardless though, those stupid inventors have it all wrong. Screw using plastic chips, they need to build a washer that cleans with Doritos. Now that's a freaking washer.
Washing Machine Drinks Just One Cup of Water Per Wash [uk.gizmodo]
Thanks to Andrea, who washes clothes the old fashioned way, by buying new ones
Jun 11 2008 HP's New Monitor Rocks Out With Its Color Out, Can Produce Over A Billion Of Them
The HP DreamColor LP2480xz is a 24-inch LED backlit monitor that can display over a billion colors (~64x what a typical LCD monitor can do). Unfortunately they cost $3,499. But if you're an artist or someone who really values accurate color display, maybe it's the monitor for you. And speaking of art, I bet this thing can display the hell out of some porno. Am I right? Hells yeah. *high fives* This old CRT can't replicate a natural nipple hue to save it's tube. Nipples aside though, vagina. Bet it looks good on that thing.
Hit the jump for another questionable comparison vs. regular LCD and a couple other product shots.
Jun 11 2008 Good Freaking Job: Felt Plush Nintendo
Well we've seen plush gaming systems before, but nothing as wickedly awesome as this felt NES. Made by Craftster user blueblythe, the felt was all hand-dyed, stitched, and embroidered. It took about two weeks to complete and features an NES that can open and have cartridges inserted, a controller and zapper than can be connected, and a television with interchangeable Super Mario 3 and Duck Hunt screens. It looks almost as fun as playing the real thing, and probably a lot more comfortable to sleep on. Good job, my hat's off to you blueblythe, as are my pants. WHEE!! *swinging pants around over my head like a helicopter* Uh oh, here comes The Superficial Writer, and from the look of things he wants to join my pants-free party. Quickly, back on!
Hit the jump for a bunch more closeups of the awesomely soft system.
Jun 11 2008 Office Rampage Video That Was So Awesome Is Indeed Fake, Viral Marketing For Wanted
Remember the bad-to-the-ass office rampage video from last week? Turns out it's fake after all. And if that wasn't bad enough, it was a viral marketing video made by Russian director Timur Bekmambetov to hype his new movie, Wanted, starring Angelina Jolie and James MacAvoy. Good job Timur, you totally had me fooled. And for successfully pulling off the hoax I will now reward you by boycotting Wanted. And not just because I hate being tricked, but because you're an asshole and the movie will probably suck anyways. So Timur, you better pray The Iwatchstuff Writer says that shit is solid freaking gold, otherwise I'm picketing the hell out of the local theater.
Cubicle Farm Rampage Video Was Just A Viral Marketing Stunt [gizmodo]
Jun 11 2008 Baby Born With Extra Thingie On Its Back
I've been contemplating whether or not to post this since last night, but since so many people sent it in, and I'm a sucker for peer pressure (I do drugs now), I guess I am. Of course, the story was broken by The Sun, so it's probably faker than the license I use to buy beer with (I'm only 17) anyways. Allegedly a son born to Li Jun, a 30-year old farmer from Hejian City in China's Henan province, was born with an extra penis on his back. I had a kid on my swim team growing up with an extra nipple on his back, but never have I heard of a spare penis. The appendage is the result of a condition known as fetus in fetu, in which one twin is partially reabsorbed by the other. Thankfully, the baby underwent surgery to remove the unit (which was attached to the spine) and the baby has made a full recovery and will live a normal, one penis life.
Seriously, Geekologie is thankful the surgery was a success, the baby is healthy and doing well, and wonders if doctors could attach that thing to me somewhere. Anywhere, I don't care. Forehead's fine.
Uncensored picture of the thing after the jump. WARNING: It's a baby with a penis on it's back.
Continue Reading " Baby Born With Extra Thingie On Its Back "
Jun 11 2008 Romanian Fighter Jet Gets Hit By UFOs, Aliens Arrested For Flying Under The Influence
On October 31st, 2007 a Romanian Mig 21 Lancer was struck by not one but four UFOs and the government has now released footage of said incident. As can be unclearly seen in the untranslated video at 0:49 and 1:16, the aliens were flying what appear to be the black smoke from Lost when they hit the plane. Afterwards, the pilot was able to land the aircraft without incident.
Lt. Col. Nicolae Grigorie said a video recorded by cameras onboard the plane depicts "two solid bodies, which are not translucid." Grigorie said authorities are working to determine what the objects could have been. "They couldn't be birds because there are no birds in Europe able to fly so high. And they couldn't be ice bodies because it was a clear sky -- neither could they be pieces of another plane or a meteor," he said.He said the government has ruled out rocket launches and ground artillery fires as causes of the incident.
When asked what he thought the objects were, Grigorie exclaimed, "F***ing aliens, yo! Tape your buttcheeks together before bed, the wonk eyed bastards are coming!"
UFOs hit Romanian plane [upi]
Thanks Mikal, I'm now officially adding aliens to my apocalyptic fears
Jun 11 2008 BMW Makes Morphable, Fabric-Covered Car
Yesterday BMW unveiled their GINA Visionary Model, a fabric-covered vehicle that can change shapes with the push of a button.
Chris Bangle (head of design at BMW) and his team actually built GINA -- which stands for "Geometry and functions In 'N' Adaptions" -- six years ago, but BMW kept it under, er, wraps until Tuesday. It's built on the Z8 chassis and has a 4.4-liter V8 and six-speed automatic transmission. BMW says the fabric skin - polyurethane-coated Lycra - is resilient, durable and water resistant. It's stretched over an aluminum frame controlled by electric and hydraulic actuators that allow the owner to change the body shape. Want a big spoiler on the back? Wider fenders? No problem. "The drastic reinterpretation of familiar functionality and structure means that drivers have a completely new experience when they handle their car," BMW says.
Neat idea BMW, but what's up with the gaudy silver skin? You put all that effort into building a morphable, fabric-covered car and don't even use denim? You got no class.
A TON more MUST SEE pictures and a video, along with links to much longer articles, after the jump.
Continue Reading " BMW Makes Morphable, Fabric-Covered Car "
Jun 10 2008 $100 Million Supercomputer Breaks Petaflop Barrier, Supposed To Keep U.S. Nuclear Weapon Stockpiles Safe And Reliable, Eek!
The $100 Million Roadrunner supercomputer was designed and built by IBM for the Department of Energy's National Nuclear Security Administration and is housed at the Los Alamos National Laboratory in New Mexico. It was named Roadrunner before that's New Mexico's state bird and because they're fast. Also, Wile E. Coyote is a dipshit.
The Roadrunner is a hybrid machine, the world's first, that uses both traditional computer chips and the Cell Broadband Engine which was designed for the PS3. It occupies 6,000 square feet, weighs 500,000 lbs and delivers world-leading efficiency - 376 million calculations per watt. Roadrunner will be used primarily to ensure the safety and reliability of the U.S. nuclear weapons stockpile (we're all gonna die!). It will also do research into astronomy, energy, human genome science and climate change.
It was the first to perform at a petaflop (one thousand trillion calculations per second), and would make a great secondary computer if I had room for it. Some interesting info from the press release:
In total, Roadrunner connects 6,948 dual-core AMD Opteron® chips (on IBM Model LS21 blade servers) as well as 12,960 Cell engines (on IBM Model QS22 blade servers). The Roadrunner system has 80 terabytes of memory, and is housed in 288 refrigerator-sized, IBM BladeCenter® racks occupying 6,000 square feet. Its 10,000 connections - both Infiniband and Gigabit Ethernet -- require 57 miles of fiber optic cable. Roadrunner weighs 500,000 lbs. Companies that contributed components and technology include; Emcore, Flextronics, Mellanox and Voltaire.
Well that's sweet and all, but the real question is this: Can it handle me watching four or five pornos, playing Crysis, and downloading some movies illegally all at the same time? Hah -- really? Well how about all those things AND writing a nasty email to an ex-girlfirend? Got you there you stupid Roadrunner! WILE E. COYOTE FOR THE -- goddammit.
A video about the computer after the jump, along with links to very in-depth and wordy articles about it.
Jun 10 2008 German Waterslide Does A Loopty-Loop
This is a video of a new waterslide in Germany that does a loopty loop. It's not straight up and down or anything, but it's still pretty damn impressive. The ride starts with you standing in a little chamber and then getting dropped through the trap-door floor. It looks like a lot of fun. As long as shitting your banana hammock on a German water slide is your idea of fun.
Another, longer video showing how the thing was made, after the drop.
Jun 10 2008 Hood Airbags To Help Save Pedestrians?
Let's face it, getting hit by a car sucks unless the person driving is filthy rich and you don't get hurt but can fake a good neck or back injury. Well now Toyoda Gosei has begun the testing of hood and grill airbags to help protect people on foot. They're activated via some combination of camera and radar sensors and may or may not launch pedestrians even further than you would have been without them. Whether they make it to actual production awaits to be seen, but if you're regularly running over people I recommend rigging a mattress to your hood during the interim. Or you could, I don't know, STOP DRIVING ON THE FREAKING SIDEWALK.
One more picture of the car after the jump.
Jun 10 2008 "Pet Boys" Gaining Popularity In Korea
Pet boys are real guys that put themselves up for "adoption" by South Korean women. It's basically for chicks that want a boyfriend that they can shit on all the time.
Pet Boys, who are often college kids in their 20's, find "Being someone's pet is stress free job with no financial burden at all."The idea came from a Japanese anime story that was popular about 5 years ago. It was about a business woman who always had bad luck in relationships. One day, she decided to take home a young man off the street to live with her as her pet.
Huh? Apparently Pet Boy services are popping up around Korea, and recently a TV show had over 2,200 applicants after advertising Pet Boy positions. This makes no sense whatsoever. All I can gather is that the chicks want a boyfriend they can lock in the closet and treat however they want, and the guys all hope to eventually get some. Ha, good luck guys -- too bad there's a universal taboo against having sex with pets.
Would you Adopt a "Pet Boy"? [weirdasianews]
Thanks Shawn and Rya, now where do I sign myself up for adoption?
Jun 10 2008 Good Job: 14-Year Old Makes His Own Cars
Naman Chopra is a 14-year old boy in India who makes his own freaking cars. He's built two so far, a little red sports car and the limo seen there in the picture.
The black beauty is also made from junk and is capable of speeds of up to 130MPH. It has a 1498 cc engine borrowed from Daewoo Cielo. This car is equipped with power windows, power steering, manual 5 speed transmission, sun and moon roof, central locking, tubeless tires, 15" alloy wheels, clear headlamps, driver and rear passenger separation (just like in a real limousine), runs on gasoline, stereo, leather seats. Both cars are in perfect running condition.
Good looking, Naman -- very impressive work. You've definitely got a bright future in the automotive industry if you keep this up. I seriously can't believe the ingenuity of today's youth. They're making all sorts of incredible things. It's amazing. The only thing I was making at that age was out with Peder Lou. Oh, you thought I was joking about that last post didn't you? Well I wasn't. I've got enough emotional baggage to fill the all too familiar back of a 1991 Ford Econoline.
Hit the jump for more pictures (including the other vehicle), and a link to the more in-depth article.
Continue Reading " Good Job: 14-Year Old Makes His Own Cars "
Jun 10 2008 Security Robot Protects South Korean Children From "Free Candy" Scams
We've seen Japanese robot babysitters, but now South Korea is ramping it up a notch with an actual robotic security guard for children. The $100,000 robot, dubbed OFRO, has been placed in Seoul middle schools and alerts officials to suspicious behavior.
According to the developers the robot could be useful in alerting staff in case outsiders intend to seduce students. Chief Executive of Du Robo, Kang Jung-Won, told Korea Times that one of the possible scenarios is that in case OFRO spots someone trying to seduce a student it will immediately alert school's officials.After the robot has alerted teachers, they have several opportunities: whether to warn the offender via loudspeaker or send school's security guards.
OFRO has a top speed of about 3 miles/hour which is slow as shit and can be programmed to walk a regular route or controlled manually. Now where the hell were these things when I was a kid? We had all kind of damned creeps hanging around the middle school. Seriously, Peder Lou's Free Candy Van was like a second home growing up.
South Korea Hires Robot to Protect Children [weirdasianews]
Thanks MIKAL, now lets go blow up some white vans
Jun 10 2008 Disney Tours Now Available On Google Earth
We've all known for some time how useful Google Maps can be to spot drug deals in progress, but now Google, in their unending quest for interweb supremacy, is offering Disney tours through Google Earth.
Visitors can walk or fly around the park as they wish. Information on the park's 1,500 attractions pops up on the side of the screen, along with photos, videos and booking details. Even the park's numerous statues, benches, lamp posts and banners are included.It currently only features the outside of buildings, but there are plans for an update that will allow virtual visitors to enter the attractions and hotel rooms.
"HEY KIDS, WHO WANTS TO GO TO DISNEYWORLD!?!? Okay, now gather around the monitor..."
Disney World 3D tours on Google Earth [telegraph]
Thanks Steve, now my kids hate me
Jun 10 2008 Videos: Popping Popcorn With Cell Phones
This is a video of people popping a few kernels of popcorn using nothing but cell phones. A ton of similar videos have appeared on Youtube recently (more posted after the jump). Needless to say, they're fake. It's just a variation of the "cook an egg with a cellphone" hoax that went around a few years ago. And as awesome as it would be to save $8 by sneaking in and popping your own popcorn in the movie theater, it ain't gonna happen. If cell phones had to power to actually pop corn, my girlfriend's head would have exploded years ago.
Hit the jump for several more of the FAKE! videos.
Continue Reading " Videos: Popping Popcorn With Cell Phones "
Jun 9 2008 The 3G iPhone Is Here, Fanboys Rejoice And Start Waiting Outside Apple Stores, I Get Drunk And Try To Forget About Life Like Any Other Day
Well folks, after months of rumors and speculation, Apple officially announced the new 3G iPhone today at the Apple Worldwide Developers Conference. It has exactly everything everyone thought it would. Well, except when I thought it was going to be a 3D iPhone. Because it doesn't have that. Everything else though, like 3G speed and GPS. The only real news is the price -- $199 for an 8GB, $299 for 16GB. And as an added bonus, the 16 is also available in white. Oh happy day! They'll all be available starting July 11th, so I'm headed up to the closest Apple store to start my month-long camp out. And by "start my month-long camp out" I mean I'll plow my car into the front of the line right before the store opens so I can be first. And by "plow my car into the front of the line right before the store opens" I mean continue lying on the couch. And by "continue lying on the couch" I quite literally mean I'm just gonna keep lying here.
Jun 9 2008 Putter Pisser: Relieve Yourself Discreetly
I always thought when you were out on the links and had to pee you yelled 'Fore!' and pissed in a bunker or on a tree. Well apparently that's not kosher and you need a UroClub (Putter Pisser sounds better) urine collection device. I'm not so sure what's so discreet about pissing down the shaft of a fake golf club, but whatever.
Just place an inconspicuous towel over your junk, unscrew the cap of the club disguised to look like a 7-iron, and whiz away--up to half a liter. When you're done, stick the leak-proof club back in your bag and take your next shot.
The questionable device costs $50 and doesn't hold enough if you've been following the rules of golf and drinking the whole game. And that's why I'll be sticking to the sand traps. They typically provide good cover, and you can even drop some kids off at the beach if you have to. But remember: if you do, stay classy and cover them up like a cat does.
UroClub Lets Golfers Go Pee-Pee in Public [gizmodo]
Thanks Chris, and remind me to never shake your hand
Jun 9 2008 Build An Arc Reactor And Be Just Like Iron Man, Minus Everything Cool About Iron Man
Some guy made a pretty reasonable Instructable about how to build your own arc reactor like Iron Man. You have to do some polymorph plastic molding and solder some LEDs though, so you may want to hire some child labor (my kids work cheap) to ensure you don't injure yourself in the process. Once its finished you just throw that sucker under a shirt and you're off to looking good. Well, as long as you're not pasty as hell and sporting a gray undershirt. Oh, it looks good on you though.
Instructable
via
Make Your Own Iron Man Arc Reactor [ohgizmo]
Jun 9 2008 Uh-Oh: Robot Achieves Self-Replication
Self-replication is the third sign of an imminent robot takeover according to The Book Of The Robot Apocalypse, a novella I just wrote and which only contains that sentence. Well RepRap is a 3-D printer that is capable of replicating itself. Sort of.
Technophobes needn't run for the hills just yet. The replicating rapid-prototyper, or "RepRap", can only reproduce its plastic parts, not its metal or electronic components. And assembling it is an afternoon's work for a human being, says Adrian Bowyer, the University of Bath mechanical engineer who launched the RepRap project in 2004.
Okay, I didn't read all that but I did catch something about running for the hills, which I'm totally doing after this post. I suggest you come with me or get started on a robot-proof bunker of you own. But under no circumstances should you try banging your vacuum to produce a robot-fighting cyborg. I know it sounds like a solid plan, but trust me, it isn't. And if you're not going to heed my warning and must try anyways, at least listen to this: when you do get stuck (and you will), cut off as much of the hose as you safely can before going to the hospital. A foot of vacuum hose you can hide, but you show up trailing an entire shop-vac between your legs and the hospital staff will suspect something. Like that you're a pervert and your penis is stuck in the vacuum.
Dawn of the self replicating-machine [newscientisttech]
and
The Official RepRap Blog
Thanks to Byard and Eric, who both know that the only good self-replicating robot is a dead self-replicating robot
Jun 9 2008 Lightning Guns To Help Fight The War On Terrorism, Old People With Pacemakers
A company called Applied Energetics is developing lightning guns capable of stalling cars and shorting IEDs from a safe distance. They were originally planning on using them on people, but have since moved to cars and bombs after an unsuccessful attempt at rounding up test subjects (bums). The weapon is expected to be ready within 5-6 years and I'll definitely be adding one to my anti-robot arsenal. You hear that, Zeus? I said I won't be needing your lightning bolt services after all. Your rates were ridiculous anyways you greedy bastard. Oh, and while I'm at it -- I banged your wife/sister Hera! Two birds with one stone, baby! Chalk it up.
Lightning Guns to Short Out Cars, Fry Roadside Bombs [gizmodo]
Thanks Sev, don't lightning me bro!
Jun 9 2008 UPDATE: Eagle Gets Bionic Beak Story
Remember the bald eagle whose beak was shot off by some asshole poacher? Well she's finally rocking a bionic replacement, albeit temporary. "The new beak is only a temporary fix, designed to nail down precise measurements." That's a real picture of it there. Beauty (the eagle) needed the fake beak in order to grasp food and not require hand-feeding.
"She's got a grill," joked Nate Calvin, the Boise engineer who spent 200 hours designing the complex beak.
HAHAHAHA! A grill! A bird with a grill, that's priceless. *wipes tear* God, you should do standup.
Seriously though Nate, my hat's off to you and everyone else volunteering their time and expertise. You've all done a great job and made me hate people a little less.
Eagle wounded by poacher gets new beak [msnbc]
Thanks for keeping me up to date Matt, now lets go find that poacher
Jun 9 2008 Emoticon Mask Hides Your True Emotions
The Mask Of Emotion was developed by the Digital Media Design Department at Hongik University in Korea and should have been included in Majora's Mask. The bulbous headgear hides true emotions and instead shows one of seven emoticons chosen by the wearer. It also makes crossing busy intersections infinitely more dangerous. I suggest my girlfriend wear one in the bedroom when we're getting intimate. Partly because she's so painful to look at, but mostly because I have no idea what the hell I'm doing. Seriously, I can count the number of times I've been with a woman on two hands.*
*Minus one hand, three and a half fingers.
Emoticon mask will make you smile [make]
Thanks to Kari, who wears her emotions on her sleeve
Jun 9 2008 Eye Candy/Poison: Wicked Gaming Tattoos
First off, I'll kick my current girlfriend to the curb and marry you if that's you in the picture (the chick with the ink, not one of the dudes). I mean that. The only way to the Geekologie Writer's heart is a permanent reminder that you love the Zelda series as much as I do. So ladies, if you're looking to get into these Umbros (I'm wearing them as boxers), now you know how. Just fire off an email with a picture of your Zelda-themed tattoo attached and we'll get our elope on. Then we'll honeymoon in Hyrule. I know people. Like a Goron that'll sell us some bombs. Seriously, what better way to profess our undying love for each other than blowing some shit up and stealing rupees from the townspeople? Now I know what you're thinking, and yes, that was the most romantic thing ever written.
More MUST SEE gaming tattoos after the jump, including several Marios, another Zelda, a Pac-Man on someone's ass (don't worry, I censored the crack) and the epicest of epic Star Wars tattoo just for the hell of it (why is guy's face blurred? I'd be proud as hell). Also a link to the 40+ picture gallery thats also worth checking out.
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