A "Cannibal Banquet" is gross and involves eating a sort of fake human. Here's how the Cannibal Banquet works... a pinata-like "body" is carefully crafted, then stuffed with edible goodies in a red sauce. More "sauce" is somehow embedded into the outside covering - "skin" as it were - of the body so that it will appear to bleed when cut into. What.The.F***? And... | More →

Derrie-Air is an airline that believes the less you and your baggage weighs, the less you should pays. It's fake and part of an ad campaign run by a Philadelphia newspaper to f*** with fat people. Philadelphia Media Holdings spokesman Jay Devine said the goal is to "demonstrate the power of our brands in generating awareness and generating traffic for our advertisers, and put... | More →

Remember the B-2 Bomber that crashed in February? Well the government has finally released footage of the $1.2 billion disaster after verifying there were no aliens, terrorists, zombies, polygamists, or rogue robots involved. It's pretty sad to watch, especially since the camera operator has the motor skills of a newborn. The first half of the video is another B-2 taking off, so skip through... | More →

Here are a bunch of classic video game scenes rendered in LEGO. As you can see, that's Duck Hunt there, and there's some Mortal Kombat, Contra, Castlevania, and Excitebike after the jump. I must say, they're all very well done and beautiful to look at. Not as beautiful as a naked chick mind you, but what is? Exactly, nothing. Even a naked chick with... | More →

I'm not sure if this is even real or not, but I sure hope it is because I'm getting pretty damn tired of the reading material options in the office bathroom (a couple Highlights and an empty cereal box). The RSStroom Reader allegedly prints out your favorite RSS feeds on toilet paper so you can catch up on Geekologie without bringing your laptop to... | More →

First, there were the Star Wars raps, and now, Star Trek. This is song called The U.S.S. Enterprise (is getting *insert slang term for a woman's nether-region here* tonight) by some group called Those Aren't Muskets. It's very NSFW because it's all about doing it and they say a bunch of dirty words. I didn't like it at first, but it got okay towards... | More →

Sobrietol is some mystery formula of cancer-causing agents that reduces your blood alcohol content after a heavy night of drinking. And let me tell you -- as someone who thought yesterday was Friday and went out and got shit-hammered -- I lost my shoes. Have you ever had one too many drinks at a party, wine-tasting, or night out with the girls? Unfortunately, for... | More →

Youvebeenleftbehind.com is an online service that will send emails (assuming computers still work) to as many as 62 nonbelieving friends/family after you, the good Christian, have been conveniently relocated to heaven during the "Rapture". We have set up a system to send documents by email, to the addresses you provide, 6 days after the "Rapture" of the Church. This occurs when 3 of our... | More →

Are you a lazy bastard or a shop teacher that's had ten accidents? If so, this self stirring mug may be for you. The mugs are made by Gevalia, a company best known for convincing me to sign up for their coffee of the month club through the use of a well placed late-night infomercial featuring a sexy saleswoman with a sultry voice. Anyway,... | More →

Boeing recently tested their new 25 kilowatt solid-state laser, which is a step in the direction of a future 100 kW (keep in mind the Death Star was only packing something like 80 kW*) ray that will blow up the whole world and possibly Mars and Venus (which, honestly, is a shitty planet that we're better off without). The thin-disk laser is an initiative... | More →

Using 448 LEDs and a controller unit, this guy modded his Roomba into Pacmba, the Pac-Man Vacuum. It's fairly awesome, but nowhere near as awesome as the Donkba, my Donkey Kong Roomba. Say, who ate the last of my bananas? F***ing Donkba! I swear I'm gonna kick -- whoa now, put the barrel down. roomba pac-man [hackaday] Thanks Shawn, Andy, and BK, now you... | More →

Well folks, it's been awhile since I've showered or posted any custom shoes, so I guess now is as good a time as any to release the hounds with another set of custom footwear. The Optimus Prime ones there are admittedly awesome as hell and I'd totally give my left nut (well, only nut) to have them. Unfortunately they're selling for about $600 and... | More →

As a man who frequently blogs and eats his lunch on the john, I know all about the benefits of canning your food (!). And now there's a restaurant in Taiwan that is cashing in on what I've known for years -- eating on the throne is the shit (!). Patrons sit on toilets for seats and eat food off covered sinks and bathtubs.... | More →

This is a 17-year old clip from Mystery Science Theater 3,000 in which Crow and Tom Servo debate PCs vs. Macs (similar to those new commercials). Seems like not much has changed since '91. I believe they said it best when they sang: Gamera is really neat, Gamera is filled with meat, We've been eating Gameraaaaa! Shells, teeth, eyes, flames, claws, breath, scales, fun!... | More →

The $30 Magnetic Accelerator from Thinkgeek uses black magic to launch ball bearings at your roommate when he refuses to fetch you a beer from the fridge even though he's closer. The kit can be assembled in just a few minutes and requires no glue (so there's little chance of bonding your hand to your genitals again). "Set the metal ball at the end... | More →

This interactive Pong Table was constructed by German designer Moritz Waldemeyer for MOMA's recent Design and the Elastic Mind exhibit. The table uses 2,400 LEDs, two track pads, and the souls of old Atari execs to immerse players in an updated, and much more interactive Pong experience. Still reminds me of air hockey though. And speaking of which, I lost a tournament at the... | More →

When you send an anonymous email to The Superficial Writer with a subject line promising nude photos of Hayden Panettiere when it's actually packed with snapshots of your nuts. UPDATE: Another video of the second half of the action from a worker's cellphone camera added after the jump (thanks Sunyeti and Rachel).... | More →

This is the Handwrench by designer Paul Julius Martus. It's a hand wrench, with a little hand on the end. BWAHAH HA HA HA! Some people, so clever. I'm pretty sure it's just an art piece though, seeing how your little fingers would probably break off if you were trying to bust a real serious nut loose. Still, Paul gets clever points for being... | More →

The $22 DANGERBOMB CLOCK looks like a bomb and shouldn't be taken on flights. It's the next generation in wake up equipment that requires you to do something besides slap a button to actually turn the damn thing off. How does it work? Per the translated Amazon Japan page: Product specifications: Do not happen in the explosion and quickly ugh? KACHI KACHI KACHI... wake-up... | More →

This is a LEGO Johnny Five. As you may recall, he's the robot from such films as Short Circuit and Short Circuit 2. Brothers Brick user rack911 made him, and I've got to admit he's looking pretty damn good. Small, but good. Especially the eyes. They remind me of an ex-girlfriend's. Blue and piercing. That chick could burn a damn hole through your skull... | More →

In public transportation news, police in Bucharest, Romania are looking for some chick that performs pole dances on the city's subway between stations and then uses AN EMPTY KFC BUCKET to ask for donations. That's actually her in the picture (that looks like it was taken with a pinhole-cameraphone through a paper bag). Passengers described the dancer, photographed by a passenger's mobile phone, as... | More →

NASA, who should be focusing their efforts on a way to blast me out of the solar system, is instead making movies with visible magnetic fields. Not sure how this is gonna help me bed an alien chick, but whatever, it's freaking awesome so I'll let it slide. Scientists from NASA's Space Sciences Laboratory have made (magnetic fields) visible as "animated photographs," using sound-controlled... | More →

What's cooler than a beaver casemod? Well, not this microwave casemod, but it's pretty damn close. Check out the desktop background -- it looks like they're cooking microwavable lasagna! LOL! ROTFL! Listen, I promise to kidney punch myself as hard as I can for typing that. *UMPH* Oh man that was a good one, I'm gonna need to change boxers. Microwave PC won't heat... | More →

In case you couldn't tell or are having your mommy read this aloud while you eat a bowl of breakfast cereal, these are some prostitutey shoes with embedded Gameboys. I assume they're either 1. for gaming hookers that don't carry purses, or 2. for those who service johns that think their penises are just nonfunctional joysticks and only frequent prossies to cry about how... | More →

And I thought the shed I grew up in had poor living conditions. This just goes to show that you should never take anything for granted. This poor bastard is clearly locked in a basement, lives entirely on canned Coke and pot pies, pees in empty one-gallon water jugs, shits in an oversized litter box, thinks he looked handsome in his senior yearbook photo,... | More →

Want to know the probable ending to Terminator: Salvation long before its release? Want to be horribly disappointed in something beyond your control? Then look under the cut! Continue Reading "'Terminator: Salvation' Ending Revealed to be Stupid" | More →

Paul Granjon is the sadistic bastard responsible for teaching these robots how to procreate. They were programmed with five modes and act differently in each. The different modes follow: Normal: the robots roam around and run into walls Sing: the robots continue to putt around and run into walls, but beep occasionally In Heat: the robots try to find each other so they can... | More →

Use this thing, the Suzukaze Air-Conditioned Seat Cushion. It keeps your rear cool, funk free, and is allegedly eco-friendly. Using the sweat generated by your bum and a tiny bit of energy, this cushion has an internal fan that blows over 170 liters of air per minute to keep your nether-region cool. It is light weight, portable, and so efficient that even if used... | More →

Listen up guys: it turns out driving an eco-friendly car may increase your chances of getting to touch a woman. According to a study conducted by GM as part of this year's Challenge X competition: * Nearly 9 in 10 women (88 percent) say they'd rather chat up someone who owns the latest fuel-efficient car versus the latest sports car. * Eighty percent of... | More →

We've already seen all sorts of ridiculous computer desks here at Geekologie, and here comes another -- the V1 (V for Vision, not Vagina). It looks like the bastard child of a three-way between a car seat, computer desk, and drum set. The V1 computer desk is dynamically designed to be the best computer desk system on Earth. Comfort, quality, and customer satisfaction are... | More →

If there is one thing I hate at a birthday party it's a creepy-ass clown. A close second are magicians. But after magicians come balloon animal makers. And not just because the one I hired for my college graduation party got drunk and swung his little balloon covered unit around like a helicopter in front of my entire family, but that's part of it.... | More →

These are Jesus Inspirational Sports Statues for kids. They cost $25 apiece and I just ordered the whole set. Handpainted resin statues on a solid wood base are the perfect gift for every young Catholic athlete. These statues portray Jesus actively participating with boys and girls in a variety of sports. A wonderful way to reinforce Jesus "as friend" in everyday activities. Sizes vary... | More →

Fredric J. Baur was responsible for designing the Pringles potato crisp packaging system commonly referred to by non-jargonists as the Pringles can. But alas, Baur's expiration date passed in May and he requested his family bury a portion of his ashes in one of the cans he was so proud of. He was 89. Still no word if he specifically asked for a Sour... | More →

Drivemocions are animated LED emoticons for your car. You just stick the suction cup to your back window, and presto -- you become a dangerous hazard and reason enough for me to road rage on that ass like a tank. The faces are controlled via wireless controller, so you can pay even less attention to the road and more attention making sure you picked... | More →

Brad Jayakody, 30 (that's him in the picture), was almost arrested for attempting to board a flight from London to Dusseldorf, Germany while wearing that Transformers t-shirt. Mr Jayakody said the first guard started joking with him about the Transformers character depicted on his French Connection T-shirt. "Then he explains that since Megatron is holding a gun, I'm not allowed to fly,' he said.... | More →

The AOS Cassette Face Watch costs about $70 and looks like a cassette. It also tells time. No way. Yes way. No way! Yes way! But who needs to tell time anyways? Time is old fashioned and not the sun. I suggest we get rid of time altogether and any hot and spicy female readers send me provocative pictures. Because then, I'm a scientist,... | More →

Here are some geek gang signs that some nerds came up with when they were working on a secret handshake. As you can see, they're pretty questionable. But not nearly as questionable as the leftover red beans and rice I just had for lunch. Half the beans jumped out of the bowl and tried to stab me with my own fork while the rice... | More →

The Omni Chair is the lovechild of a pillow who was in love with a beanbag chair but whose families were quarreling (think Romeo and Juliet, but way comfier to sit on). Well one fateful night the pillow threw itself off the bed and snuck out to have relations with the beanbag chair in my parent's basement. Two months later *BLAM* the Omni chair.... | More →

Scientists in Japan recently made the world's smallest ramen bowl, with a diameter of only 1/25,000 of an inch. Which, in scientific terminology, makes it invisible except to superheros that got shafted in the cool powers department (unless they can also see through walls, in which case boobs, sweet). The bowl was carved entirely out of nanotubes and was entered in a recent microphotography... | More →

Sometimes there's a candle that comes along and changes the way I look at wax-fueled flames forever. And this is one -- The Hotwicks Stripper Candle. The $9 candle smells like strippers. It's a candle and an alibi all in one! You don't smell like a stripper, you just smell like a candle. This is our favorite candle. After hundreds of hours of research... | More →

From the "Just Because You Can Probably Means You Shouldn't" Department comes this massive keyboard. It's just short of ten million feet long and doesn't have a QWERTY layout. Nope, the letters are in alphabetical order, and there aren't any keys besides the letters. So yeah, no ENTER, space, or anything else. It's still awesome though. Couple this sucker with a couch-sized mouse and... | More →