May 28 2008Baaad Idea: Robot With Supergun Attached
iRobot, best known for selling Roombas (the vacuuming robots) and Loojes, (the ass-cleaning robots) has partnered with Metal Storm (the purveyor of 1,000,000 round/minute superguns) to create a robot that just made me destroy the back of my pants. The 250 pound vehicle is allegedly going to be used for non-lethal purposes, but we'll see what happens when the thing goes rogue.
Metal Storm's 40mm weapons mount can deliver both high-explosive and less-lethal rounds. Which makes it perfect for everything from urban assaults to "border patrol" to "infrastructure protection" to "crowd control."
Okay, so I take it infrastructure protection isn't getting your house's foundation sprayed for termites. I swear, you learn something new every day. Like today I learned if my wife's dog gets really excited when a stranger comes to the door she's likely to shit on the floor. Knowledge: it's not just in books, sometimes you step in it.
Robot + Supergun = 'Crowd Control' [wired]
Thanks Kyle, so how exactly do we destroy these things?
Reader Comments
1. Blak.Majek - May 28, 2008 5:53 PM
Dear sweet Jesus! the only problem with the forthcoming Robot Apocalypse is that I have to get rid of all my Zombie Killing gear and start investing in Robot Dismantaling gear.... oh the humanity!!!
2. Elmo - May 28, 2008 7:11 PM
Holy Sh*t
do you believe that? Of all things! Someone's gonna die.....
Just look! They stole the name I-robot!!!
we're all doomed
3. Jason - May 28, 2008 7:27 PM
Kyle? Pshh.
4. rike - May 28, 2008 11:17 PM
Holy F*ck, it's Metal Gear Solid!
5. Cyberwulf - May 29, 2008 2:29 AM
son of a BITCH! How the hell do you protect yourself from that??
6. poster - May 29, 2008 3:36 AM
Simple, just get the roomba hacking tools and use it on that. >:3
7. 543sg - May 29, 2008 4:21 AM
we ve got make it say its name backwards 3 times!!! TOBORI TOBORI TOBORI!!!
whad do u mean it has no mouth?? WE ARE F*CKED
8. 25 - May 29, 2008 5:40 AM
sneak up from behind and kick it over onto its side.
9. boredom - May 29, 2008 8:28 AM
@8 thats a good idea and all but it is one heavy SOB and kicking it over would take a LOT of effort, you'd have to do more of a cow tipping style charge on it to get it on it's side. Also this I believe is one of the ones that in most situations right itself
10. Pete - May 29, 2008 8:52 AM
I love that clicking the 'We're all gonna die!' tag brings up like a brazillion reasons to help relieve my constipation.
11. v - May 29, 2008 9:18 AM
@Elmo: I, Robot was published in 1950. The company, iRobot, was founded in 1990. They don't say how they got their name, but I suppose it was taken from the novel, just because it's a similar line of products (cybernetics) and because the robots in I, Robot were actually created as helpful and positive (in the book, at least).
In theory, to destroy one, you'd have to aim for the weak points, which I suppose would be the treads and the gun's stand/whatever.
Also, iRobot has made military weaponry in the past. Don't think that any of the companies that make little machines that clean your house are as cute as their products. Most of them either already have military weapons completed or in the works, or they're thinking of it. Plus, all of the artillery is funded by the government.
12. v - May 29, 2008 9:22 AM
Also, I then read 25's comment and lol'd.
@#8: "...The 250 pound vehicle..."
...I'd like to see you try to kick it over on its side. And then you'd get shot.
Plus, you'd have to have enough force to even tilt it, and remember, physics says that equal and opposite reactions is correct, so... If you can kick 250 lbs worth of force... But you still have to get past the line of about 20 others and with a chance of getting shot... Yeah, you get the point.
13. v - May 29, 2008 9:30 AM
... And man, I keep going back and reading over the comments, so here's the last one on here from me..
@rike: Metal geeeaaaar. (The "Solid" part of the title comes from Solid Snake, doesn't it? asdf)
14. bedot - May 29, 2008 11:29 AM
damn. I had a really witty robot joke but v's overwhelming nerdiness drained me of it.
At least it's clear what the "v" stands for. (Hint: it rhymes with schmurgin)
15. Popadopolis - May 31, 2008 6:58 PM
I still have my company name untouched: Me, Robot. My company makes robots too. Except they don't vaccuum or kill people. They're more geared towards unclogging toilets. They also don't need electricity to work. The science behind them is mind-boggling, but all you need to know is that it's made out of a broken plunger sitting on the floor and my wet stinky arm.
My shower's broken too...