Umm, Sure: Animal Head Bicycle Seat Covers
These are bicycle seat covers for all you pervs out there with a "sitting on animal heads" fetish. You're my kind of people, high five! Okay, now police, round up anyone who just tried to give me a high five. Whew, now that the freaky deviants are out of here, let's get down to business. These bike seat covers come in goat, bear, and dog varieties and all cost about $15. If you want to get the most bang for your buck though I recommend the dog or goat ones, since they're made of way more material than the bear. I considered one, but I'm holding out for a crocodile. Have you ever sat on a crocodile's head before? Let me tell you -- it's a rush. Like huffing airplane glue, but with more sharp teeth inches from your manhammer.
Thanks to Melissa, who doesn't need a bike because she rides a unicorn, for the tip
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First of all, what in the hell is a 'toilet paper researcher', and how do I become one? Secondly, this is ridiculous. I've been wiping with the comics for years, and let me tell you -- you could probably read Garfield on my buttcheeks. Yes, there is such a thing as a toile... / Continue →
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This is a pair of deer antler bicycle handlebars designed by Taylor Simpson. Granted there's no brake attachment, but let's not kid ourselves, if you've got a pair of deer antler bicycle handlebars you're a hipster and riding a fixie anyways. That said, I just switched out my... / Continue →
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The Comfort Wipe is an 18" arm extender/wad of toilet paper holder for use when you can't reach your own ass or don't like your digits coming into contact with your butthole (you're doing it wrong!). Interesting. Also, I want to know the "advantages" of being big the hefty du... / Continue →
