Apr 8 2008Protect Ya Neck With A Bulletproof Hoodie
The Defender Hoodie is bulletproof (and questionably stabproof and taseproof). It comes packed with "2mm of Type IIA bulletproofing, enough to stop a 9mm full-metal-jacket round at a velocity of 1,090 feet-per-second." Unfortunately it costs $600 and doesn't have any bulletproofing in the hood. So you better hope whoever has beef doesn't have any aim. And now, a word from the Wu-Tang Clan.
I see em duckin my dart gun, bustin, from every angleWorldwide total carnage, the sickest flow
that be code named Agent Orange, killin you slow
It's only right you pay homage
to those that's bout to blow like that shit up your nose, solid
as a rock when I strike target, ver-bal
Be screamin on you like a drill sargeant, her-bals
got me where I wanna be right now, don't know the time
Check the hour on your sundial, watch me shine
Drunk off of cheap wine
Each line be on point when I speak mine
On behalf of my crew, SUUUUUUUUUUU, Enter the Wu
Oh man, I love that part about being drunk off of cheap wine. I've been known to do that. Seriously though, I think we can all agree gun safety is the real issue here.
Reader Comments
1. Dan - April 8, 2008 5:26 PM
NO BULLETPROOFING N THE HOOD
2. leg3nd - April 8, 2008 5:31 PM
" Unfortunately it costs $600" Thats it? Have you priced a Bape hoodie? At least this ones bullet proff
3. blp - April 8, 2008 5:49 PM
@2. Why link your myspace when it's set to private? I never heard of a $600 dollar hoodie that doesn't have extras like being bulletproof or built in speakers. I hope I get to piss on whoever wastes their money on one in hell.
4. David - April 8, 2008 5:56 PM
Might be good for undercover cops or officers that do vice stings. Then again, walking around with a bullet resistant hoodie might be a tip off.
5. Scott - April 8, 2008 9:14 PM
I don't know about the bulletproof jigger ( I refuse to use the word Hood_ _) but I do believe SmokingGirl loves me.
What a catch! Smokes like a smokinggirl and vodka before noon! She's the Bees Knees!
6. Alche - April 8, 2008 9:30 PM
hahaha, geekologist rocks my world
7. poop - April 9, 2008 3:01 AM
i need it!!!!!
8. Sentral - April 9, 2008 5:05 AM
I've never heard the word jigger before :D Seriously is that an actually used term somewhere? You can just imagine overbearing parents on rough estates saving up to buy their lil hood's one at christmas (aw).
9. Amy - April 9, 2008 7:16 AM
Undercover cops wear real bullet proof vests under their clothes... somehow I don't think this one would be quite as good.
10. SmokingGirl - April 9, 2008 9:42 AM
Of course I love you, Scott. I mean, how can I resist a man who uses Yahoo to look up the origin of phrases.
So you, my dear, are the bee's knees. Mwah dahling. *lites another cigg and takes a sip of coffee*
Vodka doesn't go well with coffee...Baliey's, however, does.
BTW, this bulletproof hoodie is utterly ridiculous. Although I'm sure it will go over well in the hood/project/ghetto/Wal-Mart on the south/west/east side. Are there any gangs from the north side? As you can see, I'm not up to par on where such shenanigans takes place.
Excuse me, I need to get ready for the Country Club. *stumbles away*
11. SmokingGirl - April 9, 2008 9:51 AM
P.S. Scott, tell your mother to buy some stocking garters and then she will no longer have to seduce you with pudding.
Although, you can't have any pudding if you don't eat your meat. So teachers, leave them kids alone.
12. Scott - April 9, 2008 1:53 PM
@8, Jigger is from the latin: Do Jigger
Used to fill in for any noun or verb for that matter. If you'll look in pseudodictionary.com on pg 12 under "J", you will find my submission from many years ago.
Funny you should mention it as I have a list of words men should never use and right at the top is "thingy". Now you can use "jigger" and still maintain your masculinity.
Oh SmokingGirl, I knew you'd come back to me! *sniff* This makes life worth living. You're going to make a wonderful future ex -wife.
13. SmokingGirl - April 9, 2008 2:14 PM
Actually, Scott, "jigger" is a word and it is for measurment, much like pinch or dash. Mixologists use the term jigger to describe a measuring device that they use for hard alcohol and/or juices/syrups.
Jigger is also a word used by rednecks/the uneducated to replace the actual name/term for something. Example:
"Look at that thing-ama-jigger." While pointing at an alternator.
I can't believe you, Scott. How could you not know that? Especially with your Yahoo prowess. I fear our relationship might suffer from this.
14. Billy Avenue - April 9, 2008 2:30 PM
haha.. nice job with the wu tang quote!
15. Scott - April 9, 2008 2:44 PM
SmokingGirl, I am familiar with the word as it pertains to measurement. Many words have different meanings and my meaning is not much different than the one you attribute to rednecks. Did you not read my entire comment?
I will continue to stand behind my meaning. "Thingy" is a feminine word that I refuse to utter. Next thing you know I'll be eating egg white omelets or yogurt with fruit on the bottom.
16. SmokingGirl - April 9, 2008 3:15 PM
You know, you keep typing "thingy", which is almost like uttering it. I'll get your egg white omelets and "fruit at the bottom" yogurt now.
And I didn't actually read your whole comment, Scott. Forgive me. I would tell you that I need a good spanking now, but since you have taken to homo-gurt, I'll have to fine another man who can do that for me.
17. Scott - April 10, 2008 10:14 AM
I knew it!!!! I'll have you know I was gritting my teeth every time I typed that word which I will never type again. However, I still qualify as a man because I never actually uttered it.
Now, about that spanking......
18. andre - April 2, 2009 2:30 AM
i like you galery envia-me and my e-mail
19. louis vuitton - September 29, 2009 1:52 AM
Unfortunately it costs $600" Thats it? Have you priced a Bape hoodie? At least this ones bullet proff