Apr 29 2008Imagine This Thing Sucking Your Brains Out
Festo is an industrial automation company that likes making weird shit that creeps me out. This is proof of that. It's a video of their AirJelly, which is a robotic jellyfish that runs on a lithium-ion battery, an electric motor, and a spot of helium. It reminds me of the "floater" (not of the unsinkable turd variety) aliens that Carl Sagan imagines in Cosmos when describing possible life on a Jupiter-like planet. So, yeah. Now imagine this thing attaching itself to your head and sucking your brains out through a hole it cuts with a special drill bit. It won't take your whole brain though, just enough to get a fix. That way it can come and harvest more brain juice whenever it wants. And if you think hiding underwater is the secret to saving your nog, you're wrong. They've already made the robotic bastards for the seas as well. I guess what I'm getting at here is that Festo is an organization run by robot sympathizers from the future that must be stopped. Unless you're cool being some robot's bitch. And trust me, you shouldn't be. I've had sex with a robot before, and I've got three words to say about the experience: cold, metal, could have used more oil.
A video of the underwater version (and no, it's not just a damn jellyfish) after the jump.
Festo AirJelly flies through the air with the greatest of ease [engadget]
Thanks to Pork Musket, who now has a hot dog shooting attachment, for the tip
Reader Comments
1. Ryan - April 29, 2008 11:34 AM
this this is wierd. oh yea i was first!
2. Bonjoor - April 29, 2008 11:41 AM
Mais c' est absolument IGNOBLE !! Brrrrr....
3. Scott - April 29, 2008 11:45 AM
Yea! What Frenchie said!
4. Manda - April 29, 2008 11:51 AM
Yeah! What Scottie said!
5. Uncle Eccoli - April 29, 2008 11:52 AM
Mother Brain lurks just outside the frame.
6. Shoes - April 29, 2008 11:55 AM
What a beautiful and oddly serene way to die.
7. KRiPPeR - April 29, 2008 12:03 PM
They invented metroids.
http://www.wiiwii.tv/wp-content/uploads/2007/08/a-metroid.jpg
Bad side: They'll suck our brains and kill us all.
Good side: If we are lucky, we'll get to see Samus Aran. w00t!
8. Jumpin_J - April 29, 2008 12:18 PM
Isn't that one of those squidy Matrix killing machines? Holy shit, we're doomed. Where's Neo? He's real too... isn't he? :-()
9. none - April 29, 2008 12:22 PM
really, i just wanted a good gust of wind. Ok ok so they were indoors, maybe a hurricane to blow out the windows and then a gust of wind. that thing is completely and utterly useless. If only i had money to waste like that!
10. SmokingGirl - April 29, 2008 12:29 PM
And what is the point of the air jelly? That's what I still don't get...
11. RiClious - April 29, 2008 12:39 PM
I so need to work for Festo! Looks like they have improved on the Manta ray.
http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=UxPzodKQays
They also made the 'airmotion ride'
http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=CvG5rxVeY5M
The dude driving could at least pretend to be enjoying himself (Insert comment about dull germans here).
12. crazygut - April 29, 2008 1:35 PM
Fake!
13. Freddy K - April 29, 2008 1:49 PM
The air one is pretty cool. Relatively useless, but still cool.
14. Lokuzt - April 29, 2008 2:39 PM
oh well, time to take out the space marine suit...
15. pork musket - April 29, 2008 5:58 PM
curses, my hot dog shooting attachment has been rendered useless by the octo-weenie-slicer-doodad
16. David - April 29, 2008 7:14 PM
That's awesome.
But what possible use could come from it?
17. BlightedArt - April 29, 2008 9:48 PM
... funny URL.
18. groonk - April 30, 2008 1:36 AM
it's Cthulhu Cthursday already?!?
19. blackwinged - April 30, 2008 3:05 AM
cool, my prof helped to build these. atm theyre shown at an exposition in germany.
The latest Hype in swarm intelligence - YES they communicate and cooperate!!!
20. Fatman_III - May 1, 2008 3:43 AM
Uncle Eccoli, you read my mind
21. Peanut Colada - May 1, 2008 6:48 PM
Metroid Prime anyone?
22. butter beer - May 5, 2008 6:00 AM
thats the weirdest and coolest thing i ever seen