Apr 17 2008I Want: Dangerous House Keeps You Young
The Lifespan Extending Villa is a house designed by artists Madeline Gins (!) and Arakawa. It was built in East Hampton, and cost about $2 million to complete. It looks like a giant playground, and I want it. The idea is that constantly being on guard against falling serves as a secret fountain of youth.
In addition to the floor, which threatens to send the un-sure-footed hurtling into the sunken kitchen at the center of the house, the design features walls painted, somewhat disorientingly, in about 40 colors; multiple levels meant to induce the sensation of being in two spaces at once; windows at varying heights; oddly angled light switches and outlets; and an open flow of traffic, unhindered by interior doors or their adjunct, privacy.
All of it is meant to keep the occupants on guard. Comfort, the thinking goes, is a precursor to death; the house is meant to lead its users into a perpetually "tentative" relationship with their surroundings, and thereby keep them young.
Man that is so awesome. I've always wanted to live in a treehouse with rope swings and cargo nets and all that good shit, so this is definitely a step in the right direction. Besides, the house makes you live longer. You just trip over a floor nipple, beat your face into something hard, and presto, you're freaking Methuselah. Simple as that.
Hit the jump for several more pictures of the wackiness, including one of James trying to escape the giant peach.
A House Not For Mere Mortals [unusuallife]
Thanks to Prax, who wants to live in a treehouse just like I do, for the tip
Reader Comments
1. nullCRC - April 17, 2008 10:55 AM
How the hell do you vacuum the floor?
2. daguz - April 17, 2008 10:58 AM
a pole dancers' dream ...
3. KDog - April 17, 2008 11:00 AM
More proof that artists are worthless. Go paint a picture or something and quit thinking you are so damn innovative. Leave real work to the engineers you ass clowns.
4. Scott - April 17, 2008 11:05 AM
So, you come home from a stressful, exhausting day to this even more stressful and exhausting house. Lets be truthful, it makes you die faster not live longer.
Craptastic!
5. nullCRC - April 17, 2008 11:16 AM
FTA:
“It’s immoral that people have to die,” Ms. Gins explained.
What?
6. Brianna - April 17, 2008 11:24 AM
I can't wait for their poor Roomba to shoot itself in the face!
7. damn luddites - April 17, 2008 11:34 AM
the ARTISTS "say its architecture makes people use their bodies in unexpected ways to maintain equilibrium, and that will stimulate their immune systems." I'm glad that we can now get all of our science and artistry needs from a single source. Can't wait until scientists start redecorating the space shuttle, and doctors decide that painting your house will cure cancer.
"They ought to build hospitals like this,” she said. yeah, I'd like to see them wheel a stretcher through there.
8. Tank - April 17, 2008 12:00 PM
reminds me of a nightmare i had in the 80's
9. BrokenJosh - April 17, 2008 12:45 PM
I like how you could easily fall onto the stove burners if you weren't paying attention one night.
10. Scott - April 17, 2008 1:11 PM
@7 said: "and doctors decide that painting your house will cure cancer."
Not unless Pfizer makes the paint and the doctors get a kickback.
11. SmokingGirl - April 17, 2008 2:32 PM
God, how inane. BTW, we ALL die, sooner or later. I hope this doesn't surprise someone who assumed that living in a Fun House will keep them alive forever.
I cannot WAIT until a plague of biblical proportions comes along and kills off all the idiots. Where are the flying vipers when one needs them?
12. Butts - April 17, 2008 2:54 PM
This is a wonderful idea, until you accidentally trip on the floor designed to make you trip and smash your head into the dinner table that's resting one foot off the ground.
13. Mr Hampton - April 17, 2008 7:28 PM
That's "East Hampton", not "the East Hamptons". I'm from Southampton, and I'll be damned if I'm going to be lumped in together with those inbred mouth-breathers from parts slightly east. Who also, apparently, live in Death Houses.
14. meme - April 17, 2008 9:50 PM
East Hampton, NY? or East Hampton, England? (Looks like you combined the name of the town East Hampton and The Hamptons) Because if you mean NY they took a million dollar piece of land (not exaggerating here) and built that piece of crap?? Money can't buy taste.
15. Shoes - April 17, 2008 11:24 PM
Taste, functionality, and safety be damned! I'd bloody live there.
16. jakebarnes - April 18, 2008 12:28 AM
You know what else is a precursor to death besides COMFORT? Heart Disease. But you don't see anyone making houses out of celery!
17. Lindsay - April 18, 2008 4:02 AM
Hahahaha floor nipple. Amazing.
18. Lindsay - April 18, 2008 4:09 AM
Oh, and I'd like to see what their bed looks like.
19. ghengis khunt - April 18, 2008 12:07 PM
If comfort is a precursor to death - and being kicked in the face is an extreme discomfort - then I am hereby off to vastly prolong Madeline Gins life.
20. Winnipeg - April 18, 2008 12:26 PM
#11 A flying viper just bit me. Is that bad?
21. cxz - April 18, 2008 8:29 PM
lol @8
I'm not one of those art freaks but I think the house is cool.
All that's missing is the sign in front that says "Pee Wee's Playhouse"
22. hahayousuck - April 19, 2008 1:42 AM
do you have to shit in a colorful funnel that is weaved in fun shapes through out the entire house?? .... which is then dyed fun colors and made into jello??
eh, i could totally live there.... with out the jello poop coloring tunnel.
23. Mike Brown - April 20, 2008 10:20 PM
Would be a great idea for a skate park. TM and patent pending yesterday.
24. kirsten - April 23, 2008 8:53 PM
im like amazingly late on this... but honestly....
if they have a guest over and the guest falls into sunken kitchen....
and dies.....
not only would it be ironic... but itd also be an amazing court case...
and those people in the picture look like they use drugs to be 'creative'
which explains the house...
however... if you were high.. i dont know how you would survive in there...
in turn i just contraicted myself....