Mar 5 2008Quantum Sleeper Bed Protects From Chemical Attacks, Natural Disasters And Kidnappers
The Quantum Sleeper is essentially a saferoom built around a bed. It comes packed with all the following features:
1.25" Polycarbonate Bulletproof Plating/Shielding, Bio-Chemical Filtered Ventilation, Rebreather, Control Panel Mode Selection (i.e., Basic System Ops., Intruder Setting, Energy Status, Lock Down, etc.), Cover & Door Actuators w/ Emergency Release, One way see through head cover (reflective mirror on 2 sides and front), Safety Features (Proximity Sensor, O2 Sensor, Smoke Det., Motion Det. Ect,), Emergency Communication system (Cellular, Short-wave Radio, CB etc.), Audio Amplifier (Amplify sound from outside unit), Air/Water Tight Sealing, External Override Key Pad & Remote Control, Battery Backup Power, Toiletry system
Wow, looks like they've got all the bases covered for overprotective parents and people who are afraid of everything. Too bad I saw that movie Panic Room with Jodie Foster and she was totally not hot. Completely turned me off to panic and safe rooms. However this bed does come with options for a microwave and refrigerator. Make sure to add The Rack and then you might have something worth investing in. Unfortunately models start at over $100,000 -- so chances are you'll just have to die instead.
Thanks to Karolyn, who doesn't need one of these because she's a certified ass-kicking machine, for the tip
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Reader Comments
1. meow - March 5, 2008 12:09 PM
first~~~~
coffin<3
2. guate6 - March 5, 2008 12:25 PM
It doesn't look like it's got enough room for making with the oompa loompa. No? Doing the nasty! Still no? A horizontal expression of a vertical wish (read: opposite of tango). C'mon I mean SEX. If I knew the end of the world were coming, I'd want to go out happy.
3. PB&J - March 5, 2008 12:55 PM
Wow plywood has made some technological advancements over the years.
4. blp - March 5, 2008 12:55 PM
Yeah but will it protect me from my mother who always wakes me up by pulling off y duvet and/or poking me? She somehow gets through locked doors and home made cardboard box fortresses and mazes.
5. daguz - March 5, 2008 1:44 PM
Man, I love it. Air tight. My boss suggested that it monitor your vital signs. Then if it does not detect anything it automatically pops up with a headstone. Now that would be oh-so-cool.
6. Karolyn - March 5, 2008 3:18 PM
Yay, thank you for posting this!
7. Sarah - March 5, 2008 5:30 PM
That is just creepy. What kind of person buys this?? I've seen enough apocalyptic movies that I would rather not survive.
8. proteon - March 5, 2008 5:36 PM
This shit is at least five years old which is four years older than your pubic hair ya nubs.
9. guate6 - March 5, 2008 6:05 PM
Haha, #8 is retarded. Pubic hair renews itself (similar to skin), so no one's pubic hair is that old.
10. Harumpf - March 6, 2008 12:37 PM
Where do you pee? Trapped in a bed for days awaiting the end is one thing but man my bladder is soooo tiny.
11. Hannah Mc.blubus - March 9, 2008 6:08 AM
WOW!...can i get me one of those?Those are SOOOO cool!not to mention the lil compartmens for food....at least i think its for food...and no?i dont get #8 at all...prob. cuz im only 12 :)
12. veronica g - April 4, 2008 6:02 PM
casket, anyone???