Mar 28 2008 NASA Testing Lunar Chariot Vehicle For Moon, I Wouldn't Be Caught Dead On It
This is NASA's Lunar Chariot, a six wheeled, all-wheel-drive, all-wheel-steering vehicle for the moon mission scheduled in 2020. It will be used to bulldoze roads, dig trenches, and drill for minerals on the moon thanks to its numerous attachments. Now I find this fascinating and all, and you know I love outerspace as much as the next boy-astronaut, but I still have one problem -- it's fugly as hell. It looks like a mechanical crab with wheels.
Aliens exist. And since the moon is a logical place for visiting aliens to stop for a cold drink, snacks, and to use the pisser before hitting earth, we should make the best impression possible. Now what if they come and see this goofy bastard lumbering around? They're going to laugh at us. Get with it NASA! I'll be damned if I miss my opportunity to score sweet alien poon because you were too cheap to make a cooler looking moon vehicle.
Video of the testing after the jump.
Continue Reading " NASA Testing Lunar Chariot Vehicle For Moon, I Wouldn't Be Caught Dead On It "
Mar 28 2008 For The Ladies: Golden Girl 24 Karat Facials
Are you an independently wealthy woman? A gold(!) digger? Do you like blowing wads of cash? If so you may want to consider this 24 karat luxury facial treatment. For about $360 you can get an 80-minute gold leafing of your face.
Ron Razeggi, U.S. chief operating officer of the manufacturer, UMO, said: "The skin tries to reject the gold because it's a foreign object. In order to do that, it builds new cells."Right now, the body produces new cells every 28 days. But this accelerates the cell-building and, as a result, it firms and tightens the skin."
Well there you have it ladies, straight from the jackass's mouth. In all honesty though, if you're a woman and reading this website I'm confident you're already beautiful inside and out (not to mention intelligent and complete with a great sense of humor) and don't need this crap. Besides, you don't even get to keep the gold after the treatment.
Spa strikes gold with the anti-aging 24-karat facial [dailymail]
Thanks to Silas, who is practically made of precious metals, for the tip
Mar 28 2008 Aquarium Bathtub Is Sweet, Too Expensive
The Moody Acquario is a $14,500 bathtub that has an aquarium on the side. It looks like the tank and tub are separated by a little space, which is smart because I was wondering how the fish would be able to withstand the heat transfer from my boiling baths. I love aquariums so I'm all about it. Minus, of course, the $14,500 price tag. I'm pretty confident you could build yourself one of these though without too much trouble. Or you can do what any normal damn person would, and bathe in your damn fishtank. But be warned: Don't just go throwing yourself in there lest you find a ceramic pirate ship up your ass.
Moody Acquario: Bathing With The Fishes [gizmodo]
Mar 28 2008 Cigarette Pack Cell Phone Is Sneaky, Smokey
This is a cell phone disguised as a pack of Marlboro cigarettes that'll set you back about $175 in China. It rocks dualband GSM, a microSD card slot, and can play MP3's.
From the front, it looks like a real pack of Marlboros. You can even put real cigarettes in it. But secretly, it's a cell phone. The best part is the side-mounted camera feature - people might be looking for you to take cell phone pictures, but they'll never suspect your cigs! This phone is available in Taipei's ShiLin night market, next to the toilet-themed restaurant.
Ah yes, the infamous toilet-themed restaurant. A regular mecca for novelty cell phone lovers. Seriously though, great Poopoo Platter.
Chinese Cigarette Phone Looks Like a Pack of Marlboros [boingboing]
Mar 28 2008 Watch Bears Sad Reminder, I Am Depressed
My life is filled with enough depressing thoughts as it is, so I don't have much interest in being reminded of my mortality whenver I want to know what time it is. But for you sickos out there that like thinking about your own death, maybe The Accurate Watch is for you. It costs $145 and features an hour and minute hand that, together, read "remember you will die". Wow, like my wife's handgun isn't reminder enough.
The Accurate Watch Reminds You Of Unavoidable Death [ohgizmo]
Mar 28 2008 International Dance Party Box Has Radar, Rewards Your Dancing With Lights, Smoke
International Dance Party is a dance party in a box.
The machine comes as a large, non-suspicious looking flightcase. Internally, it is equipped with cutting edge radar sensing technology, an ear blasting state of the art 600W sound system, tons of psychedelic light and laser effects, and even a professional grade fog machine.
Through its dance activity radar, the International Dance Party detects and evaluates motion input from surrounding people in realtime. Several sophisticated transforming mechanisms let the flightcase turn into a powerful and boosting party machine, once the visitors start to dance within the machine's range of perception.The audience controls the complexity of the generated music and the intensity of the light effects directly by the energy of its dance action. When there is no audience, or when the audience is not active enough, the machine stops its performance and transforms back into a transport crate.
Sweet, a fully functional dance party in a box! This is just what we need to take our apartment dance parties to the next level. That next level being anything better than our last dance party. Which, incidentally, was just my roommate grinding my ass after I passed out on the couch.
P.S.: Josh -- that shit was wrong. I want you to move out.
Worthwhile (but long) explanation and demo of the device after the jump.
Mar 28 2008 Mr. T Cookie Jar Keeps Cookies Safe, Fool!
Listen up, fool! Stuff your cookies in my head and I'll help keep them fresh and safe from annoying rugrats. And if I catch one standing on a stool trying to get at them I'll bite the little bastard's fingers off. I'm Mr. T, damnit. I pity the fool that tries to get up in my dome piece and steal cookies. F***, I need more necklaces. My head feels light enough to float off. Quick, more bling, I got no time for the jibba-jabba!
Mr. T's World of Warcraft commercial and a must see music video called Treat Your Mother Right, after the jump.
Continue Reading " Mr. T Cookie Jar Keeps Cookies Safe, Fool! "
Mar 28 2008 Last Supper With Video Game Characters
Ever wonder what da Vinci's Last Supper would look like with video game characters? Possibly something like this. Except why on earth is Donkey Kong portraying Jesus? That's sacrilege if I've ever seen it. And Mario as Judas? So wrong. Mario or Link should be Jesus, and Princess Peach should be giving them all a table dance.
The LEGO Last Supper from Brick Testament after the jump. It's been posted here before, but I'm doing it again. Why? Because I <3 Jesus.
Mar 27 2008 Steve Jobs Picture Made Of Apple Products
This is a picture of Steve Jobs made entirely out of Apple products. Its collage nature loosely reminds me of the Star Wars Last Supper, except that one was an awesome scene with Darth Vader and Luke Skywalker, and this one is Steve Jobs. It was created for a special in Fortune magazine.
Originally made in December 2007 and corrected in February 2008 to include the latest Apple products like MacBook Air, iPod nano pink etc. Made with Synthetik Studio Artist, Adobe Photoshop and Apple QuickTime Pro with custom developed scripts and techniques.
I was so inspired by this technique that I decided to make my own collage self-portrait that really exemplifies who I am as a human. Unfortunately, I ran out of pictures of dongs and assholes before I could finish.
Full Size Flickr Picture
via
Incredible Steve Jobs Portrait Made From Apple Products [techeblog]
Mar 27 2008 Drum Table Makes Noise If You Bang On It
The Musical Rumba Table, from MusicalFurnishings.com, makes noise when you bang around on it. That's because it's actually a table with different percussion instruments attached to the underside of the individual tiles. You can even customize your piece by choosing from the 12 available percussion modules (cowbell, tambourine, snare, bongo, etc.). They come in sizes from 2' x 2' ($800) to 4' x 4' ($2,900) and might be worth it if you can't eat dinner without musical accompaniment. Or you could, oh I don't know, just eat a lot of beans. Toot toot! Seriously though, this seems like a great buy. Just look how much fun those people in the picture are having. Tons. It's like an African drumming circle, but a square. And with no Africans, just a bunch of pasty white people.
Video of someone beatin' the ol' blocks after the jump.
Continue Reading " Drum Table Makes Noise If You Bang On It "
Mar 27 2008 Star Wars Golf Bags Shouldn't Have Made It
Come on Star Wars franchise, get with program. With all the other awesome products you had to choose from to release you pick freaking golf bags? WTF!? These golf bags are made in Japan, come in Stormtrooper or Darth Vader styling, cost about $500, and are stupid. Mostly because I'm pissed they didn't release any of that other, cooler stuff instead. I mean Jesus, Star Wars franchise, at least get creative. How about an AT-AT golf cart instead? Death Star golf balls? I mean this thing could have at least been shaped like R2 for Skywalker's sake. #$&!!%! %)#@!!)$#! Star Wars: Episodes 1 and 2 - Attack Of The Phantom French Ticklers am I furious right now.
Another detail picture after the jump.
Continue Reading " Star Wars Golf Bags Shouldn't Have Made It "
Mar 27 2008 Plasma Speakers: Awesome As You'd Expect
Plasma speakers have apparently existed since the 50's, but I'd never heard of them because my life up until this point has sucked. The speakers use a plasma arc to create compression waves instead of the traditionally boring magnets and cones. The "pitch is altered by the constantly shifting intensity of the plasma arc (the creator puts the frequency response range at 200Hz to 12kHz, and the speaker runs at 50W)." Kind of reminds me of the Tesla Coil music maker we saw awhile ago. This video is of an FM-based prototype, which I opted to use on the front page instead of the completed setup after the jump, because I just couldn't bring myself to post a video playing Hold Me Now by the Thompson Twins on the main page.
Continue Reading " Plasma Speakers: Awesome As You'd Expect "
Mar 27 2008 For Geekologie Ladies: A 360 Degree Mirror
This mirror is made so you can see all angles of your head at one time. "The 360 Degree Mirror saves you from constantly twisting your neck while you style your hair by featuring a seven panel 360 view that makes all angles visible simultaneously." It costs $40 and the middle mirror is illuminated using three AAA's. I don't need one though. I know what the back of my head looks like. It's bald(ing) and looks like shit. I'd prefer to go right on thinking that it doesn't exist. I'm sure the wife would go apenuts for one of these though. She's always doing her hair up like that chick in the picture. How she can control a blowdryer and brush at the same time is a mystery to me. Must be a woman thing. Like complaining and buying shoes. Ooooh, burn!
UPDATE: Just kidding ladies, that was a joke. Like your driving. HAHA, gotcha again!
UPDATE: Wife...Has...Balls...In...Vice...Is...Searching...For...Hammer...SOS
360 Degree Mirror [trendhunter]
Thanks to Sebastian, which I would name my son if I was still able to procreate, for the tip
Mar 27 2008 Photoshop Express Available Online For Free
Photoshop Express, the long anticipated free photo manipulation tool is now online and accepting members. You ever get a complementary 2GB of storage when you sign up. Someone go ahead and join and give us some feedback in the comments section about what all you can do with it. I'd do it, but I can't compromise the security of my private photos. Because they're private. Read: of privates. Mine.
Thanks to Anthony, who takes pictures like nobody's business, for the tip
Mar 27 2008 Footlume Lights Up The Way With Butterflies
The Footlume is being developed at London South Bank University and will be displayed in London later this month. It's a rug. With lights that come on when you walk on it. That look like butterflies. It runs on rechargeable batteries and is questionable because what good is a lighted rug if, by the time it turns on, you're nowhere near it? Ah, for aesthetic purposes, I see. Well could I maybe get some skulls instead of butterflies? It's not that I don't like them, it's just that, well, they're a little feminine for my taste. Sure I wear Secret deodorant, but that's only because it doesn't leave stains on my white shirts. And its pH balance really works with my body.
Michael Jackson Was On To Something [albotas]
Mar 27 2008 Donkey Kong Jungle Juice Is A Misnomer
We've seen several video game inspired energy drinks here at Geekologie, and even a Nintendo offering, but now comes another -- Donkey Kong Jungle Juice. Spotted at the Nintendo World Store in New York, the drink comes packed with all those sperm-reducing agents* energy drinks are known for. Apparently the concoction is pink, smells like bubble gum, and has the flavor of carbonated Kool-Aid. There are theories circulating that it's the exact same stuff that's in the Mario can, and I wouldn't be surprised if it was. You can score a can from Anime Castle for $2.25 if you still want to try. I'm going to pass though, as a matter of principle. Everyone knows jungle juice is alcoholic and does not come in a Donkey Kong can. No sir, jungle juice is a combination of Everclear and every other kind of liquor you have in your college apartment mixed with Hawaiian Punch and Sunny D. You scoop it right out of the cooler it was mixed in with a Solo cup. It gets you drunk as shit and makes you puke and pass out on the bathroom floor while people bash your brain in with the door trying to get in to take a piss.
*This statement has not been evaluated by the FDA. It has, however, been evaluated by Deez Nuts.
donkey kong jungle juice doesn't taste like bananas [technabob]
Mar 26 2008 Robotic Bigdog Beta Early Testing Video
Remember Bigdog, the scary as hell and very lifelike robot mule/dog? Well here's a video of an even earlier rendition of the beast. And I must say, I feel much less compassion for this version than the new one. When this one got kicked over I was actually hoping it'd fall over and break its legs. I mean, it's not lifelike at all. I cared so little I was even secretly praying a hunter would spot the pathetic bastard and put it out of its misery with several well placed bullets to the abdominal region.
Video of BigDog Beta Quadruped Robot Is So Stupid It's Hilarious [gizmodo]
Mar 26 2008 Finger Piano Toy Came With Kid's Magazine
Another video after the jump proving beyond the shadow of a doubt it's practically a fully functional piano you wear on your hand.
Continue Reading " Finger Piano Toy Came With Kid's Magazine "
Mar 26 2008 Flush The John With A Step Of Your Foot
A toilet flushing handle can contain up to 50,000 bacteria per square inch. So I'll stop licking them, but I'm not going to drop $20 on the Footflush. The Footflush is a foot shaped (because you'd have no idea how the f*** to use it otherwise) device you step on in order to flush the john. They hook up to any regular toilet and make the world a better place for germaphobes and people with no arms. But here's a novel idea -- that's free -- kick the damn handle like a normal person. I don't care if it is a little-handled home toilet, you kick that mother. You do it on the big handles in public restrooms, why not at home as well? I prefer the running jumpkick technique. However, due to its difficulty I can only recommend it for intermediate/advanced level kickers. Basically you run, jump, and kick. But be warned: one time I was pissing at Arby's and went up for the flush but miscalculated and ended up busting through the wall and into the kitchen. I told them the commode exploded and demanded a free turnover.
Mar 26 2008 London Tower To House 100,000 People
London needs to find room to house 100,000 more people by 2016. One solution is this thing, a massive 5,000-foot tall tower (must see picture of the whole thing after the jump) design by the Populararchitecture firm. Reminds me of the plans for Japan's massive building, but this one is less pyramidal and more phallical.
The tower, which at this point remains simply a novel idea, would take up little actual ground space and run like a proper democracy. It is literally broken up into municipal areas--the "neighborhood" is a singe floor of 600; the village is 20 floors and houses 6,000. There are also three super-districts that house 33,000 people each.Elected reps serve in a local government and have regular meetings to decide what to do with common areas, which would include an ice skating rink, a botanical garden, an open-air theater, and tennis courts.
Shit, did that just say tennis courts? Sold! How soon can I sign a lease?
Make sure to hit the jump to see the ridiculously tall tower in full effect.
Mar 26 2008 Questionable: Tactile Feedback iPhone Thing
My Touch Keys are little static-cling cutouts you put on top of your iPhone's screen. They're supposed to help you hit the non-physical keys easier and provide tactile feedback when you're typing. Allegedly you can interact through the screen, so it won't affect the rest of the display's usability. They cost $8 for two so if you have monster sausage fingers like my girlfriend you may want to consider giving them a go. Of course she doesn't have an iPhone so it's not a problem. Or any phone for that matter. She doesn't need one because she doesn't have any friends, and if I need her I just yell. Don't worry folks, she knows I'm just pulling her chain. Literally, the one that keeps her tethered to the stove. Now go ahead and put my frozen pizza in the oven, honey.
my touch keys add tactile feedback to iphone, sorta. [technabob]
Mar 26 2008 Tetrad Shelving Looks Good, Tetrisy
These Tetrad Shelves are made by Brave Space Design in Brooklyn, NY. They come in a variety of different options and are built using environmentally sustainable resources. Unfortunately they will deplete your financial resources if you want some. You have to contact them for the price of one like in the picture, but if you hit the jump and see the colored set, those go for $1,500 per 10 blocks. So, yeah, you might want to try making your own. I just hope you're a better carpenter than I am, because I had to cease construction and seek medical attention after nailing my hand to my junk.
See more models after the jump, along with a link to the company's website.
Mar 26 2008 It's About Time: Apple Files Patent For 3-D Display, See You Soon Princess Leia *wink*
This is a diagram from the patent Apple filed on the 20th for a 3-D Holographic Display.
The patent application goes on to assert that two-dimensional projections of 3-D scenes are inadequate. "Without the benefit of 3-D rendering, even high quality images that have excellent perspective depictions still appear unrealistic and flat," it says. "No headgear needs to be worn by the observer. "In one embodiment, the system of the present invention provides a stereoscopic 3-D display and viewing experience; in another, it delivers a realistic holographic 3-D display experience."
Sweet, 3-D. Not to brag or anything, but I see real life in 3-D. Does that make me better than everyone else? Yes. It's a scientific fact that most people only see in 3-C. Unless I've got things backwards and 3-C is actually an improvement over 3-D. In that case I see in 3-A, which is practically x-ray vision. That's right folks, boobs.
Apple files patent for holographic 3-D display [eetimes]
Thanks to Dan, who can see in 5-A because he's from the future, for the tip
Mar 26 2008 Canoflauge Can Covers Hide Your Beer
Canoflauge can covers are made out of vinyl and printed to look like soda cans. You just wrap one around a cold beer, and presto, time to drink in public. I think they could have done a little better with the names, but whatever, you'll have your hand around it anyways. The (reusable) set of four costs $5.89. Mine arrived this morning, so I'll take a stroll around town and let you know how they work.
UPDATE: I was out of beer so I just stuck two of them on a bottle of Jagermeister. It wasn't very convincing, a cop on a Segway arrested me. Someone please post bail. No rush though, I think my cell-mate is a personal trainer and we're going to do some exercising. Great guy, said he's really gonna give my ass a workout.
Canoflauge: This Isn't Beer Officer, It's a Refreshing Can of Skunkpiss [gizmodo]
Thanks to Bianca, who has one of my favorite names, for the tip
Mar 25 2008 Robot Watches Kids While Parents Shop
This scary little bastard is a robotic babysitter developed by Tmsuk and currently being utilized by a retailer in Fukuoka, Japan. It looks like a cross between a cat, the devil, a shitty digital camera, and a bumper car. The unit packs an integrated projector and can communicate with annoying little kids through the use of a special tags the rugrats have to wear. No word on how much the robots cost, but I bet they're expensive. And ridiculous. My dad didn't need a babysitter for me when we went shopping. No sir, he just lashed me to the front of the shopping cart. Plus, whenever I misbehaved he'd teach me "valuable life lessons" about how long scars take to heal by running me into displays and other people's carts. *sniffle* Love ya, dad.
Robot babysitter keeps kids occupied in Japanese store [engadget]
Thanks to Shawn, who can destroy robots with just a stare, for the tip
Mar 25 2008 Really Awesome Alphabet Pop-Up Book
ABC3D is a pop-up book featuring the alphabet. Each letter is displayed in a creative way. I watched the video two times. I really liked the music too. They're available for pre-order on Amazon for $20, which isn't too bad. Unfortunately you can't use it to teach your children the alphabet because then they'll never be able to recognize letters in 2D.
Popup by Marion Bataille [fubiz]
Thanks to Romain, who can spell anyone's ass off, for the tip
Mar 25 2008 Man Allegedly Kills Himself With A Robot
Allegedly an 81 year-old man in Australia killed himself with a robot that he found the plans to build on the internet. The robot held a .22 pistol and fired when the dude pushed a button or something. Now call me crazy, but I don't think we're getting the full story here.
Evidence: 81 year-olds don't know how to use the internet. If they do it's to sign on to AOL and download a shit-ton of viruses or give their bank account information to a Nigerian exile.
Evidence: No 81 year-old can build a robot. All the geriatrics I know don't do anything but piss themselves and suck at guessing prices on The Price Is Right because their brains are so f***ed.
So what can we conclude from this? Government. Conspiracy. Just kidding. But I will tell you what really happened. This man obviously built the robot a long time ago, when he was still reasonably sane (probably in his late 40's - 50's). Then his hearing started to go. Over the years he had to turn the volume on the television up louder and louder in order to watch Matlock and old Westerns. One day the robot got fed up with the noise, ordered a gun online, and blasted him. Case. Closed.
Is This Rubbish Bin a Suicide Machine? [boingboing]
Picture (minus that awesome gun I added) via Emily O on Flickr
Mar 25 2008 Trapeze Chandelier: Start Your Own Circus Act At Home And Break Lots Of Stuff
The Do Swing is a trapeze chandelier. It's currently conceptual but you could probably make your own as long as you found a solid stud running in the ceiling somewhere. Blah, blah, blah are those coke whores stretched out on the table? Why wasn't I invited to this party? The chick on the left is totally about to flash the camera. The far right one is drinking and peeing on the rug simultaneously. The crazy drunk is swinging from the chandelier and one of the coke queens is looking up her skirt. All the while the skanky one on the table is trying to nonchalantly size up the camera man's package. Advertising people: this is how you sell products. I just called the company and ordered ten. They told me they're still just conceptual but I told they could keep my money anyways.
Mar 25 2008 Raytheon Tool Blows Through Concrete
The Raytheon Controlled Impact Rescue Tool (CIRT) weighs 100 pounds and can smash through concrete walls. The product has rescue in its name, but I assure you it'll be busting down all kind of walls where the primary objective isn't to save anyone. A little slow though Raytheon, because I've had one of these for years. It's called a jealous girlfriend. She thinks she hears another girl's voice on the other side of locked door/wall and she'll tear through it like a wet paper bag with a chocolate bar inside.
Worthwhile video of the unit in action after the jump.
Mar 25 2008 Wooden Knuckles Are One Size Fits Most, Made Of Wood, Not Metal Or Glass Silly!
These wooden knuckles are made of walnut and cost $40. Why you'd buy them is a mystery to me, because if you're not going to dip your gluey hand in a barrel of broken glass before a fist fight then you're a sissy. Say, these remind me of that time in Raiders of the Lost Ark when Indiana was chasing after Marion because she was being kidnapped in a basket when some dude with a sword jumped out of the crowd to try and stop him. There dude was, swinging his sword around and shit, and you know what Indy did? Indy just shot that mother. "Bad dates!" Damn I love that movie. If the new one sucks I'm hanging myself.
Wooden Knuckles [notcot]
Mar 25 2008 Mega Man 2 Scarf Sadly Doesn't Come With That Sultry Model Or The Awesome Hat
This is a Mega Man 2 themed scarf that has all the robot bosses on it. As you can see there's, um, Fan Man. And Frog Dude. Was that sacrilegious? Fine, Air Man and Bubble man. It's for sale if you want it, but it costs $150. It is, however, one of a kind. It is not, however, not bright yellow. Damn I'm in love with that girl in the picture. It's like she's looking into my soul and likes what she sees. Which is probably the potato salad and Fruit Rollup I had for breakfast.
One more of the detail after the jump.
Continue Reading " Mega Man 2 Scarf Sadly Doesn't Come With That Sultry Model Or The Awesome Hat "
Mar 25 2008 Crack Deal Caught On Google Maps?
Allegedly this is a picture of a crack deal caught using the "Street View" feature on Google Maps. It's in Chicago. Now why everyone is jumping to the conclusion that this is some kind of drug deal is beyond me. I'm sure there's a logical explanation for the picture that doesn't involve illicit substances, and I think this is it: Somebody was lost, and pulled over for directions. The guy in the picture there knows the area really well, so he provided significant help. The driver was so happy about this that they tipped the man graciously with a handful of cash. See? Perfect sense. It's just a good Samaritan being handsomely rewarded. For selling the best rocks in Chicago.
See the real close-up picture of the deal after the jump.
Mar 24 2008 Monocycle Only Seats One For A Reason
Because there's no way in hell a woman would ever want to get on that thing with you. It just screams "I can juggle and perform magic tricks". Not that you juggling magicians out there aren't cool. You're just cool in a way that doesn't make women want to have sex with you. Anyways, if you're a risk taker and still want one the cycle has a 31cc engine, top speed of 25MPH, and a half gallon of fuel will get you two hours of riding enjoyment. It costs $13,000, which is more than a nice used car. Which would be a lot more practical. A nice used cat, however, would not be. Unless it was Cringer, He-Man's Battle Cat. Did I really just go there? Damn yeah I did. Castle Grayskull bitches, what?
Frightening Looking Motorized Monocycle [uberreview]
Mar 24 2008 More Robots Of The Coming Apocalypse
In the near future the planet will be ruled by robots and any surviving humans will live huddled in caves crying about how it was a bad idea to create them in the first place. So yeah, be warned. This is a video of a climbing robot. It looks friendly and harmless enough, but deep down, just like every robot, it wants to kill.
Called Capuchin, the robot scales vertical walls using four limbs that can shift its weight to stay balanced. It and other climbing robots could be key to uncovering the geology of Mars.
Weight shifting robot, cool. But you know what would be cooler? If it had guns. And bombs. Ooh ooh ooh -- and a laser razor chainsaw for an arm. Now that would be a damn robot.*
*Until one actually kills me, robots with weapons will remain awesome.
Thanks to Raul, a man capable of surviving the robot apocalypse, for the tip
Mar 24 2008 World's Coolest Bowser Tattoo Is Damn Cool
This is by far the awesomest Bowser tattoo in the known universe (and there are lots) but unfortunately this pasty clown beat me to it. I bet it's his Myspace profile picture too. Bastard.
Multi Tasking Boswer Tattoo [albotas]
Mar 24 2008 Forget Shooting Clay Pigeons, Go For Flying Cars. Top Gear Shows Us How It's Done.
Shooting Flying Cars with Machine Guns, Rocket Launchers [gizmodo]
Mar 24 2008 Human-like Homer Is Scarier Than I Thought
Remember the human Mario rendering from last week? Well here comes Homer.
This one was a bit more difficult in that i wanted the light to come in mainly from one side with a bit of back light. So all my reference had to be lit from one side. For textures i needed but didn't have this lighting situation, i had to darken or light a bit to give the same effect.For clarification, these aren't studies of what Homer would look like if he was a real person, its just what a cartoon like Homer would look like if he kept his toon proportions but had realistic texturing and lighting. I find this slightly less disturbing than the Mario one. :) Some might feel he looks too old, keep in mind he was in his 30's 20 years ago when the show first started. ;)
Great job, he looks scary as shit. I do like how you used my penis model for the nose though. Nice touch.
Pixeloo Homer Simpson [notcot]
Mar 24 2008 Grandma, You Old Bat, I Said "YOU LOOK FREAKING RIDICULOUS WEARING THOSE"
Batphones were designed by Matthias Ries to help the hard of hearing look funny. They're basically a pair of shaped plastic cups you wear like headphones. I got a pair for my grandma and she loves them. ISN'T THAT RIGHT GRANDMA? I SAID "ISN'T THAT RIGHT?" Damn she still can't hear for shit. Oh, it looks like she dozed off. And is drooling. On my couch. Awesome.
Grandma for sale. Free grandma. Goes by Beatrice. Old exterior, but young at heart. Runs great but may leak fluids on your expensive furniture. Cooks, but not that well and often forgets the stove is on. May present a fire hazard.
Continue Reading " Grandma, You Old Bat, I Said "YOU LOOK FREAKING RIDICULOUS WEARING THOSE" "
Mar 24 2008 Robot Drummer Is Cute, Makes Me Emotional
Whenever I see a cute robot I always get a little emotional. Mostly because of that movie with the little robots in it where the one gets injured and dies. Or maybe it doesn't die, I can't remember. I just know I was sadder than hell. What was the name of that movie? Let me do some searching. BATTERIES NOT INCLUDED! *sniffle* Oh my God somebody give me a box of tissues.
Okay I'm holding it down. Meet Yellow Drum Machine. He's a little robot that cruises around the room running into things. When he hits something that seems like it might make a pretty noise he bangs on it a couple of times and takes audio samples. If he likes what he hears he busts out with a little beat using his metal tinker and another butt bopper. He was constructed by robot hacker fritsl out of a bunch of random parts, including, but not limited to: a PICAXE 28 microcontroller, a sound sampler, and a cheese crate. Damn is he cute or what? If I do ever have a child with my Roomba mistress, I can only hope he comes out looking half as handsome. And with treads. So I can ride on him like a tank. Tankboy, take me to the liquor store.
Two worthwhile videos after the jump, one of him playing a glass of fruit punch, and another of him playing the wall in somebody's bathroom.
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Mar 24 2008 Shirt Allegedly Protects From Knife Slashes
This shirt from Nihon Uni of Japan allegedly protects its wearer from knife attacks. But be warned -- only slashes, NOT stabs. They cost anywhere from $190-$522 for short-sleeved models and $220-$590 for the long. The shirts are constructed of a ultrahigh molecular weight polyethylene fiber that's 3x the strength of cotton. Apparently they were designed to address the recent increase in knife attacks on convenience store clerks and children in Japan. If these really help then I'm all for them. However I'm going to hold out for the stab proof version myself. When the wife gets mad she doesn't get all slashy on me, she gets stabby. And, on more than one occasion, shooty.
Meshy T-shirt from Japan protects you from Knife attacks but not Shurikens [newlaunches]
