Feb 8 2008Patent 5163447: The Musical Prophylactic
Patent 5163447 describes a "force-sensitive, sound-playing condom." The safety device features "a chip-controlled piezoelectric sound transducer (18) which plays a melody or voiced message when during intercourse the contacts of the sound-playing unit are closed and the transducer is activated." The inventor, Paul Lyons, actually sent me a few samples in time for Valentine's last year, but the results proved disastrous. Apparently the Star Wars theme didn't make my girlfriend as amorous as it made me. Neither did the Darth Vader mask I insisted she wear.
The uncensored picture after the jump.
Great Invention Idea? A Musical Condom [inventorspot]
Thanks to Ben Hurr, who always makes beautiful music with the ladies, for the tip
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Reader Comments
1. Superevil - February 8, 2008 1:40 PM
I'm sold, but only if it plays circus music.
2. damn luddites - February 8, 2008 1:57 PM
but patent 5162447 is for a process for making a thermoplastic resin composition. nothing to do with musical condoms.
you meant patent 5163447
3. samuel - February 8, 2008 2:01 PM
damn luddites, you REALLY need on of these. And a prositute.
4. samuel - February 8, 2008 2:02 PM
prostitute
5. damn luddites - February 8, 2008 2:33 PM
thanks for correcting yourself - imagine all the time I'd have wasted looking for a prositute.
I don't need a musical condom, cause when I make sweet love to a woman, she hears angels sing
6. samuel - February 8, 2008 2:36 PM
Note that someone didn't deny the need of a pro...
I'm sorry dude, just pulling your leg. You keep singing....
7. damn luddites - February 8, 2008 2:41 PM
don't about the pros that you go to, but the ones around here insist on a condom (singing is optional)
8. Dr_Freak - February 8, 2008 4:54 PM
Could this be the start of the new "Geeks guide to better sex"? If you're doing it wrong, you could have John Cleese telling you "Give her a kiss boy...You don't have to go charging at the clitoris like a bull at a gate"
If you're doing well, maybe Capt. Kirk saying "Warp factor 9, give her everything you've got!"
Yeah... I'm so there...*snort
9. guate6 - February 9, 2008 3:34 AM
Damn luddites: no proofing this time? "don't [know] about..." perhaps? Anyway...so I don't get it...females usually moan, and I enjoy their moaning...no real need for one of these.
10. aaron - February 10, 2008 5:39 AM
what's the deal with the censoring? it looks like a windsock. i can't imagine anyone being scandalized by that drawing.
11. SlowMonkey - February 10, 2008 8:07 AM
The practical application of this is something similar to canned laughter.
#5 You are sexy smoking hot
12. Tephlon - February 11, 2008 4:43 AM
No jokes about short songs and epic operas?
13. boredom - February 11, 2008 8:10 AM
ok 12 I'll bite: "This is the clit that doesn't end, yes it goes on and on my friend. Some people started fucking it not knowing what it was and they'll continue fucking it forever just because this is the clit that doesn't end...." you get the point
14. HoldOn - February 11, 2008 3:27 PM
One more second hun I'm uploading!