Patent 5163447: The Musical Prophylactic

Patent 5163447 describes a "force-sensitive, sound-playing condom." The safety device features "a chip-controlled piezoelectric sound transducer (18) which plays a melody or voiced message when during intercourse the contacts of the sound-playing unit are closed and the transducer is activated." The inventor, Paul Lyons, actually sent me a few samples in time for Valentine's last year, but the results proved disastrous. Apparently the Star Wars theme didn't make my girlfriend as amorous as it made me. Neither did the Darth Vader mask I insisted she wear.
The uncensored picture after the jump.

Great Invention Idea? A Musical Condom [inventorspot]
Thanks to Ben Hurr, who always makes beautiful music with the ladies, for the tip
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isplay: inline;"> Seen here looking like your wiener's worst DO NOT WANT nightmare, a scientist holds a petri dish containing a new strain of gonorrhea-causing bacteria that's antibiotic resistant. What the -- stop being so cavalier with that shit and put some f***ing gloves o... / Continue →
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This is allegedly a Darth Vader condom from France. It looks like a Photoshop job but it's cute regardless because the message reads, "I will not be your father!" At least that's supposedly what it says, I don't speak French. It could read, "We poked a bunch of holes in the ... / Continue →
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We've already heard the Imperial March played on an old floppy disk and a Tesla coil, so why not a hard drive? Dum Dum Dum, Dum-te-Dum, Dum-te-Dum. It's like you're really there! You know, in outerspace. Look, there's Darth Vader! Ackkk -- he's force-choking me, quick, som... / Continue →

