I've always wanted the Wallyworld moose mugs from National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation, but didn't know they existed until now. Each one is mouth-blown and hand shaped, so they're expensive. $90 expensive to be exact, and you have to buy at least two ($180!). Upset with the price, I did a little investigative reporting and found plastic ones that run $40 for two. But those don't look as authentic as the glass ones. In fact they look like shit. So nevermind. Now if any of you want to come over and watch the movie with me tonight, you're more than welcome. As long as you're a woman. With boobs and everything. And by 'everything' I mean please don't have a penis like my last girlfriend. At least not one bigger than mine.
One of my favorite quotes from the movie below, to get you all excited.
Hey. If any of you are looking for any last-minute gift ideas for me, I have one. I'd like Frank Shirley, my boss, right here tonight. I want him brought from his happy holiday slumber over there on Melody Lane with all the other rich people and I want him brought right here, with a big ribbon on his head, and I want to look him straight in the eye and I want to tell him what a cheap, lying, no-good, rotten, four-flushing, low-life, snake-licking, dirt-eating, inbred, overstuffed, ignorant, blood-sucking, dog-kissing, brainless, dickless, hopeless, heartless, fat-ass, bug-eyed, stiff-legged, spotty-lipped, worm-headed sack of monkey shit he is! Hallelujah, holy shit! Where's the Tylenol?