Oct 19 2007 Bath Time Is Fun With A Remote Rubber Duck
Oh man I can't wait to take a bath later this month -- Play.com is releasing a sweet remote-controlled rubber duck on the 28th. They go for about $26, and take 6 AA batteries (2 for the controller, 4 for the duck charger). Five minutes of charging yields 15 minutes of fun. Just be careful that little propeller doesn't nick your submarine. Both controller and duck are waterproof. This thing really makes me wish I was growing up today instead of the 80's. My parents didn't give me anything fun to do in the bath. The only toy I ever got to play with in the tub was a turd, and I had to make that shit myself.
Have a great weekend everyone.
Remote-Control Rubber Duck [neatorama]
Oct 19 2007 New Rubik's Sucks, I Want A Fentix Cube
Andrew Fentem has developed the Fentix cube, which is everything the stupid Rubik's Revolution wishes it could be, and more. Each side is a multi-touchscreen, and the system also packs "a 3D system of accelerometers for gesture sensing a la Wii." All sorts of games have been developed, and I want one yesterday. They go on sale at London's Kinetica Museum soon. Someone please buy me one. I've never played with a box before, and all my friends say it's the cat's meow.
A short video of the unit in action after the jump.
Continue Reading " New Rubik's Sucks, I Want A Fentix Cube "
Oct 19 2007 Scooter Desk Is A Desk With Wheels!
Oh happy day! The Scooter Desk, from Utilia Design, is one of the awesomest desks ever. It combines a desk, with, get this, an f'ing scooter! So you can race around the office like never before. Now I prefer a knees in the chair and legs extended off the back stance when office racing, but I'm willing to give this a go. This will be more like an adult tricycle race. I don't need to go so fast anyways. The last time I raced I plowed into an unsuspecting secretary as she was exiting the restroom near turn two. It's not fair I have to pay the hospital bill. She was old and that hip was about to go anyways.
Oct 19 2007 New Vampire 2 Wingsuit For Skydiving
It's a bird! It's a plane! No, it's just some dildo in a Vampire 2 Wingsuit from Phoenix-Fly. The suit was designed to slow your free-fall from 111-139 mph to 37-59 mph thanks to the lift created -- allowing you to fly around and enjoy the view longer. It costs $1,250. Now I've been jumping out of planes for awhile now, and I've never worn one of these. They're lacking in style. And I'm all about jumping in style. Which is why I sport a Superman cape. I'm practically the Man of Steel. Sure I'm lacking the superpowers, good looks, and pretty much everything else, but I've got the cape. And the cape, my friends, is a good start.
A picture of a scary looking man who has clearly shit the suit and a video after the jump.
UPDATE: Another video added (thanks Skroonk) that shows some idiot in one of these things trying to touch a mountain while flying around.
Oct 19 2007 Chairs Change Color Based On Your Attire
An art exhibit by Moritz Waldemeyer entitled 'By Royal Appointment' features these chairs, which change the color aura around them to reflect the hue of your clothing. Go to Gallery Libby Sellers in South Kensington, London if you want to give them a go. Ol' Moritz suggests, "Wear something bright, this works particularly well." Which indicates to me they don't work particularly well. I gave them a go, and they had a difficult time accurately reproducing the pale eggshell that is my birthday suit. To be truthful it's all kind of a blur though. One minute I'm stripping down and taking a seat, and the next I'm being tazed and kicked a lot. F'ing security.
Designer chair reflects the color of your attire [newlaunches]
Oct 19 2007 Dog Rescue Jacket For Earthquake Victims
Well look at this dapper little bastard. He's looking mighty handsome today isn't he? That's because he's sporting the new Canine Earthquake Rescue Jacket. The idea is that this hotdog shaped animal will wiggle his way through debris to you if you happen to be trapped in your bathtub after your house falls in around you. The pack contains emergency supplies and food, to keep you alive until you're freed. The thing costs $434, which seems a little steep for a vinyl fanny-pack and hood. I just hope that have that little guy trained. Because if he's anything like my dog then no one is getting rescued. He'd tear open the pack, eat the food and supplies, then proceed to lick his genitals for awhile before falling asleep.
Canine earthquake rescue jacket [core77]
Oct 19 2007 Tag Your Living Room With The Graffiti Sofa
Designer Teruhiro Yanagihara has introduced the 'Grafitti Sofa', which you can mark with your fingers to design. Whatever you scratch in will remain until the sofa is ironed. Now call me crazy, but I could have sworn these were introduced, oh I don't know, forever ago. I've been scratching sofas for years. Ah yes, it seems like just yesterday I was scratching "I banged your girlfriend right here" into a friend's couch. Oh wait, that was yesterday. Hold on, doorbell. Oh Jesus, it's my friend. It looks like he has a gun.
Leave Your Mark [yankodesign]
Oct 19 2007 Do It Yourself Wooden Keyboard Available
HACOA has announced their do it yourself wooden keyboard is shipping, and at a measly $300. It comes with everything you see in the picture, including the little saw so you can get the keys apart. For $300 you'd think they'd already be separated, but I guess you're really paying for that DIY experience. If you're a cheap bastard you can just glue Scrabble tiles to the letters of an existing board. Or if you're shopping for something even more exotic, I'm selling DIY stone keyboards. It’s an old keyboard with the keys ripped off, some glue, and a chisel. Kits start at $250. You provide the rock.
One more after the jump.
Continue Reading " Do It Yourself Wooden Keyboard Available "
Oct 18 2007 Battle-Rig Pro Gaming Desk Has A Door
The Battle-Rig Pro gaming station is a glorified desk. That looks like it's in the process of being eaten by a red Pacman. Let's see here: A couple cabinets, a monitor shelf, a chair. Hmm. Not too much going on that my desk doesn't have, except maybe the integrated surround sound capabilities. Oh, and the little door. A desk with a door is sweet. I'm starting to like it. If you're masturbating behind a door, no one can see you. Even if it's your girlfriend and she's screaming at you and punching you in the head for watching anime porn. It's like she's not really there. Which she actually won't be for long if she catches you masturbating to anime. She'll find someone who isn't sick in the head.
Battle-Rig Pro for gamers [ubergizmo]
Oct 18 2007 Cell Phone Widget Detects Ghosts
I'm a tough guy, and I'm afraid of very few things, but I am afraid of a cat sleeping on my face at night and suffocating me. And ghosts. Ghosts are scary as hell. Well now I can get a cell phone strap ($17) that alerts me when it detects magnetic field alterations or body temperature fluctuations. Unfortunately it alerts you with different colored light patterns and ghost noises, which will make me shit my pants. If it does go off though at least it's attached to my... WHO YOU GONNA CALL? Ghostbusters! Or, some a-hole with a laser cleaning backpack. Whichever is cheaper.
Ghost detector cell phone strap [tokyomango]
Oct 18 2007 Artificial Tornado In Mercedes Benz Museum
The Guinnes Book of Records verified that the artificial tornado in Germany's Mercedes Benz Museum is the world's largest man-made twister. It's 34.43 meters (~113 feet) tall, and contains approximately 28 tons of air. It takes 144 jets about seven minutes to produce. It was created to suck smoke out of the building and save lives should a fire start. In the picture, carbon dioxide is being sprayed into the bottom of the tornado to make it visible. It's awesome, and I'm thinking about modifying my bathroom exhaust fan to produce something similar. I don't really understand the science behind it or anything, but I'm pretty handy with power tools. Okay, so I'm not very good with power tools. I can swing a hammer. Fine, I'm lying. I can wield a screwdriver with the best of them though. The vodka and orange juice version at least.
A bigger version of the picture after the jump.
Continue Reading " Artificial Tornado In Mercedes Benz Museum "
Oct 18 2007 No-Touch Faucet Is Better Than Not Washing
If there's one thing I hate, it's touching things. Things are gross and covered with germs. Well thanks to the Miscea Sensor Activated Faucet, there's one less thing you have to touch in the world -- sink knobs. You turn the water on by waving your hand, and can increase/decrease the temperature or dispense soap with similar motions. Sure it's a good idea, but not as good as mine. It's called not washing. Sure you just had your penis in your hand, but that's okay -- it's your penis. If it was the guy's next to you, well, that's a whole different thing. You should probably wash then.
No-touch, five-feature sink faucet [core77]
Oct 18 2007 Round LCD Screens Designed For Vehicles
After years of development, Toshiba just unveiled their new circular LCD panels. They're approximately 2.5-inches in diameter, sport a 240 x 240 resolution (on the longest lines) and 600:1 contrast ratio. Toshiba believes they'll be utilized for instrument panels in vehicles, along with other mobile devices. "Why?" you ask. "Why not?" Toshiba replies. It looks like a paperweight superimposed on a makeup mirror if you ask me. Not that I know what a makeup mirror is, because I'm all man. I don't wear makeup, I rub my face in pig's blood and eat raw meat. *grunt, grunt* Okay, I'm gay.
Toshiba's new circular LCDs: because your eyes are round [engadget]
Oct 18 2007 Braille Tattoos, So The Blind Can Read You
The Braille Tattoo was designed by Klara Jirkova. It looks like a skin disease. They're steel, titanium, or medical plastic "bumps" that are implanted under the skin. So the blind can read them via touch. I'm not really too sure what to say except it seems gross as hell. But I'm not blind. Sometimes I wish I was though, because it turns out I'm dating the world's ugliest woman. Even my dog won't go near her -- and he's blind. I bet he smells the ugly.
Tattoos for the Blind [neatorama]
Oct 18 2007 Lunchbox Has Lots Of Screen Real Estate
Acme, a company best known for selling a stupid coyote products that almost always kill him, unveiled a 3-LCD foldout "laptop" at Taiwan's Taitronics Autumn 2007 show. Each screen is 17", providing sufficient real estate for whatever your needs. It goes on sale next year, but no word on price. Just be careful trying to use this thing as a laptop -- it will probably crush your privates if you set it on your lap. I'd still try though. Who needs privates anyways when you can watch massive amounts at porno at once. Wait a minute.
Portable Computer Has Three 17-Inch LCDs [therawfeed]
Oct 17 2007 The Impact Jacket Protects Ya' Neck
The Impact jacket helps protect your delicate head and neck in case you get into a motorcycle accident. It's a padded jacket that features an airbag that deploys if you're launched from your bike. It works via a lanyard that you attach to the frame. If the lanyard is pulled with greater than 25-35 lbs of force, a CO2 cartridge deploys the bag while you're flying through the air/sliding on the pavement. Apparently it works well, because some dude in Maryland flew over 100 ft in excess of 140 mph and walked away with only minor injuries. I'm getting one for sure, and I only ride a bicycle. Ever since the training wheels came off, I've had a hard time controlling that thing.
Wearable airbags for motorcyclists [core77]
Oct 17 2007 Flip Mr. P's Nose Sized Unit To Turn Him On
Mr. P is a special lamp. You have to flip his penis to turn him on. When you do his head lights up in embarrassment -- because his dangle-down in so small! He costs $110, and comes with a removable shade in case you want to spare him the shame. Truthfully, I don't think he is ashamed. Look at his stance -- does that look like the posture of someone who is embarrassed with their dong? I think not! Oh wait, he's frowning. That poor small penised bastard. He should be ashamed.
The Mr P. Lamp makes you laugh when you turn it (him) on [shinyshiny]
Oct 17 2007 Bioloid Robot Transformers Are Awesome
Sure there are a lot of things out there calling themselves Transformers but don't do any transforming. Well this guy actually does do some transforming. It's built from a Bioloid Humanoid Robotics Set (which start around $900), and looks pretty freaking awesome. The little guy even has video camera eyes and can dance. But not as good as me. I can really cut a rug. Just ask any of my numerous girlfriends at Sunnyside Assisted Living Retirement Home. They know what's up.
Follow the link for another one from the same guy.
Check this one out too [thanks to Raul the Handsome for the tip]
Oct 17 2007 Umbrella Water Gun Wets The Unsuspecting
The Umbrella Water Gun, from Alexy Woolley Design, is what's created when an umbrella gets drunk one night and goes home with a hussy of a water gun. The unit collects water in the concave top, which travels down into the water gun handle -- so you never run out of ammo as long as it's raining! Brilliant. Just add some dye or food coloring to the reservoir to really piss people off. Just make sure you're wearing running shoes, because if I get sprayed I'll take that umbrella and ram it so far up your ass you'll die of dehydration.
One more after the jump of people who don't understand when to use an umbrella.
Continue Reading " Umbrella Water Gun Wets The Unsuspecting "
Oct 17 2007 Keyboard Has Lots Of Buttons, I Like Buttons
The Terpstra MIDI keyboard has 280 keys, which is a lot. You can set each key to whatever the hell you want, and all are velocity sensitive. The keys can be removed and swapped as well, in case the factory default pattern just doesn't do it for you. The unit has jacks for a foot switch, volume pedal, and MIDI in/out. I couldn't find a price, but it's probably expensive. I need one though because I'm a musical prodigy. My specialty is the Jaws theme. I've almost got that one down pat.
Terpstra MIDI Keyboard - Needs More Keys [ohgizmo]
Oct 17 2007 Hyundai Drops Cell Phone Camera Watch
Hyundai, a company best known for their line of affordable personal transportation machines, is releasing the W-100, a cell phone watch with 1.3 megapixel camera. It comes complete with touch-screen and stylus, Bluetooth connectivity, MicroSD card, and will play MP3s. An English version will be made, but no word on pricing yet. Now I'm all about a cell phone watch, but I don't know about a Hyundai cell phone watch. Because I used to have a Hyundai, and the damn thing kept driving itself into parked cars. Not only that, but the bastard was too cheap to ever leave a note.
Three more pictures after the cut.
Oct 17 2007 Samsung 1,152 Person Commercial
If you haven't seen this already it's a video made in South Korea for Samsung featuring 1,152 people coordinating their moves to make images (like a monster LCD screen). They're not using cards, but clothes with different colors to make the changes. It's pretty mesmerizing, particularly if you've been doing drugs. In addition, at 1:05 in the video a cameraman almost gets trampled on the left side of the screen. Sweet. I particularly like the dancer they make at the 3:00 mark -- I think I saw her muff.
Youtube [thanks to ultra-cool tz for the tip]
Oct 16 2007 USB Fridge/Heater Cools/Heats Beer At Work
The USB Fridge and Heater, from USBGeek takes 5 minutes to cool a beverage to 54°F or heat one to 116°F from a starting temperature of 82°F. They cost $34. You know I love all things USB, so I've already got one on order. Last month I got busted for having beer in the mini-fridge in my cubicle, so I've had to be real stealthy in order to get drunk at work. This thing will work perfect. I'll hide my beer/liquor in a filing cabinet, and then pop it in the USB cooler as needed. Sure 54°F isn't exactly ice cold, but I drank a whole fifth of Jack Daniels once on a nature hike after it spent 2 hours soaking up the heat of my trunk. I'm a man damnit.
Product Site [usbgeek]
Oct 16 2007 Man Trappped In Box Game Looks Promising
Levelhead, a game being developed by digital artist Julian Oliver, looks pretty neat. The basis of the game is a marked cube, a digital video camera, and some custom software. Basically you move the cube, the camera picks up the angular changes you make, and you try to lead the little man to the exit. It's sort of similar to the Playstation's Eye technology. Could be fun. Sort of like Lemmings, except you can't nuke the little bastard when shit hits the fan.
Explanatory video after the jump.
UPDATE: You can only see the rooms and man if you're watching through the monitor. The cube is just a box marked in a way so the camera can recognize which way you have it turned.
Continue Reading " Man Trappped In Box Game Looks Promising "
Oct 16 2007 Space Money Looks Like Breast Implants
The Quasi Universal Intergalactic Denomination, or Quid for short, is the new currency designed for outer space. They have no sharp edges and are made from the same polymer as non-stick pans -- to ensure no damage to space tourists or ships. Currently, one quid is worth about $12.50, which is probably enough for an intergalactic gumball. A spaceball. But if you don't want to pay that much I'll sell you a hardened breast implant with a juju fruit inside for half the price. Cheap and edible. Win-win baby.
New currency for space travellers [bbc news]
Oct 16 2007 SwissMiniGun Is Tiny, Will Put Out Your Eye
The SwissMiniGun is the world's smallest functional revolver. It's only 2.16 inches long, making it slightly larger than my gun, and shoots bullets that are only 0.35 inches. What better way to acclimate your infant to beautiful weaponry than this little thing? I mean, it's not like it could kill anybody. It's far too cute for that. It would be fun to substitute this puppy in your next game of Clue though. It was Colonel Mustard in the library with the "What bitch!" *pop pop*
Another picture and a video after the jump.
Continue Reading " SwissMiniGun Is Tiny, Will Put Out Your Eye "
Oct 16 2007 Nissan Concept Van Doubles As Pedo-Mobile
Nissan unveiled another concept vehicle ready for the 2007 Tokyo Motor show. It's called the NV200, which is a really shitty name for a van that's designed for underwater photographers/soccer moms. Why not the Scuba-van or Marine-machine? Its got all the accoutrements for photographers, including an editing workstation, storage for diving gear, etc. Jesus, Nissan, what the hell is wrong with you? Last time I checked, there weren't exactly a shit-ton of underwater photographers in the world looking for new wheels. This isn't going to make any money. What the world needs is a masturbation-station wagon -- then you've got something.
Nissan to Unveil 2007 Mobile Office Concept [bornrich]
Oct 16 2007 New Rubik's Cube Is Digital, I Miss Analog
Well apparently the analog version of the Rubik's cube just wasn't enough for the greedy company (it only sold a paltry 300 million units), so here comes the Rubik's Revolution! No really, that's what it's called. The segments don't move at all anymore, instead you can play 6 different games with awesome titles like Cube Catcher and Pattern Panic. They all revolve around pushing the glowing button in the middle of each side. The unit costs $20. I think I'll stick to the original analog version. You know, I once solved it in under a minute. Using my penis.
Rubik's Revolution [ohgizmo]
Oct 16 2007 Darth Vader Samurai Suit Is Awesome, Small
I wish I had posted this yesterday to complete the Star Wars trifecta, but it didn’t happen (Ben sent the tip overnight). Anyways, the Yoshitoku Company has a "Samurai Vader" suit of armor -- complete with traditional bow and sword. The majority of the craftsmen that built the suit are over 70 years old, so props to the geriatric crowd. The helmet and weapons will set you back $1,500, and the whole suit goes for $5,200. Oh, the sad part -- it's only 1/4 scale, so you can't wear it unless you're really small. That's why I'm getting it for my son. Who I'll hopefully produce when my girlfriend comes home on her lunch break.
Darth Vader Samurai Armor - The Dark Side Never Looked So Good [albotas, big thanks to Ben for the tip]
Oct 15 2007 Sky Puter Case Mod Provides Good Airflow
The Sky Puter is one of the sweetest case mods (or lack thereof) I've seen in a long time. Sure there have been some pretty sweet cases in the past, but I think it's safe to say this one takes the cake. All pieces of the computer are suspended from cat5 or cat3 cable. Add a 20-inch box fan and your piece will be running at near sub-zero temperatures. Did I mention I actually think it looks like crap? I actually think it looks like crap. Novel concept though. I'll give it that. I like the coat hangers and speaker.
A couple more after the jump.
Continue Reading " Sky Puter Case Mod Provides Good Airflow "
Oct 15 2007 Rain Collector Collects Rain, Drowns Plants
The reLEAF Rain Collector is a rain collector for potted plants. Created by Swiss design team FULGURO, it's made of thermo lacquered aluminum and shaped to resemble a leaf. Water is funneled down the stem of the unit straight to the roots of your plant. It looks horrible and kind of detracts from the plant doesn't it? If you're too lazy to water your plants, you shouldn't have any. Children either. Definitely no children.
reLEAF Rain Collector [ohgizmo]
Oct 15 2007 Google Vanity Ring Is A Status Symbol
The Vanity Ring, a project by Markus Kison, is an update of the ring as a status symbol. Basically it keeps a running tab on the number of Google hits your name gets. You personalize the ring using some custom software, and every night you plug the little sucker into its docking station and it updates your hit count. Great idea, if you're famous and vain as hell. But if you're anything like me, the counter will never pass the number you do yourself unless you change your name to "nude pictures", "free porn", or "hot singles ready to have sex in my area".
A Google Ring on your finger [core77]
Oct 15 2007 Life Size Princess Leia Sex Toy Coming Soon
Did someone say more Star Wars? Well you got it! Introducing the Star Wars Animated Life Size Princess Leia Monument. She stands around 5 feet tall, has a blaster, and looks hot as hell. Check out those cans! Honk honk! They say she's animated, but I couldn't find any info on what actually moves. Maybe her head swivels. She's limited edition, but only costs $800. What a steal. Did I mention she comes with some of the sweetest sweater yams I've ever set eyes on? Well she does! Now I'm not saying I'm going to buy one and have sex with it, but when I do buy one and have sex with it I hope it's gentler on my privates than the life size Terminator I got last year.
Star Wars Animated Life Size Princess Leia Monument stands tall [newlaunches]
Oct 15 2007 Boba Fett The Brownie Hunter Stores Cookies
The Boba Fett Ceramic Cookie Jar is available from the Starwarsshop and costs $50. He stands about 12 inches tall and can hold snicker-doodles, oatmeal raisin cookies, brownies, peanut butter cookies, and many more delicious treats.
StarWarsShop has only a handful of this exquisite ceramic cookie jar bust left. This robust sculpture, painted to match Fett’s penchant for close scrapes, features a lifting helmet top that opens to reveal the mercenary’s sweeter side.
They also have an R2-D2 model ($45) as well as a Special Ops Clone Trooper ($50). Now don't get me wrong, I love cookies as much as anyone else -- but I can't really see myself replacing my memory of Boba Fett: Intrepid Bounty Hunter with Boba Fett: Delicious Cookie Receptacle. It's just wrong.
One more of the other two models after the jump.
Continue Reading " Boba Fett The Brownie Hunter Stores Cookies "
Oct 15 2007 Hand Warmer Keeps You Toasty Without Fire
The Zippo Hand Warmer is a stylish hand warmer in that classic Zippo style. It costs $30, and can warm up to 24 hours with only 0.4 oz of fuel. Not only that, but the unit uses a platinum-catalyzed glass fiber burner, which means no actual flame to set your pants on fire. I think it's awesome, and need one for those nights I'm sent to sleep in the doghouse for mumbling another woman's name in my sleep and making humping gestures.
Warm Hands Are Happy Hands [electroplankton]
Oct 15 2007 Remote Is Fragile, Will Break & Make You Sad
The Ceramic Remote Control, from designer Yuta Watanabe, is, you guessed it -- fragile! The idea is that since you can't just throw it down on the floor or table with gusto, that it will never get lost. You'll always set it down somewhere safe and easy to find. Interesting concept, but I'm sticking to my remote, which is a six foot pole with a chicken wing taped to the end. It never gets lost, and if I accidentally drop it over the side of the bed, the chicken wing attracts the dog, who picks it up for me. Not to brag, but it did win the "most delicious remote" award at a recent contest.
Ceramic Remote Control [yankodesign]
Oct 15 2007 Brush & Rinse Toothbrush Redirects Water
The Brush & Rinse toothbrush, designed by Scott Amron, redirects water from a faucet to your lips for easy rinsing. The back of the head is shaped to direct water "into a fluid parabola as perfect as the St. Louis Arch." They cost $3, or you can get 1 of 27 original working prototypes for a paltry $1,750. I had a college professor a few years back that really could have used one of these. The whole brushing thing was just too much of a hassle for her. Maybe this would have made it easier. She'd get up in your face if you asked a question and nearly knock you out with her breath. It was always like she'd just finished eating a bag of shit.