Jun 7 2007The Shade Blade
If you want to be the coolest person EVER, the Shade Blade is for you.
It possesses far reaching impact potential on consumers by providing a solar powered digital arsenal of modular components. The ShadeBlade visor component is constructed of extremely flexible polyester encapsulated photovoltaic modules laminated with an arsenal of thin film rechargeable Li-batteries and circuit board assembly capable of receiving plug and play chips such as: AM/FM radio, marine band radio, walkie talkies, cellular communication and vision transmission technology.
If you really want to complete the ensemble, just put on a fanny pack and some pocket protectors and you'll be good to go. And hike your pants up as high as possible. Oh, man, the Fonz is gonna be so jealous.
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Reader Comments
1. FIRST - June 7, 2007 12:32 PM
FIRST FIRST FIRST FIRST FIRST FIRST FIRST FIRST FIRST FIRST FIRST FIRST FIRST FIRST FIRST FIRST FIRST FIRST FIRST FIRST FIRST
2. Brownian - June 7, 2007 12:33 PM
Why are these needed? Is golf really that strenuous? I mean, if these could warn you that your wife is about to catch you hitting on the drink cart girl (http://www.betheball.com/drink_cart_girls.htm) they'd be worth it, but they probably don't, so you'll just have to keep relying on Ted, the douche from payroll who likes to style himself as your 'wingman', you sleazy fuck.
3. Joe Mamma - June 7, 2007 12:33 PM
That speeling bee kid is going to be the spokesman for it too.
4. vÅnman - June 7, 2007 1:43 PM
If these have stereoscopic ports, it is cool. If not, fuck you. Judging by both te wording i.e. ""capable" of receiving plug and play chips" and the fact that the picture is a solid model most likely designed with UGS software, this is only an idea. An idea with no functioning prototype. You would have to add anything good to it, and who wants an nVidia video card and souldblaster audio card strapped to their hat.
5. Amy - June 7, 2007 2:25 PM
That's hot. I'd totally jump whoever wears these. I also have a tattoo on my hip that reads "Mrs. Screech"
6. Joel Rifkin - June 7, 2007 4:32 PM
If you're planning on crash landing on a remote Pacific island, like the people on "Lost", then these would be perfect.
7. Danny - June 8, 2007 12:06 AM
I'm willing to bet that something like this comes out on South Park for Cartman to fawn over, buy/steal/smuggle, and otherwise get owned for it in some comical way that involves a satellite and his ass.
Other than that, I would wear one of these, yeah. And reach up and hold my fingertips against that ear-bud every now and then and stop and -stare- at some random passerby, even the children.
A little childhood trauma builds character.
I mean, look at me, the robot-men that wanted to assimilate me when I was eight made me become some cruel, cold-hearted beast. Which is why I'll walk by myself on the beach on the nights of a full moon and gaze hopefully skywards, hoping some geeky device will score me a gaggle of women-friends with whom to converse.
8. vanman - June 8, 2007 1:24 AM
If you ever wondered what Hunter Thompson would wear if he was reanimated and converted to cyborg, this may be it. Your Welcome.