May 29 2007The Most Secure Bicycle Ever

secure-bike.jpg

This guy could totally fit at least three more locks on there. Unless, you know, he's okay not having the most secure bicycle ever. And he should maybe think about gluing a shark to the seat.

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You can never be safe.

His key chain for that must look like a Janitor's key chain. Or he just carries around a bic pen. That can open those krypto locks too.

All that work, just for a sorry ass ten-speed. Look, dude, nobody wants your damn schwinn. It's now a target for theft just for the heck of it though.

I just hire Steven Segal to stand next to my bike, and you thought he got kicked out of the movie business, nope, he was too busy with his new job.

Cool. That's an art piece 5 blocks from my house. All the locks are welded together.

Err, except that most of the locks aren't attached to anything. I assume this is one of those modern attempts at "art"...

Look at the deflated tires, the bike has been sitting there awhile.

this is ART you schmucks!!

if you didnt realize that you're incapable of life..

go end yourself.

thanks.

I wonder how long it would take to get all of those locks off the bike? hmmm...

But I digress.

That. Is. Amazing.
If it was a regular damn bike, I'd leave it alone.
But now Imma go steal it just 'cause it's that awesome.

^...exactly. Kinda like how I steal the pens from the bank just because they have that chainy thingy on it. Or how in junior high I rolled a doobie out of a "Say no to drugs" napkin.

They have say no to drugs napkins?
Damn. I need one of those.
It's the ultimate irony.

They did for a week in junior high. And they thought it alone would keep the school clean. Kinda like they think those locks alone would keep that bike stationary. If anything, they would drive someone to steal it. Steal their art from them. Hope it's not valuable.

[...[ Lo he encontrado en geekologie y la verdad que es sorprendente. Imaginad el tiempo que habrĂ¡ gastado el propietario en poner todos los candados, y cada uno con una llave diferente. Para llevar el llavero se necesita un saco. [..]

[...] Lo he encontrado en geekologie y la verdad que es sorprendente. Imaginad el tiempo que habrĂ¡ gastado el propietario en poner todos los candados, y cada uno con una llave diferente. Para llevar el llavero se necesita un saco. [...]

This is a "sculpture" outside of the Mountain Equipment Coop in Vancouver BC, where it is well known, if you don't lock your bike, it is stolen. I know, I steal all the bikes.

z0mg photoshop roflcopter!

Someone was bound to say it. I went ahead and tossed it out there.

That's an awful lot of money spent on locks. It would've been better spent on whores.

Yes, I use modern attempts at art involving numerous locking devices in order to keep people from stealing bikes, too.

However...

Owner of the red Harley Davidson..'Ruff'...the Hell's Angel guy thingy..
Please tell your friends to stop gang-banging my mom.
I'll get the locks off when I have time! I'm busy making lock-porn.
..get..the locks off...ahahaha. Lock porn. Great. Laugh you bastard.

I knew someone in college who once did something similar. He would steal the cheap combination locks from bikes (the ones you could open in a few seconds) and when he had about 20 of them, he would hang them all on a random bike. Sure was a WTF moment for the owner!

I live in Canada, BC.

I've seen this peice outside Mountain CO-OP. Is this the same one?
Or was this sculpture mass produced.

i really dont see how this counts as art...

You can never be too safe now a days.

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