April 12, 2006

moon_probe.jpg NASA is taking time off from making orthopedic space mattresses to finally do some real work: launching a missile into the moon. Okay, maybe not a missile missile, but a probe. Probes are like peaceful missiles. In an attempt to determine the possibility of hidden ice on the moon, NASA will fire the probe at the moon's surface, excavating a hole the size of a football field and creating a violent explosion that will be visible on Earth through a telescope. The probe's mother ship will fly through the resulting plume of debris to take samples and readings. If I had known that NASA was all about collisions and violent explosions, I would have focused on getting a job with them rather than shooting for manager at Burger King. I wonder if it's too late.

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eye_massager.jpg Wired has compiled a list of weirdest USB gadgets. The list includes the standard favorites like hand warmers, toothbrushes, and novelty aquariums, as well as adding some lesser-known entries like electric blankets, humidifiers, and the inappropriately corded puppy cam. Pictured is the USB eye massager, which provides "comfort for the weary-eyed computer user." I think we can all agree that nothing is more comfortable than jamming a vibrating plastic finger into your eye. One glaring absence from the list is Dada's MP3-playing shoe. What's wrong Wired? Afraid of a little class and style?

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virtual_keyboard.jpg ThinkGeek is now selling the fabled bluetooth laser virtual keyboard for $179.99. The 3.5 inch gadget projects a laser keyboard on any flat surface, providing a full qwerty keyboard for your cell phone or PDA. When you type on the keyboard, the device emits simulated click sounds, providing much needed feedback since you are typing on keys of light. How far off is a giant laser keyboard projected onto the floor? I'm sure people would love to recreate that piano scene in Big whenever they attempt to stomp out yet another tedious corporate email.

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Ron Mueck is an Australian hyper-realist sculptor who makes sculptures that faithfully reproduce minute details of the human body, but plays with scale to make them visually jarring. Check out this gallery in the Washington Post and try not to be amazed. It's what would happen if Michelangelo and Jim Henson each took a hit of acid and then joined forces. And by 'joined forces' I mean made sweet tender love to each other. Because that's how sculptures are made, my friend. Through the magic of sexual intercourse.

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GamePro has compiled a list of what they feel are the most controversial video game ads of all time. The list is pretty short and not all that shocking though, making me wonder just how much research they put into this thing. I'm sure the ad for Tetris featuring me having sex with a cow was pretty controversial. And yet, no cow sex ad to be seen. What's the deal, GamePro?

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Organizers of the annual ROBO-ONE robot battles in Japan have announced plans to hold a robot fight in space by 2010. The competition, which is designed to increase the progress of killer space robot technology, will take place near a special satellite and consist of grappling matches between two biped robots. The robots must be no larger than 4 inches, and the whole competition depends on unsecured international approval, but I'm excited that there will finally be robots fighting in space. Unless the competition is just a front for a plan to steal service from the HBO satellite, which has been the secret goal of every space exploration mission since 1963.

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