April 14, 2006

life_watch.jpg Finally, someone has designed a product that never lets you forget death's cold grip constantly firming on your wrist. A patent was filed in 1991 for the "Life Expectancy Watch," which monitors and displays the "approximate time remaining in a lifespan of an individual" by decrementing years, days, hours, minutes, and seconds to your actuarially-determined death date. The watch also has the ability to shift the countdown as the individual ages. This would be a great way to evaluate choices in your daily life. Thinking about jumping the Snake River Canyon in a rocket-powered skycycle? Your watch says you won't die until 2012, so I say go for it.

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12_monitors.jpg

Apparently someone named "Crazy Jon" decided to install twelve 30 inch monitors on a wall in his house. The monitors are powered by three networked computers with two 512MB video cards in each, producing a total resolution of 49,152,000 pixels. This project required additional support beams for the wall, an intricate series of 48 fans to keep the monitors cool, and three 1,000 watt power supplies. As to why Jon spent thousands of dollars on the setup, I'm sure it's to watch twelve Ernest movies at one time. No price is too high for that much Ernest.

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cell_phone_lcd.jpg South Korean company Iljin Display is working on miniscule LCD projectors that can be placed inside cell phones and digital cameras. The projectors will cast a seven inch, full color display onto walls, floors, and the backs of a large people on the bus. The technology for the projectors is currently as large as a pack of cigarettes, but the company aims to get it down to the size of a matchbox by the end of the year. Unfortunately, enlarging your contact list with a projector won't change the fact that you only have numbers for your mom and Dunkin Donuts. Also, it's been around a half an hour since you last talked to your mom, so you might want to give her a call.

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space_golf.jpg The Russian space agency is pressuring NASA to allow a cosmonaut to hit a golf ball from the international space station. A Canadian golf company has paid the Russian space agency and undisclosed amount of money to hit a special gold-plated golf ball into orbit, but they must get NASA's approval before the cosmonaut can tee off. NASA officials have stated that one of the biggest concerns is that the golf ball or the golf club will accidentally hit the space station, which was not designed to withstand golf-related attacks. "We are doing this for the sport of golf, not for the money" a Russian space agency representative said, immediately followed by "I will take off my pants right now for four dollars cash." Or I might have said that. I can't remember.

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spoon.jpg Connie Cheng and Leonardo Bonanni have created the Intelligent Spoon, a cooking concept that will force you to use a computer the next time you just want to make some damn pudding. The Intelligent Spoon is equipped with various sensors that calculate a dish's temperature, acidity, salinity, and viscosity. The readings from the spoon are sent over a cable to a computer that will calculate and display the results and offer cooking suggestions. Future plans for the intelligent spoon include adding a sensor that will estimate the number of times you'll ruin that spaghetti recipe before you give up and slap a hot pocket into the microwave.

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bionic_vision.jpg Cheri Robertson, a woman who lost both of her eyes in a car crash, received an experimental new surgery that restored some of her vision. The procedure inserts electrodes into the brain that interact with a camera placed on the person's glasses, allowing someone without eyes to become slightly more terrifying to children. The surgery is only for people who had vision at one point in their life, and at this stage Cheri can only see "two splashes" of light . Not without risk, the surgery's main concern is an infection where the port goes into the head. Although I can appreciate the courage involved in attempting such a surgery, I have to point out that a seeing eye dog has never produced an infection in someone's brain port.

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