Mitsubishi Electronic Research Laboratories is developing a new tabletop computer display that features a unique touch interface. Whenever someone touches the display, a very slight current travels through their body and into their chair, registering the exact position that they touched. Using this process, the display keeps track of who touches what and allows people to touch multiple things at once. This display seems like it would lend itself well to board games. Although, I guess I wouldn't be able to flip the board over when I start losing at Hungry Hungry Hippos. Which is pretty much every time I play. I hate those damn hippos so much.
Euro Spyshop is selling a suitcase that should liven up your morning commute, boring staff meetings, and family gatherings. The lackluster apearance of this suitcase hides two security features that are activated by an included keychain remote. For minor scuffles, the suitcase can emit a 170db alarm. If deafening your attacker doesn't subdue him/her, the other switch on the remote control will activate an 80,000 volt electric shock. Make sure that you are no longer holding the suitcase when you hit that switch, as it's a lot harder to defend yourself when you're unconscious and twitching on the ground.
European scientists have managed to combine living brain cells and silicon circuits, finally allowing me to add "electric brain monsters" to my list of reasonable fears. The Neurochip uses special proteins that bind to neurons and create successful channels for communication. Although this technology is in its early stages, the researchers are hoping to use it for treating neurological disorders, screening drugs, and creating "living computers." I think I speak for everyone when I say that I'm really looking forward to having a giant oozing mass of tissue on my desk right next to my monitor.
Chicago's Exotic Coach "limosuites" company has begun advertising their new LimoJet, a limousine made from a customized personal jet whose wings have been clipped. The LimoJet accommodates 16-18 passengers, and comes standard with 30" custom chrome wheels, 42" plasma television, 4 additional flat screen televisions, 4,500 Watt stereo, realistic jet sounds, and disco ball. The LimoJet should be available to rent in the next few months, although it is not known whether or not they have secured a "SOULPLN" vanity license plate.
Ipifini has introduced "programmable liquid container" technology that is sure to make us all pay $20 when we just want a damn bottle of Sprite. The technology consists of special buttons on the soda bottle that inject flavor, caffeine, and "paint" into the soda. Depending on the buttons that the consumer presses, the soda can take on one of many different types of flavor and colors. Completely unbiased co-inventor Glenn Wachler states, "providing choice at the point of consumption creates tremendous advantages for the consumers as well as the manufacturer." With advantages that tremendous, I hope they start selling the buttons separately. Just a few caffeine buttons placed directly on my arm and I'll finally be able to cut sleep completely out of my life.
Dub Wheels has released Pimpstar, a product that is aptly described as a "huge leap forward in the evolution of the wheel." The Pimpstar line incorporates full color LED lights and a microprocessor into each wheel of your car, allowing you to display images, text, graphics, logos, and photos on the wheels themselves. You can update the images while you drive, and since each wheel has its own microprocessor, you can display different images on each wheel. It's obivious. Four wheels. Four Golden Girls. What else can I say?
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