Nov 20 2009 NSFW NSFW: WTF DID I JUST WATCH?! SERIOUSLY, W.T.F. DID I JUST WATCH?!
WARNING: NSFW VIDEO IS NSFW
This is the highly, highly, HIGHLY NSFW music video for the Flair's 'Truckers Delight'. I can't even begin to describe to you how dirty I felt after watching it. Unless you've ever swam in pig shit and then showered in vomit afterward. In which case, Jesus, join another pool.
Thanks Smee and Kaerus, I'll split my therapist's bills between the two of you.
Nov 20 2009 They're All The Rage: On/Off Head Switches
Want to look like you're a cyborg or some shit? I couldn't imagine why (unless you want me to brain you with a crowbar), but if you do, just glue an on/off switch to the back of your head like Dominic Wilcox did. But, WARNING: your hats won't fit the same! Neat idea, Dominic, but this is exactly the kind of thing that'll get you killed if you roll with the crew that I do. THAT SAID, I JUST I JUST HOOKED MYSELF UP WITH A VOLUME KNOB. WHAT? OH SORRY -- SOMEBODY TURNED ME UP TO 11!!
Hit the jump for a picture of the installation process.
Continue Reading " They're All The Rage: On/Off Head Switches "
Nov 20 2009 Holy Grail? You Decide: A Bacon Chalice
I can't even imagine weaving bacon so tight as to not let liquid (well, molten cheese) through, but apparently somebody did. My hat oven mitts are off to you, bacon mug maker. Cause one time I tried weaving bacon and it didn't even make a solid placemat. It did, however, make a solid after-school snack. Kidding, I'm vegetarian. Did you feel that? That was your head imploding.
Bacon Beer Mug [thisisfreakingridiculous]
Thanks to Profound, mike469x, Dominican Joe, Freedom and KilgoreTrout XL, one of which is Kurt Vonnegut's plus-size alter-ego, the other three of which are fighting over who gets to eat the cup.
Nov 20 2009 For The Dapper Dog: Humunga Staches
The Humunga Stache is a $12 piece of molded rubber. One side's a ball, and the other is giant freaking mustache. So when your dog bites the ball, guess what happens! (Hint: you take pictures and post them Facebook with clever captions).
Add some low-cost laughs to your frequent frolics with Fido! This shiny black toy is a ball on one end, and a giant cartoon mustache on the other. Dogs naturally pick up the ball...which leaves the outrageously funny mustache sticking out! Dogs also love to hold the ball in their mouth, and shake the mustache back and forth!
Not a bad idea. Of course, my dog would just chew up the whole damn thing. You see, she's a bitch. And, based on those tits in the pic, so is Fido. Animal cruelty!
Product Site
via
Humunga Stache [likecool]
Thanks to Niki, whose bitch has a real mustache and moonlights as a carny.
Nov 20 2009 Whaaat?: Sand People Like Scooby Snacks?
In a mash-up of universes that's about to make my head explode, it turns out Tusken Raiders love Scooby Snacks. And speaking of which -- I'd like to see Scoob and the gang try pulling THAT dude's mask off. Ruh-roh is right -- you gonna die!
Sand People like Scooby Snacks [tk8247's deviantart]
Thanks to sham, who only tried Bantha fodder once and didn't like it.
Nov 20 2009 Wow, Video Game Religion -- Mass: We Pray
Mass We Pray is a video game to get that Holy Spirit all up in your system and have fun with the whole family at the same time. With fun interactive mini-games like 'Conduct the Choir' and 'Genuflecting', you're sure to make Jesus proud (who's ALWAYS watching, BTW). Looks fun, doesn't it? That said, this is viral advertising for Dante's Inferno dropping in February. But I want to see how many people didn't bother reading this far and think it's real and then make comments about it. Because you know there's gonna be some. Then they're gonna wish they could delete their comments but they won't be able to and we'll all laugh and call them names! Trust me, its WJWD.
Thanks to mensa, Nicole, MoD and daniel, who are praying all the theaters showing New Moon spontaneously combust.
Nov 20 2009 Creepy Robot Stares At You So You Exercise
How would you like this creepy little bastard staring at your ass when you're performing squats? Or maybe holding your feet while you do crunches? Or maybe you've got to be out of your got-damn mind!
Bandit is helping the University of Southern California Center for Robotics and Embedded Systems conduct a study on exercise training. 70 volunteers of all ages (including 20 people aged 60 or older living in retirement homes) will have either Bandit himself or Bandit on video as a trainer, and the researchers will try to figure out if the physical presence of the robot makes a difference.
That's right, they named him Bandit. As in, "Give me all your internal organs!" Listen, you want me to tell you whether a robot's presence helps you lose weight? It does -- and I'll prove it. SEND IN THE ROOMBA! *Eeeeeeeeeeeeek!* There, I feel four pounds lighter already. Oh, and I'm not cleaning that shit up either.
Video of the little jerkbag after the jump.
Continue Reading " Creepy Robot Stares At You So You Exercise "
Nov 20 2009 Takes All Kinds: Machete-Wielding Taco Thief
The latest in a string of taco-related violence, a masked marauder in Illinois held up another man at machete-point and demanded the poor chap's tacos. Admit it -- if you'd have had a machete you would have done the same thing!
Elgin Deputy Police Chief Jeff Swoboda says a local resident was walking back to his vehicle Sunday night after buying 16 tacos for $41 when a man wearing a black ski mask and a hooded sweat shirt ran up to him.
Swoboda says the masked man waved a machete and took the tacos, but nothing else. He then drove off in an older-model light green car.
Wait a minute -- $41 for 16 tacos? Those must be some good-ass tacos! Say, this gives me an idea. *rummaging through closet for ninja-sword* Ow, shit! Shit shit shit shit shit. Cut myself.
Machete-wielding man steals tacos [abcnews]
Thanks to Annie, who won't cut anyone for anything less than a burrito. *phew*
Nov 19 2009 About Time!: Improved Steering Wheel Desk
We saw another steering wheel desk here on Geekologie quite some time ago, but I think we can all agree this is a much improved model. First of all, you can write/type at a normal angle and not the angle of the actual wheel. As a matter of fact, I'm using one now, and I've got to admit: it's quite comfortable. Secondly, HOOOOOOLY SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT
Hit the jump for a bunch of other worthwhile product shots.
Continue Reading " About Time!: Improved Steering Wheel Desk "
Nov 19 2009 The Monsters That Didn't Make The Cut: New Star Trek's Deleted Gorn And Salt Vampire
Wonder what the Gorn and Salt Vampire that were supposed to appear in the new Star Trek's deleted Rura Penthe Klingon prison scenes looked like? This. Good lookin', but I'll take a steroid abuser in a dinosaur mask any day. I'm serious, just show up.
J.J. Abrams' Version Of Star Trek's Salt Vampire And Gorn Revealed [io9]
Thanks to Jase, who may or may not have just ordered some Mexican roids and a t-rex mask off eBay. I'll be waiting.
