Geekologie I Watch Stuff The Superficial

Meskel Square, A Massive Free-For-All Traffic Intersection

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This is a video shot above Meskel Square in Addis Ababa, Ethiopia. It's a massive free-for-all traffic intersection. From what I gathered, you just drive until you almost hit somebody, wait for them to move, then speed off again. The pedestrians though -- they're the real warriors here. I'd feel safer crossing the street in a slingshot.

Keep going for the impressively sane insanity.

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So, It's Come To This: Call Of Duty Loser Calls Real Life SWAT Team On Kid Who Killed Him In-Game

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Because if children are our hope for the future, then that future is hopeless, some little nobgoblin called a SWAT team on some other kid that killed him playing Call of Duty multiplayer. *tightening bolt on rocketship* My God I need to get off this planet. Even if I explode on the lauchpad, at least I tried. And I want my tombstone to read, "BOO -- I'M A GHOST!"

Police received a call at about 3 p.m. Tuesday afternoon from a person who identified himself as Rafael Castillo, a 17-year-old from Long Beach, N.Y.


"I just killed my mother and I might shoot more people," the person said, according to police.

The threat prompted Nassau County police to scramble helicopters and send a SWAT team to Castillo's home, leading to a two-hour standoff that involved more than 60 officers, some with guns drawn.

When police arrived, they found Castillo's mother, 54-year-old Maria Castillo, making coffee in the kitchen. Castillo himself did not immediately respond because he was in his room still playing the game with headphones on.

Castillo's mother said the time has now come for him to put down the "Call of Duty" controller.

"The kid played too much," she told WPIX-TV. "Go work. He's 17, he can work.

Seriously? You're such a sad sport that somebody killed you in a video game that you're going to waste taxpayer dollars (not to mention the time and effort of a police force that could be responding to legitimate calls) sending a SWAT team to somebody's house? You're prime prison material. You know what I do when somebody kills me in a video game? What any normal person does: yells and slams the controller down and scares my roommates. "Keep it down in there, I'm trying to study!" I'LL F***ING TEAR YOU LIMB FROM LIMB, DEREK. I'LL OPEN AN ETSY STORE AND SELL YOUR ARMS AS BACKSCRATCHERS. "What about my legs?" UP YOUR ASS.

Keep going for a video news report.

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You're Doing It Wrong: The Definitive Compilation Of People Struggling At Life In Infomercials

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What the -- 100% cotton?!

Because life is hard without the right novelty products to make it through the day, here's a compilation of people sucking at life in infomercials. It's got it all -- the woman who can't tie a towel around herself after a shower, people who can't crack eggs, cook pasta or bake brownies, people falling and hurting themselves, and some dude whose pecker explodes in a penis pump. Fine, I'm kidding about that last one. I've heard that can happen though, that's why I don't mess with those things. Kidding again, I don't mess with those things because I was blessed. Fun fact: did you know the expression, "Like a bull in a china shop" was originally, "Like a naked GW in a china shop" but they changed it because the imagery made it hard for people to concentrate on what they were being told? That's true. Also, if the people in these commercials really sucked at life this hard they'd all be f***ng dead.

Keep going for the video.

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Finland's Upcoming Series Of Homoerotic Postage Stamps

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This is a series of upcoming Finish postage stamps featuring the iconic homoerotic art of Tom of Finland (aka Touko Laaksonen). I'm really digging that one face and butt design. That guy's all, "Peekaboo, I see you! Like my mustache?" I would love to get a piece of mail with that on it. Truthfully, I'd love to get a piece of mail period. You know when the last time I got a piece of fan-mail was? Fan-mail, LOL. One time I actually thought I did get a fan letter until I recognized my mom's handwriting. She loves me and cares about me.

Thanks to IJJ and LupusYonderboy, who agree there should be far more nude postage stamps. Right? Maybe I'd start collecting again.

Homemade Game Of Thrones Iron Throne Beanbag Chair

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This is the beanbag Iron Throne made by Isabell Kiko of Nerd By Night (but what are you by day?!). She even includes patterns and instructions if you want to make your own, WHICH YOU DO. Sure yours won't look as good and will start losing its beans immediately, but hey -- you tried. You made the effort. That's more than I can say about most people. Also: wow, you look great today.

Keep going for a shot of Queen Isabell sitting in the thing with some sweet green paisley pants on (jealous!).

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Kissing The Carpet: Han Solo In Carbonite Floor Rugs

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These are the Han Solo in carbonite floor rugs available from ThinkGeek ($50 for a 71" x 31", $70 for a 90.5" x 39") Will they tie your room together? MAYBE. But they will definitely collect food and drink stains. Plus, if you invite me over, I will definitely try to feed Han some chips and dip. "Dammit GW, he's full, stop crushing chips into my rug." Shhhhhhh! You complete me Han, did you know that? I would go to the ends of the galaxy with you. What do you say we drop that Wookie off on Endor and start our lives together? "Please -- can we just get back to the intervention? We're here to help you." NOT NOW, MOM.

Keep going for a closeup of Han's lips and what the rug looks like on an actual floor.

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I'M NOT DEAD YET: Tree Stands Back Up When Getting Chainsawed To Pieces

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Least fun trampoline ever.

This is a video of a man cutting up a fallen tree, when the tree decides lying down isn't as relaxing as it originally sounded and gets back up. Or maybe jumping on that trampoline wasn't as fun as it thought. You know, when I lived in Virginia I cut down a dead tree in my backyard once. It f***ing CRUSHED my neighbor's fence. Then he came out angry and yelling at me and I was all, "You knew I was a drunk when you bought that house -- this is your bad."

Keep going for the short video.

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Impressive Game Of Thrones Interactive Map To Westeros

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This is an interactive map (links to actual map) of Westeros and the surrounding lands created by Westeros.org user carpiediem. You can click on pretty much anywhere to bring up a Game of Thrones wiki about the area, track characters' travels through the books and show, and more. Perhaps one of the coolest features is that is you can move the slider in the upper right corner to the latest chapter/show you've read/watched and the map will remove any information that happens after that so there aren't any spoilers. That's neat. Right now I'm make-believing I'm riding a dragon around Westeros burninating villages and claiming them as my own. Oh, they're shooting arrows at us -- you know what to do, Trogdor (I named my dragon Trogdor). Trogdor -- NO -- bleed and crash is not what we're supposed to do. Stop acting like that sissy Falcor, I thought you were a beast of war. Hey -- you know the egg your girlfriend laid that I said was stolen by the White Walkers? Well guess what -- I MADE AN OMELET. It was good, I don't regret it.

Thanks to Jackie, who took the time to tell me she's caught up on all the books AND shows. Go you! You should have told me earlier and I would have made you a banner or something.